You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
If this is the case then I think maybe they mean by personality or character. Something they liked in their old boyfriend they saw in you as well. It might not be a physical resemblance but something about the type of person you are.marmel75 said:Don't really have context as this happened like 15 years ago, and I have no idea why I just thought to bring it up.
It happened a lot...basically I would be introduced to a new girl and would be talking to her and they would say this out of the blue...
"You look a lot like my old boyfriend!" or "You remind me a lot of a guy I used to date..."
Usually had a smile on their face after saying it...it got to the point I heard that so many time I started saying "I must have a lot of twins running around out here" or something similar when they said it...probably happened at least 10 to 12 different times throughout the years and usually within the first 10 minutes of talking to the girl...
There are other ways of giving "IOIs" than by mentioning an ex. She did it for a reason. You may see it differently but experience tells me it can definitely be a red flag. Not saying that the line alone means she's going to be a crazy cheater type, but I would watch for other flags.Social_Leper said:Erm..what brah? Not at all. Some girls just do this as a way to open a guy.
It's a compliment. One of the least subtle verbal IOIs I can think of.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I like this one! Adding it to my repertoire, if you don't mind.Danger said:Her: You look just like my ex
You: Let's give it another shot, I'll treat you right this time
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
/future ex-wife!!flashpoint said:what a coincidence, you just look like my new girlfriend