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Why the Gym will make you more of an Incel than a player

Jake_Gyllenhaal69

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Jake, so often in life we have a situation like this - where individuals are discussing a situation from two different angles - they are in effect saying the same thing - but somehow it turns into an argument. I'm sure most people who have an IQ higher than room temperature have noticed this.

Then egos get involved and it becomes a shyte show.

When I have started conversations with someone and it goes this way and I recognize what's going on I often rephrase my initial statement - it's the same content, it's just more tailored to the audience. This often works.

Here at SS, I've learned that over time we have so many different personalities, backgrounds, socio-economic levels, experience levels, ethnicities, religions, and politics that it becomes a labyrinth sometimes when navigating lightning rod subjects.

I think if you simply rephrase your initial stance a little most of us would agree with your statement as we have noted.
This is the problem with the internet in general. The war on Andrew Tate is a great example of this. People will snip 2 seconds of a hour video and weaponize it against you. I have clearly stated that the gym should be utilized by normal minded people. I don't even blame the gym for inceldom, I blame the pipeline being used as a jumpstart from the gym to manipulate vulnerable young men.
 

EyeBRollin

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Gym is cool. I respect athletic more. I can already lift a lot. Loses its luster after you get there. Yeah, I squat 3 plates full depth natty. And?

I do road cycling now. Much harder to climb a mountain and ride 100 miles than Squat a lot.
 

Pierce.Manhammer

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This specific subject has been discussed so many times here people have a knee-jerk reaction to it. Many people only read the subject and the first few sentences and frankly many lack reading comprehension, we also have a population of ESL readers and posters. Long posts tend to be TLDR, and someone's initial reaction to what they did see and comprehend is harsh. Especially on lightning rod issues like to lift or not.

Anyway, I think most of us agree that a great physique may get you upfront attention and maybe an ONS if you're a troglodyte, but will not get you a hot GF for an LTR alone, there are other things that come into play as well. I think that's the best paraphrase of your post - would you agree?

This is the problem with the internet in general. The war on Andrew Tate is a great example of this. People will snip 2 seconds of a hour video and weaponize it against you. I have clearly stated that the gym should be utilized by normal minded people. I don't even blame the gym for inceldom, I blame the pipeline being used as a jumpstart from the gym to manipulate vulnerable young men.
 

sangheilios

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I've been into exercising and lifting for well over a decade now, I started around 17. I've been in and around gym culture for quite some time and seen and been around a lot so I have a good amount of input on this topic, as there is a degree of truth to it.

To start, women definitely are more primally attracted to men that are fit and muscular, there really is no debate over this. However, there are certain things about gym broing that definitely can prove detrimental in regard to dating life, which I'll get into below.

- One very common trend I've noticed over the many years is that many of the men that get into this are often short. I've always felt that the gym and building up muscle was a means for these individuals to compensate for their lack of height. We all know that short(er) men don't do as well in the dating market.

The biggest variable though, which has multiple points, is that some men take the gym thing to the point where it can become unattractive, which I'll elaborate on.

First, some guys take it to a level where they bulk up like crazy and honestly become fat, they might be able to push a lot of weight on a bench press but they are well into overweight territory and honestly not in shape. I've seen guys like this and other men will encourage them with all the weight they are moving on a stationary exercise but yet they struggle to go up a flight of stairs or even do bodyweight exercises like chin ups or dips. The means to address this is to keep the bodyfat levels at a healthy range and be all around fit and active, easy fix.

The next thing that some men do is they go on steroids, Now, not everyone is going to look like a freak whilst on the sauce but for many men it will give them an appearance that doesn't look right for their frame. Women are honestly not all that attracted to the bodybuilder look and as mentioned above they prefer a muscular and fit body but nothing at all like what you see in bodybuilding magazines.

Another big point to consider is that many men end up getting so into the gym thing that it takes over their life to the point where they no longer have one. There is nothing wrong with going to the gym multiple days per way. However, when you are constantly carrying around shaker bottles, timing your meals or refusing to go out to parties and dinners with your friends, girlfriends, family, etc. it's going to create some issues in your social and dating life. The crazy thing is that it's not difficult to balance this and stay fit, all it requires is just consistent exercising and eating well with some occasional treating yourself within reason. You also don't need to be in the gym nearly every single day of the week for hours on end. Get some other hobbies besides the gym that are also active, go hiking on some new trail you found with your girlfriend or go to the beach, etc.

I feel these points above address this rather well.
 

EyeOnThePrize

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Now, if you love the gym then continue going to the gym. My only stance is that going to the gym for the sole purpose of attracting more women is completely stupid.



Urban dictionary is meant to be cominical, but I will give you a real answer. A gymcel is an Incel that uses the gym to mask his insecurities with life and women plain and simple. How is this possible? I already explained it in my OP, but you only cherry pick and say "YOU SAID THE GYM IS BAD FOR YOU" and go on long tangents about it. Essentially, it can lead a vulnerable man down a pipeline to the path of an Incel because he was merely having issues with women. I never said do not go to the gym, I said "DO NOT GO TO THE GYM FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF ATTRACTING WOMEN" which will you keep you from sliding down this incel pipeline. If you have issues on what an Incel believes than go take that out with them not me.
Random color pills, incel, gymcel, and all -cel derivatives are these obscure poorly defined categories in the manosphere used mainly as marketing devices.

In reality no one is a true gymcel, no one is a true incel, except maybe one in a million dudes, and according to these shiitty definitions they can stop being one instantly by changing their mindset.

This 'pipeline' you talk about affects almost no one. The large majority of dudes already know they need to socialize more to get chicks, among other things. The ones that don't figure it out pretty quick. Go survey 100 dudes in any big city gym and I bet not one will say 'all I have to do is workout and pusssy will fall in my lap'.

Sure guys can overestimate how much muscle definition can play into game, but there are so many other variables involved that there is no one size fits all answer. For some guys that literally might be all they need. It's not the concept as much as your absolutist phrasing that irked me.

Let's agree to disagree, since a contrary opinion and any criticism seems to make you defensive. I don't have to be a part of this circlejerk, enjoy.
 
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BadBoy89

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The op has to play to extremes, because that's the only place it has any footing.
150% right.

This comment very well thought out. I agree with it 150%.
 

SW15

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To start, women definitely are more primally attracted to men that are fit and muscular, there really is no debate over this.
Big muscles can help a man get to enjoy some vagina. Big muscles alone do not lead to vagina.

The next thing that some men do is they go on steroids, Now, not everyone is going to look like a freak whilst on the sauce but for many men it will give them an appearance that doesn't look right for their frame. Women are honestly not all that attracted to the bodybuilder look and as mentioned above they prefer a muscular and fit body but nothing at all like what you see in bodybuilding magazines.
Steroids can affect penile function and testicular function/appearance. So not worth it.

Another big point to consider is that many men end up getting so into the gym thing that it takes over their life to the point where they no longer have one. There is nothing wrong with going to the gym multiple days per way. However, when you are constantly carrying around shaker bottles, timing your meals or refusing to go out to parties and dinners with your friends, girlfriends, family, etc. it's going to create some issues in your social and dating life. The crazy thing is that it's not difficult to balance this and stay fit, all it requires is just consistent exercising and eating well with some occasional treating yourself within reason. You also don't need to be in the gym nearly every single day of the week for hours on end. Get some other hobbies besides the gym that are also active, go hiking on some new trail you found with your girlfriend or go to the beach, etc.
I've never met a man that fits this description. Have you?
 

sangheilios

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Big muscles can help a man get to enjoy some vagina. Big muscles alone do not lead to vagina.



Steroids can affect penile function and testicular function/appearance. So not worth it.



I've never met a man that fits this description. Have you?
Whenever you go on steroids your body will shut down it's own natural testosterone production, which leads to atrophied testicles and a sperm count that is nonexistent. For those who may possibly want to have children, this should definitely be considered.

One drug that is somewhat common is deca and ironically enough one of the symptoms of this particular drug is 'deca ****". I forget the exact reason why it causes this issue but it's related to the balance of your estrogen levels and a host of other things. I do believe that there is a healthier way to take steroids but from what I've seen it can become a problem where you cycle a variety of drugs to mitigate the side effects of others, I shouldn't have to elaborate on why this is an issue.

For those that are health conscious, your HDL levels drop while your LDL levels increase, which is a risk factor for heart/cardiovascular disease. I've also seen some stuff where guys that started relatively young and never hopped off may have to be on testosterone replacement therapy for the rest of their lives. There was a video Larry Wheels made where he talks about this.

There's a channel I found a while ago that has a lot of great information on this, just about anything you want to know on this subject you can find it on there.

Anabolic Doc - YouTube
 

sangheilios

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I've never met a man that fits this description. Have you?
As for this comment, it was a bit of an exaggeration but there's a reason why it's a meme on the internet. I've mentioned this before, but the bodybuilding sub culture as we know it was initiated by a man name Joe Weider, he is considered the god father of the modern bodybuilding movement and also had a fitness equipment line. He passed away several years ago and it was revealed that he was a gay man that had a fetish for muscular men. I feel a lot of this bodybuilding stuff has something about it where these men are super deep in the closet and most likely aren't aware of it.

With that out of the way, if you've ever met some of these guys you'll find that their entire lives are heavily regimented. Their focus and dedication is admirable in a way, as at the end of the day they are not receiving any sort of benefit other than personal satisfaction. However, it will most definitely create issues in your social life and you may find yourself isolated from others. I feel in a situation like this you'd only identify with people that are in the same boat.
 

Fruitbat

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Then why do I see a lot of muscular guys with average to ugly girls?
I can answer this one.

It’s because they have nothing else.

Women aren’t that into looks. I mean, I’ve been ripped once in my life for a couple of years, most of the time I’ve been average with a moderate paunch and for some of it I’ve been obese.

I didn’t notice women cvmming harder when I was ripped or going bananas. It sure did help with approach.

Similarly, being overweight, it does not help approach, it kills it. If you can get a girl into bed though, her pvssy gets wet.

I don’t doubt guys who have the complete package - muscles, abs and game, and wealth, and social skills etc, will get laid all the time. However, if you’re just buff - but like a lot of buff dudes, If you’re a boring fvck who can’t speak to women then you’re not going to do well.

I’ve known some buff dudes who have the kind of mathematical personality. No flair, the kind of guys who have neat and tidy sock drawers and are tight with their money. No charisma. These guys will get eaten alive by dudes who are just regular but dress and act with flair.
 

SmoothSmooth

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Same goes for motorcycles and most sports cars, often you'll just attract attention from heterosexual men.

Your internal mindstate is most important. Many guys alsoo use the gym as a a crutch to build confidence.

That's not to say you shouldn't go but your focus should be on improving physical fitness above all else.
a $500 jacket or pair of shoes will attract women more than a $50,000 car

motorcycles can add to sex appeal tho
 

MatureDJ

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One very common trend I've noticed over the many years is that many of the men that get into this are often short. I've always felt that the gym and building up muscle was a means for these individuals to compensate for their lack of height. We all know that short(er) men don't do as well in the dating market.
The story of my life. :mad::mad::mad:
 

BadBoy89

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If you're reading this, please disregard anybody that says being a regular gymgoer is anything but beneficial.

This thread is absurd, and those who agree with OP are themselves coping.
Great post. 100% agree.

This is 100% true and I completely completely agree with it.
 

eli77

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Love this post this is why I joined his form over a decade ago my hometown at one point had a YMCA and a mom and pop gym that is still around during covid there was a major snapback and working out with friends at home so and so forth now that everything's opening up we have a 24 or orange fitness a YMCA a mom and pop and a CrossFit gym humans are social creature James will always have the pros and cons more pros if you're an introvert like most of the guys on here are.
 

buddhafukko

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I saw a chart from the OKData dating pool that plotted womens interest in muscular men across their lifespan. I don't recall the specifics but it basically tanked around 40. After age 40 a man's great physique was of minimal value in the dating market. This is pretty obviously reflected by the fact women are looking for resources usually to help take care of their satan spawns. The take away was be ripped in your twenties and rich by your 40s. Look at Dicaprio he had a raging beer gut and often looks like a pig. I'm not knocking physical fitness. I'm a gym rat and it help my confidence and probably testosterone which in turn makes me much better with women. But the idea that women want aging bodybuilders is a serious cope.
 

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Rainman4707

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Last couple of girls I've had sex with kept being complimentary about my body and how fit I was, how much energy I had...so going to the gym has benefited me.
I go to the gym because it makes me feel good and I ENJOY it.
 

lost_blackbird

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motorcycles can add to sex appeal tho
Whilst on some level I don't doubt this, it hasn't yielded me any results though beyond a couple of wanting/curious glances..
Just for information, I ride a 1000cc Yamaha good for about 170mph, not some little scooter thing, and I'm plenty slim enough
to still look good in leathers, despite my age, no beer gut here.
 

Pedrito0906

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Mega Cope thread, why the hate on people who want to look good naked? With obesity raging the 50% being muscular is different and attractive. I agree that developing game and an exciting life is should be also a goal, but also the one thing you have control is the physique why not being better?
 
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