Chosen1
Master Don Juan
oooo i got one how about sorry about all the crying or it was bigger this morning
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
The worst thing to say after sex
- Thread starter Blackdragon5095
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
"I've had worse"
Rebound Material
Master Don Juan
HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHA!!!!Bonhomme said:
oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan
her- how was it?
this is where you give a blank look, kinda like a dear in the headlights. then you get dressed without talkin and leave
this is where you give a blank look, kinda like a dear in the headlights. then you get dressed without talkin and leave
Doggystyle
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 20, 2005
- Messages
- 374
- Reaction score
- 4
Wow......I was fantastic!
You dirty *****!
You might want to shave that next time
You are welcome!
I've already called you a taxi before we started, should be here any minute
I always seem to drop my standards when i'm drunk, you lucky lucky girl
Whoa!!! Keep the lights turned off til you've got your clothes back on
You dirty *****!
You might want to shave that next time
You are welcome!
I've already called you a taxi before we started, should be here any minute
I always seem to drop my standards when i'm drunk, you lucky lucky girl
Whoa!!! Keep the lights turned off til you've got your clothes back on
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Rocko
Senior Don Juan
"I gotta get the hell outta here"
I like the deer in the headlights one though haha
I like the deer in the headlights one though haha
Nzo
Don Juan
you: Oh sh*t
her: what?!
you: My penis piercing is missing
her: what?!
you: My penis piercing is missing
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
:crackup:
some very good ones ~~~~
some very good ones ~~~~
Blackdragon5095
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2005
- Messages
- 453
- Reaction score
- 6
I have to say, this is 1 of the meanest stuff a guy could say to a girl. 
Very funny too :crackup:
Maybe this will end up in the archive :cheer:
Ketp the posts coming
Very funny too :crackup:
Maybe this will end up in the archive :cheer:
Ketp the posts coming
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
LMFAO!!!
Her: That was great
Me: Yeah until you started snorting like a pig
Her: That was so amazing
Me: Just wait until I upload the footage to the internet
Her: Your are so incredible!
Me: *checks off notepad* Number 63 This week
Her: How was it?
Me: You **** like hellen keller
Rebound Material
Master Don Juan
HER: Was it good for you?
ME: you happen to play world of warcraft? cuz you surely werent WOW.(nerds will get this one =P)
ME: you happen to play world of warcraft? cuz you surely werent WOW.(nerds will get this one =P)
Dannyrt34
Master Don Juan
Things NOT to say after sex.
"Did I mention the video camera?"
"Aw hell baby, a little rug burn never hurt anybody."
"Do you accept visa?"
"And to think I was really trying to pick up your friend!"
"Gee I hope you still look good when I'm sober."
"SMILE! You're on candid camera."
"I thought YOU had the keys to the handcuffs!"
"Wow baby you're good enough to do this for a living!"
"Are you sure I don't know you from somewhere?"
"That leak better be from the waterbed."
"Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed?"
"Is that you? Or is your mattress stuffed with rotten potatoes?"
"It sure is nice being in bed with a woman I don't have to inflate or blow up."
"Wow you're almost as good as my ex."
"I really hate women who actually think sex MEANS something."
"Have you seen FATAL ATTRACTION?"
"Sorry about the nametags, I'm bad with names."
"You mean you're NOT my blind date???"
"Did I mention the video camera?"
"Aw hell baby, a little rug burn never hurt anybody."
"Do you accept visa?"
"And to think I was really trying to pick up your friend!"
"Gee I hope you still look good when I'm sober."
"SMILE! You're on candid camera."
"I thought YOU had the keys to the handcuffs!"
"Wow baby you're good enough to do this for a living!"
"Are you sure I don't know you from somewhere?"
"That leak better be from the waterbed."
"Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed?"
"Is that you? Or is your mattress stuffed with rotten potatoes?"
"It sure is nice being in bed with a woman I don't have to inflate or blow up."
"Wow you're almost as good as my ex."
"I really hate women who actually think sex MEANS something."
"Have you seen FATAL ATTRACTION?"
"Sorry about the nametags, I'm bad with names."
"You mean you're NOT my blind date???"
Blackdragon5095
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2005
- Messages
- 453
- Reaction score
- 6
"Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed?"
LMAO !!!! :crackup:
LMAO !!!! :crackup:
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Nzo
Don Juan
I vote Archive material
DaPainkillah
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 2, 2006
- Messages
- 12
- Reaction score
- 2
Dannyrt34 said:
AWESOME!!!