Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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What exactly is confidence?

Babnik

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Is it that:

You WILL get her?
You CAN get her?

Shouldn't confidence build up on your experiences? If you get constantly blown off, how can you be confident?

Lets say you do 50 approachs and first 10 did not work, how could further approaches be made with confidence at all?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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The Nice Guy is Gone

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Because the confidence is within you, not necessarily with experiences. The frame of mind you should have when those first 10 reject you should be, "Well, it's their loss, not mine." Or something like, "They just lost out big-time."

Confidence starts in the mindset, and then builds up with approaching.
 

Babnik

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The Nice Guy is Gone said:
Because the confidence is within you, not necessarily with experiences. The frame of mind you should have when those first 10 reject you should be, "Well, it's their loss, not mine." Or something like, "They just lost out big-time."

Confidence starts in the mindset, and then builds up with approaching.

But thinking like that is just an excuse for your own POSSIBLE failure. I mean, its like saying "Oh, I got a D because I had a crappy professor!" while it was your performance that got you a D!
 

Docs

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Confidence is knowing you have the slightest chances for success, the greatest of failures, yet you still perform with the strength of determination without holding back.
 

blinkwatt

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Docs said:
Confidence is knowing you have the slightest chances for success, the greatest of failures, yet you still perform with the strength of determination without holding back.
Bingo! Couldn't have said it better myself.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Babnik

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Docs said:
Confidence is knowing you have the slightest chances for success, the greatest of failures, yet you still perform with the strength of determination without holding back.
And thats what women like? A guy who has SLIGHT chance of success and GREAT chance of failure?
 

blinkwatt

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Babnik said:
And thats what women like? A guy who has SLIGHT chance of success and GREAT chance of failure?
No thats not what he is saying. Even with the odds against you,you have faith in yourself to beats the odds.
 

Docs

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Babnik said:
And thats what women like? A guy who has SLIGHT chance of success and GREAT chance of failure?
No, it's about still trying even when you're facing the girl that makes you tremble, or the problem that makes you want to avoid it all together.
 

Babnik

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Espi said:
Confidence is doing what you feel regardless of the consequences...

Now, of course, I DO NOT mean stealing, raping, looting, or any other illegal activity in which yourself or others are harmed or degraded.

Confidence is approaching the hottest girl at the party, despite the possiblity of being rejected or shaking as you talk to her.

To rephrase an oft-quoted cliche: Confidence is not the absence of fear; it's acting in spite of the fear.

Confidence is saying what no else says, though it needs to be said.

Confidence is doing what no one else does, though it needs to be done.

Confidence is marked by self-content thoughts and actions, and a confident man doesn't much care if people love or hate him. Yet, he is liked by many.


You guys talk about COURAGE and PERSISTANCE.

Go to dictionary.com and type in CONFIDENCE. Its about being SURE or TRUST into something.

If you are NOT sure - you are NOT confident.
 

blinkwatt

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Babnik said:
Go to dictionary.com and type in CONFIDENCE. Its about being SURE or TRUST into something.
That sounds more like faith to me is the word they are looking for,to each their own.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Babnik

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So now it seems a lot of people really do not know what confidence is...maybe thats the problem.
 

bauer_23

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It's the difference between thinking you can and knowing you can.
 

Babnik

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bauer_23 said:
It's the difference between thinking you can and knowing you can.



OK, let me get it straight. You approach a girl and you should FEEL that "I can **** her" , right?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Babnik said:
Is it that:

You WILL get her?
You CAN get her?
Confidence has absolutely nothing to do with her and everything to do with you.
 

ChrizZ

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It is really weird. The more I get rejected, the more confident I get because I know that I can face my fear anytime, anywhere...
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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The Nice Guy is Gone

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ChrizZ said:
It is really weird. The more I get rejected, the more confident I get because I know that I can face my fear anytime, anywhere...
Actually, when I get rejected now, when I end up getting home, I laugh about it. It's kind of funny these days, when I do get rejected.

Because I haven't lost a thing, and they have lost a great opportunity.
 

Bvbidd

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You just keep telling yourself that. :D

If they reject ya, they got a reason. You failed. Don't tell yourself anything else or your using the most mentally unhealthy defence mech there is, denial. :yes: There is more to girls then conquering your fear of em, lol.

Sorry, you needed that to come back down to the real world.
 

The Nice Guy is Gone

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Bvbidd said:
You just keep telling yourself that. :D

If they reject ya, they got a reason. You failed. Don't tell yourself anything else or your using the most mentally unhealthy defence mech there is, denial. :yes: There is more to girls then conquering your fear of em, lol.

Sorry, you needed that to come back down to the real world.
I'm in the real world--and I don't need you to tell me what I need. I'm happy, and I know what I want. And yeah, they may have a reason to reject ya, but more often than not, it's not a good one. So, before you start ridiculing someone and claiming that they are not in the real world, back up a bit.
 

Babnik

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Bvbidd said:
You just keep telling yourself that. :D

If they reject ya, they got a reason. You failed. Don't tell yourself anything else or your using the most mentally unhealthy defence mech there is, denial. :yes: There is more to girls then conquering your fear of em, lol.

Sorry, you needed that to come back down to the real world.
And who said the girls you approach are WORTH a guy who has the game and all that? Most girls I talk to open their mouth and CRAP comes out of it...
Nobody is perfect anyway.
 

Nighthawk

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Confidence is inversely proportionate to doubt. Arrogance is the absence of doubt, yet doubt is useful in moderation. So confidence is best achieved by entertaining doubt but not making it your master.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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