"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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What is your opinion on my situation?

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Don Juan
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Ok, here goes:

A few nights ago I went to a baseball game with all my coworkers. It's alot of fun, nobody really pays attention to the game, it's really just a good time to hang out and talk and stuff like that. Anyway, most of my coworkers are college students, and the girl who gave me a ride to the game was sitting next to me the whole time. I've known her for a long time, about 3 years, and never really considered her an option because of the age difference. I'm 17, she's 23. So we're talking and all that, and she tells me that her and a bunch of my coworkers are going to the local bar and asked if I wanted to go because they don't card on weekdays. I had to tell her no because I had to go home to my parents and my curfew is 11pm. Well, a few minutes later, just out of the blue she leans over to talk to me and tells me that if I ever wanted to come over to her appartment to drink with her, stay the night, and just hang out that it would be totally cool. I said sure, and we traded #'s. Anyways, I haven't talked to her about it since then, and was wondering if anyone thought it might be innuendo. Kinda like a "Why don't you come in for some coffee" thing.
Just lookin' for opinions on whether it might lead to more than just drinking. I am gonna take her up on her offer just to see where it leads. In anycase I get the chance to get wasted, so it's all good.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Porky

Master Don Juan
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MIGHT be innuendo?

If I said that to most of my female friends, that would simultaneously ruin the friendship and my reputation. Go for it, and go for it hard.
 

splinterkb

Master Don Juan
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Minnesota
Green light means GO!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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