Chosen1
Master Don Juan
oooo i got one how about sorry about all the crying or it was bigger this morning
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
The worst thing to say after sex
- Thread starter Blackdragon5095
- Start date
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
"I've had worse"
Rebound Material
Master Don Juan
HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHA!!!!Bonhomme said:
oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan
her- how was it?
this is where you give a blank look, kinda like a dear in the headlights. then you get dressed without talkin and leave
this is where you give a blank look, kinda like a dear in the headlights. then you get dressed without talkin and leave
Doggystyle
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 20, 2005
- Messages
- 374
- Reaction score
- 4
Wow......I was fantastic!
You dirty *****!
You might want to shave that next time
You are welcome!
I've already called you a taxi before we started, should be here any minute
I always seem to drop my standards when i'm drunk, you lucky lucky girl
Whoa!!! Keep the lights turned off til you've got your clothes back on
You dirty *****!
You might want to shave that next time
You are welcome!
I've already called you a taxi before we started, should be here any minute
I always seem to drop my standards when i'm drunk, you lucky lucky girl
Whoa!!! Keep the lights turned off til you've got your clothes back on
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Rocko
Senior Don Juan
"I gotta get the hell outta here"
I like the deer in the headlights one though haha
I like the deer in the headlights one though haha
Nzo
Don Juan
you: Oh sh*t
her: what?!
you: My penis piercing is missing
her: what?!
you: My penis piercing is missing
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
:crackup:
some very good ones ~~~~
some very good ones ~~~~
Blackdragon5095
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2005
- Messages
- 453
- Reaction score
- 6
I have to say, this is 1 of the meanest stuff a guy could say to a girl. 
Very funny too :crackup:
Maybe this will end up in the archive :cheer:
Ketp the posts coming
Very funny too :crackup:
Maybe this will end up in the archive :cheer:
Ketp the posts coming
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
LMFAO!!!
Her: That was great
Me: Yeah until you started snorting like a pig
Her: That was so amazing
Me: Just wait until I upload the footage to the internet
Her: Your are so incredible!
Me: *checks off notepad* Number 63 This week
Her: How was it?
Me: You **** like hellen keller
Rebound Material
Master Don Juan
HER: Was it good for you?
ME: you happen to play world of warcraft? cuz you surely werent WOW.(nerds will get this one =P)
ME: you happen to play world of warcraft? cuz you surely werent WOW.(nerds will get this one =P)
Dannyrt34
Master Don Juan
Things NOT to say after sex.
"Did I mention the video camera?"
"Aw hell baby, a little rug burn never hurt anybody."
"Do you accept visa?"
"And to think I was really trying to pick up your friend!"
"Gee I hope you still look good when I'm sober."
"SMILE! You're on candid camera."
"I thought YOU had the keys to the handcuffs!"
"Wow baby you're good enough to do this for a living!"
"Are you sure I don't know you from somewhere?"
"That leak better be from the waterbed."
"Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed?"
"Is that you? Or is your mattress stuffed with rotten potatoes?"
"It sure is nice being in bed with a woman I don't have to inflate or blow up."
"Wow you're almost as good as my ex."
"I really hate women who actually think sex MEANS something."
"Have you seen FATAL ATTRACTION?"
"Sorry about the nametags, I'm bad with names."
"You mean you're NOT my blind date???"
"Did I mention the video camera?"
"Aw hell baby, a little rug burn never hurt anybody."
"Do you accept visa?"
"And to think I was really trying to pick up your friend!"
"Gee I hope you still look good when I'm sober."
"SMILE! You're on candid camera."
"I thought YOU had the keys to the handcuffs!"
"Wow baby you're good enough to do this for a living!"
"Are you sure I don't know you from somewhere?"
"That leak better be from the waterbed."
"Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed?"
"Is that you? Or is your mattress stuffed with rotten potatoes?"
"It sure is nice being in bed with a woman I don't have to inflate or blow up."
"Wow you're almost as good as my ex."
"I really hate women who actually think sex MEANS something."
"Have you seen FATAL ATTRACTION?"
"Sorry about the nametags, I'm bad with names."
"You mean you're NOT my blind date???"
Blackdragon5095
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2005
- Messages
- 453
- Reaction score
- 6
"Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed?"
LMAO !!!! :crackup:
LMAO !!!! :crackup:
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Nzo
Don Juan
I vote Archive material
DaPainkillah
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jun 2, 2006
- Messages
- 12
- Reaction score
- 2
Dannyrt34 said:
AWESOME!!!