Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Hey great point. This has happened to me a lot recently...I didn't think of it in this way. I'm going to remember this as I try to be more friendly/social.AlekNovi said:I was at that point 2-3 years ago.
Are you somewhat socially anxious, and care what people think when in social situations?
If so, it happens that people tend to very wrongly misinterpret being introverted for being arrogant (being above them).
If you're socially unskilled AND badly dressed they term you a creep, loser or nerd. If you are dressed good (because creeps, nerds and losers can't be dressed well), then they assume you must be arrogant then, because that's the only reason you wouldn't talk to them and be the life of the party.
Your attire plays a part in defining what people think of you. The people with whom you socialize play a part in defining what you think about yourself. Elevate your company! Don't change your dress.gunit630 said:I dress to impress the *****es and some people think that I think Im better then everyone. Do any of yall get this and how do you handle it?
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Very good point dude. Find people that try to be better. Not people that want you to be the same as everyone elseedmond said:If you are better than the rest, then well done:rockon: . Most of the people I see, men AND women look like sacks of sh*t. Why should you lower your high standards?
If you are an Alpha, why should you care what the rabble think?
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I wish I would have realized that years ago... I wouldn't have wasted so many years with fairweather-friends-in-disguise.gunit630 said:Very good point dude. Find people that try to be better. Not people that want you to be the same as everyone else
If people think that about you, it's probably got more to do with your attitude than your clothes. If this is the case, you need to chill out bro; there is nothing attractive about being full of yourself.gunit630 said:I dress to impress the *****es and some people think that I think Im better then everyone. Do any of yall get this and how do you handle it?
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.