Update on girl that told me its better to stop 1.5 months ago

BackInTheGame78

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Since our last encounter Ive been on a strict diet working out regime 5 days a week so I lost a lot of bodyfat and gained massive muscles.
So it's been 6 weeks according to the post?

You can definitely lose some bodyfat in that time and gain some muscle(I've dropped 30lbs in that timeframe before), but if you lost a lot of weight you likely are carrying less muscle now than you were...that's just how the body works.

Yes, you may have gained some definition from losing fat, but your overall muscle mass has decreased unless you are taking some sort of steroid cycle, so gaining "massive muscles" just doesn't really add up. Unless of course you are on a cycle.
 

Canadian_Man

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@Divorced w 3
I kinda like my position right now. She saw that I look sharper and fit, she saw me happy, I was friendly polite warm and nice we even hugged so that’s her last experience and memory of me now. That will leave her hamster running crazy if I like her, if I want her and she knows I don’t hate her now. So that hamster could lead to a text. I like to leave her wondering, in the meantime I pursue new women and learn from past mistakes. I just think my value will be lower if I text her.
The word I've bolded and underlined says something about your mindset here.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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OP, can I ask your age and hers?
 

BaronOfHair

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Everyone here advised me to move on after telling her I wanted to try things seriousley and her declining that she didn't have confidence that would work...
Yet, you followed the example of The Intersectionalist-leaning freshgirl... Cautioned by several sane, intelligent people not to get blackout drunk at frat parties, she went ahead and did so anyway


And now continues to feign perplexion over her fate. Even though the answer to the initial question ("What do I do now?")hasn't changed... Get on with life, and stop ruminating on something that's already gone to s-it
 

holidayad_

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Maybe she thought you were going to chase after her. And she was surprised when she saw that you weren't.

And that made her more attracted.

Well done.
 

The Duke

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@Gambino -

I wouldn't be so hard headed over the contacting her concern. If she is truly interested then it won't matter. The girls you have to play games with to attract/re-attract aren't worth it anyways.

I'd take my time and be patient. Make sure this is what you want. A LTR will likely be the only card on the table in this situation. If you start seeing her again, I would be skeptical and just take it day by day.

I've had these deals go 2 ways.

A. Start seeing each other again and its only about sex & friendship. Eventually she says no more and/or you find some other girl.
B. You make an effort to resolve the problems that created the divide, yet things never get back to how they were before and the relationship comes to an end again.

Sometimes a guy has to ask himself..........If I was banging some other girl that was hot, sweet, submissive, fuhked, like a p0rnstar, etc would I be interested in seeing my exgf still? If you haven't banged anything else since her and you still miss her somewhat, is this just horniness and old emotions talking or is this something pure and deep?

I wish it wasn't true, but its almost always best to move on and find somebody new. But I wouldn't know this if I'd of never went back to several exes and figured this out. ;-) So there is value to be had from such things. Never hurts to try something again so you know for sure.

All we can do is better realize what you want and need, and learn from our past.
 

TheGambino

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@Gambino -

I wouldn't be so hard headed over the contacting her concern. If she is truly interested then it won't matter. The girls you have to play games with to attract/re-attract aren't worth it anyways.

I'd take my time and be patient. Make sure this is what you want. A LTR will likely be the only card on the table in this situation. If you start seeing her again, I would be skeptical and just take it day by day.

I've had these deals go 2 ways.

A. Start seeing each other again and its only about sex & friendship. Eventually she says no more and/or you find some other girl.
B. You make an effort to resolve the problems that created the divide, yet things never get back to how they were before and the relationship comes to an end again.

Sometimes a guy has to ask himself..........If I was banging some other girl that was hot, sweet, submissive, fuhked, like a p0rnstar, etc would I be interested in seeing my exgf still? If you haven't banged anything else since her and you still miss her somewhat, is this just horniness and old emotions talking or is this something pure and deep?

I wish it wasn't true, but its almost always best to move on and find somebody new. But I wouldn't know this if I'd of never went back to several exes and figured this out. ;-) So there is value to be had from such things. Never hurts to try something again so you know for sure.

All we can do is better realize what you want and need, and learn from our past.
Thanks I’m going to think about it
 

Glassguy

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Did I miss the part that she reached out and started chasing him? Because outside of that, it's la la land.
 
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