"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Why do people think Im trying to be better then everyone?
- Thread starter gunit630
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan
tr0ublemaker
Don Juan
im pretty much a dirty boy (not hygiene) in clean clothes
Delta
Master Don Juan
if the vibe of the gathering is casual and you are dressed to the 9s, that is actually a social faux pas... on par with being UNDERDRESSED (although when in doubt, it is better to be slightly overdressed, it IS offensive if you are WILDLY OVERDRESSED for the occasion).
this is actually a turn off for women too... more than anything, they seem to want a guy that is APPROPRIATE rather than spiffy.
delta
AlekNovi
Don Juan
Are you somewhat socially anxious, and care what people think when in social situations?
Is this coming from BOTH women and men (who could care less about fashion?)
If so, it happens that people tend to very wrongly misinterpret being introverted for being arrogant (being above them).
When I first started dating and getting more social, girls who knew me from before all told me the same thing (you were so arrogant, and thought you were above everyone else)... How did they conclude that? Because I was well-dressed, yet didn't go and start conversations, and didn't smile all the time (are you mostly expressionless?).
When you aren't very social and talkative, when you are somewhat shy and introverted, people tend to project the worst on you (since you're like a blank emotionless canvas).
If you're socially unskilled AND badly dressed they term you a creep, loser or nerd. If you are dressed good (because creeps, nerds and losers can't be dressed well), then they assume you must be arrogant then, because that's the only reason you wouldn't talk to them and be the life of the party.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
~attrACTION~
Banned
Hey great point. This has happened to me a lot recently...I didn't think of it in this way. I'm going to remember this as I try to be more friendly/social.AlekNovi said:
dap
Senior Don Juan
the solution is to just be more friendly and social?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
edmond
Senior Don Juan
If you are better than the rest, then well done:rockon: . Most of the people I see, men AND women look like sacks of sh*t. Why should you lower your high standards?
If you are an Alpha, why should you care what the rabble think?
edmond
Senior Don Juan
I forgot, try and read fashion or sport books and guide so you find out what makes you look EVEN better, e.g.: types of shirts, colour coordination, posture...
Then no one will criticize you anymore, because you will have left all these little people behind.
Yes, it’s lonely at the top
.
Nexxus
Senior Don Juan
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Kings_royalty
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 7, 2006
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If people think that about you, it's probably got more to do with your attitude than your clothes. If this is the case, you need to chill out bro; there is nothing attractive about being full of yourself.gunit630 said:
The type of clothes you wear shouldn't have any type of bearing on your personality. Sure, some clothes will make you feel a little bit more confident about yourself, but don't start acting like your $hit doesn't stink just because you look good; that's ridiculous.
Kings_royalty
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 7, 2006
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- 343
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You don't want to be labeled the nice guy or the ****y d*ckhead, you will loose in both cases. If you want to play the ****y d*ckhead role, do it in a playful manner (I do it all the time and it works great), but don't go around acting like an a$$hole thinking that it is going to attract girls and move you up in social circles, it doesn't work that way.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.