You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
This is why betas fail every timeNope, touch them first but it can be anything.. Shaking hands, sharing a small couch, high 5's, whatever you do though, do it with confidence as if you already know she wants you to do it, otherwise you come across as an insecure creep.
Especially betas it always fails for betasThe short answer is both will work but I think it has more to do with your personality as to which you choose. I'm very muscular, full of testosterone and aggressive both in terms of actions and looks. I always touch first and get very good results from it. However I do it in a relaxed manner, as part of conversation and it seems completely normal.
It works for me because it comes across congruent to my personality, how I act, and what the woman is expecting. It comes across as natural for me to do that.
I think if others tried the same thing it might not work as well if they have a different personality than me, or if the woman is expecting something else.
Either way, both methods work, so choose the one that fits your personality best.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Doc's got class. Most pua's seem sleezy.So I am a confessed grabber. Between being tall and a good talker I normally get the desired results, eject or progress.
But I d love to know how the nonchalant crowd do it. I m an analyst by trade so fish/water. I ve asked on a heap of threads and never got any specific answers.
@wifehunter I m curious if u don't escalate physically on a date how do u screen out time wasters?
And how do u escalate non-physically to avoid being friend zoned.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Not true, I used to touch first all the time, without apologies and did whatever I wanted. It got me labeled as a bad boy, and it made them want to have sex with me, so I'm disagreeing with thatDoc's got class. Most pua's seem sleezy.
Be a catch, and never end up in the friend zone.
If she thinks all you want is sex, you're done.
Hand hold is huge, it means she yields to you and that she trusts you.I find it a good sign when a woman holds my hand for a good time.
I'm glad you pointed that out, they want all the attention... I'm still not super good with them. I mean if they want you like a piece of meat it's easy, but sometimes they lay back and if you go to them they will back off, it's like messing with a cat and I still don't have the process down for AW's.Depends on the girl. An AW will lose interest if you're too aggressive
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.