She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
If this is the case then I think maybe they mean by personality or character. Something they liked in their old boyfriend they saw in you as well. It might not be a physical resemblance but something about the type of person you are.marmel75 said:Don't really have context as this happened like 15 years ago, and I have no idea why I just thought to bring it up.
It happened a lot...basically I would be introduced to a new girl and would be talking to her and they would say this out of the blue...
"You look a lot like my old boyfriend!" or "You remind me a lot of a guy I used to date..."
Usually had a smile on their face after saying it...it got to the point I heard that so many time I started saying "I must have a lot of twins running around out here" or something similar when they said it...probably happened at least 10 to 12 different times throughout the years and usually within the first 10 minutes of talking to the girl...
There are other ways of giving "IOIs" than by mentioning an ex. She did it for a reason. You may see it differently but experience tells me it can definitely be a red flag. Not saying that the line alone means she's going to be a crazy cheater type, but I would watch for other flags.Social_Leper said:Erm..what brah? Not at all. Some girls just do this as a way to open a guy.
It's a compliment. One of the least subtle verbal IOIs I can think of.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I like this one! Adding it to my repertoire, if you don't mind.Danger said:Her: You look just like my ex
You: Let's give it another shot, I'll treat you right this time
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
/future ex-wife!!flashpoint said:what a coincidence, you just look like my new girlfriend