"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

What if she left you because of communication issues?

B

B0redandl0nely

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 26, 2017
Messages
388
Reaction score
34
Age
35
Location
nyc
Howiestern said:
I get the AS thing, I've got many of the traits. I dated a girl that pointed it out to me. Once she realized I had a mild case, she became more understanding of how I was.

You will have to become better at addressing your shortcomings.

The movie "The Accountant" is a great window into what its like for someone with Asperger's and how they effect others around them. It helped me see a lot of myself.

You are going to have to get the fundamentals down first as the others have mentioned.
Click to expand...
Would you tell her if you were me?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Thorninmyside

Thorninmyside

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 18, 2014
Messages
622
Reaction score
356
Third topic, same girl. Just out of interest, what just the rest of your life consist of? Do you work, study, have hobbies? Do you work out? Do you have interesting things going on in your life that a woman would be intrigued by?
 
B

B0redandl0nely

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 26, 2017
Messages
388
Reaction score
34
Age
35
Location
nyc
I go to college and work out. That's about it. I have aspergers syndrome so my interests are limited. I also have bipolar disorder which makes me depressed most of the time.
 
A

AJ84

Guest
B0redandl0nely said:
Would you tell her if you were me?
Click to expand...
I think you should disclose ( when you feel comfortable doing so) the next time you start to really like a girl. If you don't you risk her wondering why you are acting a certain way and assuming things, as this girl did.

Hiding it implies you have some character flaw. You didn't choose to have AS or bipolar.

I'm not going to insult you by implying that your concerns have an easy fix. They don't, but the fact that you have insight into them can help you find ways to overcome some of the challenges that you may be facing with dating.

I have a close relative with AS. Some guys here are going to tell you to socialize more or talk to girls more or open up more without understanding the issue around communication and AS.

Also, if you are on a mood stabilizer for the bi polar and feel depressed most of the time as you stated you may want to talk to your doc about that. Effectively treating bi polar often involves a lot of trail and error with different meds and doses etc.
 
B

B0redandl0nely

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 26, 2017
Messages
388
Reaction score
34
Age
35
Location
nyc
MidnightCity said:
so this didnt even qualify as a relationship. thus there was never even a "breakup"

this girl did the right thing and did you a favor. consider yourself lucky
Click to expand...
I'm gonna hit her up again and see what happens. What do I have to lose? I'm talking to more girls on POF anyway.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

ubercat

ubercat

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2015
Messages
3,671
Reaction score
2,309
Location
Australia
Oh god another sperg who knows best. At this rate Richard the frog can setup as a dating coach.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top