"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Worst chat-up line ever?!?

J

James Bondage

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OK, so I'm bored out of my tiny little mind here at work. There is nothing remotely inspiring happening, so to cheer myself (and hopefully others) up I have a question to pose.

What is the worst chat-up line of all time?!?

Doesn't necessarily have to be one you have used (although I guess you could get extra points for that), but just the most cringe-making jaw-droppingly bad chat-up line you can think of.

Here is mine to start things rolling (and no, I haven't tried it yet!)

Approach a group of girls, and say 'Hey girls, there's a party in my pants and your all invited!!' (complete with cheesy grin and two thumbs up)

Anyone beat that?!

:cheer:
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

W

WhitePimp

Master Don Juan
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I actually said in 8th grade

Me: "Do you have a boyfriend?"
Her: "No"
Me: "Want one?"

I mumbled it so it was probably inaudible to her but damn was I sweating like a beast. I probably masturbated like a fiend after that rejection.
 
L

L777

Master Don Juan
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"Nice shoes, wanna f.uck?"
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

T

The Juan and only

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If you can fvck 1/2 as good as your mother then just jump on top honey.
 
S

Soprano

Master Don Juan
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"who lies more?"

"hi!!!!!!!!!!!! whats your opinion on...."
 
S

ShizamDaMan

Master Don Juan
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"How many people have you slept with?"

That's akin to looking a gift horse in the mouth. Guys, you will never like the answer. Ever. Even if it's zero.
 
T

THE_ADDMAN

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Shezz said:
Use this in an Ultra ****y tone:

Shezz: Hey girls, can you catch?
HBs: Why?

(Self Point to Genitals)

Shezz: Because theres two ballz coming your way...:crackup:

Sarge On...
Click to expand...

lmao

just pull a Glen Quagmire

Female UPS: *knocks on door* Package! Package for a Mr. Glen Quagmire
Glen Quagmire: *answers door in a bathrobe* oh... excuse me for a second *walks away*
Glen Quagmire: *comes back naked* I got a package for you too! *thrust* alllllriiiight!
Female UPS runs away
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

E

Enjin 7

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Shezz said:
Use this in an Ultra ****y tone:

Shezz: Hey girls, can you catch?
HBs: Why?

(Self Point to Genitals)

Shezz: Because theres two ballz coming your way...:crackup:

Sarge On...
Click to expand...

LOLOL I've used that before and it worked! girls dig comedy :)
 
P

paraguayandj

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Me: U hungry
She: yeah
Me: I got some crabs I can share with you
 
L

LongDrinkofWater

Senior Don Juan
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Hungry?
How about a penis butter and jelly sandwich?
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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