The *No Contact* Challenge! ( Read this if you just got dumped)

[scarface701]

So I’m starting day 1 today. I’ve done NC with this same woman multiple times and she always ends up writing to me IMY messages or I’m sorry or whatever it is. It’s been four years now that we’ve been going back and forth like this. We’ve both moved on in other relationships. But... It seems it’s about every 6 months or so one of us will reach out. What bothers me the most is that every time we interact it ends with her being a complete ass. She’s younger than I am and so I just chalk it up to immaturity.... but to be honest it bothers me. Recently I reached out to her to say happy bday after NC for 45 days or so... and she will only interact via her twitter page. After going back and forth I just called her out and said this isn’t worth my time you either email or text back or we don’t communicate. She then tweeted some rude **** about how great her bf is and how terrible I am.... I wrote back and just said WTF I’m literally just trying to be nice and not always have stuff end badly between us. It’s been 4 years and it would be nice to just end things in a civil manner. However, she won’t allow that... so I told her she’d heard the last from me and it’s best if we forget each other. Today is day 1. I’ve never understood why women want to keep the conflict going??? I do care about her but I’m more upset that she won’t just let the conflict die. I’ve never dated a woman that I couldn’t reach out to 6 months or 1 year later and just say hey how are things hope all is well and have them say the same thing back. It’s weird that this woman wants to keep the conflict going. Not sure what that’s about....?

 

[bcude]

So I’m starting day 1 today. I’ve done NC with this same woman multiple times and she always ends up writing to me IMY messages or I’m sorry or whatever it is. It’s been four years now that we’ve been going back and forth like this. We’ve both moved on in other relationships. But... It seems it’s about every 6 months or so one of us will reach out. What bothers me the most is that every time we interact it ends with her being a complete ass. She’s younger than I am and so I just chalk it up to immaturity.... but to be honest it bothers me. Recently I reached out to her to say happy bday after NC for 45 days or so... and she will only interact via her twitter page. After going back and forth I just called her out and said this isn’t worth my time you either email or text back or we don’t communicate. She then tweeted some rude **** about how great her bf is and how terrible I am.... I wrote back and just said WTF I’m literally just trying to be nice and not always have stuff end badly between us. It’s been 4 years and it would be nice to just end things in a civil manner. However, she won’t allow that... so I told her she’d heard the last from me and it’s best if we forget each other. Today is day 1. I’ve never understood why women want to keep the conflict going??? I do care about her but I’m more upset that she won’t just let the conflict die. I’ve never dated a woman that I couldn’t reach out to 6 months or 1 year later and just say hey how are things hope all is well and have them say the same thing back. It’s weird that this woman wants to keep the conflict going. Not sure what that’s about....?

Welcome to the forum.
When you’re arguing with her, you’re playing her game at that point, a game she is biologically designed to win and you are not. Women love attention in all forms, positive or negative doesn't matter. You're feeding the fire, and it looks like kindergarten they way you two interact.
Do yourself a big favor and cut this trashy woman out of your life completely and have your peace of mind.
Then focus on evolving as a man and better women, you will be happier for it. Stay strong soldier.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

I understand how important it is to remain no contact.
As in, I do not reach out to them.

I have not now for over 9 weeks. Not a peep. Email. Text. Nothing.
Starting to forget what their voice sounds like.That was at the end of January I last heard their voice.
It was Jan 2 I last saw them in person not knowing it would be the last.
This has been a long 5 months with many eventful things and changes in my life.
Mostly more positive than when I was with them, tbh.

I'm trying to hang out at another forum, not love life related, to get perspective. My new social circle I started last week has put electricity back into my veins. It's sporty and outdoors with fit, positive people.

I am crushing my new work position and flourishing with paying down debt.



There's still several times a day that are acutely painful.
I wonder if it just takes longer to get over them when you're past your mid-forties?

 

[Lynx nkaf]

I can relate man. I'm 3 months in and still get waves of pain on a daily basis. I was blocked everywhere, which does make No Contact a lot easier. When all avenues of communication are closed off, then there's no choice but to move forward.

I still fantasise about her reaching out to me, out of the blue. My hope comes from the fact that I know it is genuinely hard for women to find good quality men these days. The reality is our ex's will have to date around for a while and have some bad experiences before they potentially become motivated to get back in contact with us....but this is a gamble and it may take a long time.

Our best option is to genuinely move on, so that if our ex's ever get back in touch then we are free from emotion and can coolly seduce them back into our orbit.

You don't want seconds man, don't dip into that garbage.

Facts are: they actually went past our boundary limits.

We deserve to declare that our best lifestyle awaits us and awaits our crushed and grinded out satisfied selfactualisation goals.

There is to be no platespinning/orbiting of exes.

I get it.
Its an impossibility that your ex becomes what you need, never mind what you want.
In my case particularly,
there should have been more action and less words I received from them.

If there's no action, their words are meaningless.

Also, I absolutely will pay for a private investigator before having sex with the next partner. I'm too sensitive/romantic/Disney not to protect myself this way.

 

[Robert28]

I can relate man. I'm 3 months in and still get waves of pain on a daily basis. I was blocked everywhere, which does make No Contact a lot easier. When all avenues of communication are closed off, then there's no choice but to move forward.

I still fantasise about her reaching out to me, out of the blue. My hope comes from the fact that I know it is genuinely hard for women to find good quality men these days. The reality is our ex's will have to date around for a while and have some bad experiences before they potentially become motivated to get back in contact with us....but this is a gamble and it may take a long time.

Our best option is to genuinely move on, so that if our ex's ever get back in touch then we are free from emotion and can coolly seduce them back into our orbit.

Women finding good men isn’t that hard. What’s hard is they get the tingles for the men that aren’t good and then whine about it. Most women have several chances at a decent guy but they sabatoge it or pass it over.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

I think it depends on how good the relationship was. Rather, how good YOU felt it was. If YOU felt it was really good, it hurts more and takes longer to get over

I wouldn't be typing these words on Sosuave right now if he hadn't taught me/exposed me to the concept of the red pill(wouldn't have seen Rational Male listed in a recommended booklist...wouldn't have seen mention of Sosuave in the book...actually, probably would still be with him if he hadn't taught me this stuff).
I know he realised that too late, but it didn't matter because I don't want or even like kids/babysitting and he wanted to impregnate so....here is what happens.


I sincerely hope he found what he needs and I do actually still google his name for obituaries(the covid pandemic...he had a constant, nagging smoker's cough ..he might have caught this) Nope. No obituary. So I am warm with genuine deference when I write that I hope he is happy.

 

[soulforge]

My "No Contact" journey.

I was in a 2 year relationship with what I'd have to call a "unicorn" - young (22, I was 30 when I met her), intelligent, beautiful and somewhat virginal. I was in my prime Game when I met her. I was super confident and getting regular sex from different women. I wasn't in the mindset for monogamy, but I was in-between jobs and figured getting a nice GF might be a good idea while I get my career back on track.

It worked really well. Having a GF allowed me to concentrate more on my work, without the persistent distractions of sex with new women. My new GF was also a complete love slave. Utterly devoted.

I began to settle....but not for long. Eventually, I began to itch for my old life and started meeting other women again behind my GF's back. I orchestrated this through dating apps.

She caught me several times messaging women. I had lazy passcodes on my phone (1st pastcode was 121212, second passcode was 982198). The final time she caught me was by far the worst. She found videos that I had taken of me pounding another woman on our bed. I suppose it's quite unforgiveable. She tried to break up with me, but she kept coming back. She stayed with me for another year, and I made sure that she didn't catch me cheating again. I did continue to cheat, but it felt bitter. I wasn't proud of myself, but it felt like I had to hedge against my now weak position in the relationship. I wanted to keep 2 in the kitty in case she decided to leave me. I sensed that my relationship was in imminent danger. She tried to pull the rug, unsuccessfully, several times over the course of the final year of our relationship.

My relationship with her finally ended on March 14, 2020. She had gradually begun distancing over the final year of our relationship - I figured she had decided there was no future, and she'd lost trust and respect for me. I'd also started smoking a lot of weed and had somewhat "checked out" emotionally. I was hurt by the obvious deterioration of the relationship and I felt powerless to stop it - It felt like too much effort. What made this period of decline harder was that there were great moments with her interspersed. Still lots of sex, great little weekends together and I still saw her most days.

I eventually got sick of the instability. I decided to smoke her out. We had a fight about it and I dared her to leave me.... and she left in tears. It was a bad fight and I'm not proud to say that I definitely scared her with my anger. She called me for the next 2 days and I ignored her - I felt in a strong position at this point. I figured I'd taught her a lesson and she'd come crawling back - submissive again.

After a week I decided I wanted her back, and she had been radio silent for 5 days. I called her and I discovered I was blocked everywhere. I spent the next week trying to get around the block. I made all the mistakes and lowered my value by trying to contact her - I never begged, but I did try hard to establish dialogue. I got blanket-blocked everywhere (Facebook, Whatsapp etc). I was completely cut off without a word.

About 2 weeks after the breakup, I went to her apartment and buzzed her intercom. She answered and told me through the intercom that she was seeing a therapist about me and she didn't feel safe seeing me. She said she didn't want the relationship to continue. I was relaxed and calm during the chat - again, no begging.

I then went into No Contact for almost 60 days. Still blocked, and still not a word from her.

After the No Contact period I realised I still wanted her. I decided to take a gamble.

I sent her a "clean slate" message on LinkedIn (the only place I wasn't blocked). Nothing beggy or needy in the message, just an acknowledgment of mistakes I had made and some cheeky/funny/relaxed comments about a big, new apartment that I have procured in a nice area of the city. I also told her to look after my shirts (that she still has).

No reply to my LinkedIn message and it's been a week. I don't think she's even opened the message.

From here I'm going indefinite No Contact and I'm going to try and move on. Part of me hopes that I'll see her again one day.

I've learned a lot from this experience. I've never been dumped before, so it was something I really struggled with. Huge ego hit. I spent a long time in denial, thinking that if I could just talk to her then I'd be able to seduce her.

It took months for me to accept that the severed connection was real.

I'm rebuilding now - reading all the old Game stuff that has helped me so much over the years (Heartiste, Rollo, Todd V).

I could never relate to friends in the past that got hung up on girls that dumped them. I can understand and relate to it now, even though my situation is different and I deserved to get dumped for frequent cheating and being emotionally neglectful.

Thanks for reading!

Sounds like she is staying away from you and seeking therapy because you mentally screwed her over.

I don't blame her for blocking you.. She is much better off without you.

Your ego took a hit, that is the only reason why you are chasing.

 

[scarface701]

Sounds like she is staying away from you and seeking therapy because you mentally screwed her over.

I don't blame her for blocking you.. She is much better off without you.

Your ego took a hit, that is the only reason why you are chasing.

IMHO it is the ego hits that can be the hardest. I still think about this woman that totally dumped on my ego. I was older than her 30 vs 20. I had everything going for me in my life, good looking, physician, owned my own business, pretty much just doing well all around. I don’t know what it was but I just instantly clicked with this woman. She felt the same way but I knew she had a bf she was on and off with but TBH he was a gang banger with tats on his face, drug dealer, lived in a studio apartment in the ghetto where they did drugs all the time....that type...and so I didn’t even think it was a competition. Clearly it was an easy decision. I was the clear winner.

NOPE! After dating her for a month she... said I still love him and I’m not ready to give up on that relationship. I think she felt that he was wounded and needed her help and she felt too guilty to leave him rotting in the ghetto. It totally crushed me. LT I know I’m better without her... but still it was a hit.

 

[scarface701]

Ah F I totally want to contact this woman today. I won’t but... uugghhhhh she plays these mind games that f me up.

I can’t get her away from this guy that she is so much better than but she sees him as her first love.... not sure what’s with women and hanging on to that “first” relationship. Anyway she plays these games with me which I know are just to see if I’m still here as I think she sees me as a backup plan which would never happen... despite how crazy I am about her. It sucks to have someone you care about so much f things up to the point that no matter what happens you can’t be with them and have any respect for yourself.

 

[scarface701]

You need to separate yourself from 99% of other men who are needy betas and pursue women who reject them. If you calmly disconnect then it will leave a lasting impression on her. Female Ego responds best to mystery. No Contact is the best way to at least allow her to wonder what you're up to.

No Contact may not work to the extent that she reaches out to you at some point, but at least you will leave her with the impression of non-needy, outcome independent aloof alpha (if you didn't over pursue when the relationship ended). This is the best frame to leave the relationship. We all **** up and over pursue in the immediate aftermath of a failed relationship....but if you can get to a point (sooner rather than later) where you go Indefinite No Contact then this is the best place to be for any hope of reconciliation further down the line.

I definitely understand where you’re coming from... Our situation was this... we worked together and got close... she was really close with me and my daughter. I was unhappily married so I decided to move out and she said she was in a relationship that wasn’t great. So I moved out and she started coming over all the time. Things proceeded fairly quickly as we basically already knew each other. However, about 4 weeks in she started getting distant and I eventually found out (not from her) that she was hanging out with her ex again. I always knew there was a chance for this. I didn’t think she’d try to hide it from me.
The part that bothers me is when she quit she had a box of items to return to work and instead of facing me she left the box with a business in our building and never came in to say goodbye or anything.

I was pissed at this time... and my wife was trying pretty hard to get me back so I went back and worked on my marriage.

that was 4 years ago... to this day this woman reaches out to me either via email with IMY emails. Or sorry emails. Literally one word emails. If I wait a day or two and reply trying to address the elephant (that she still has feelings for me and we never got closure) in the room I’m ghosted.... every time. Or she’ll turn into an ass and say how she’s going to go suck her BFs ****.

it’s confusing to me... in one hand she sends me an IMY email and then turns around with this other BS. I’m over here just honestly trying to be a friend and say all is forgiven and hope all is well. She’ll never allow any closure BC she knows it bothers me that she just vanished without a word. I never understand why she feels the need to be an ass...? Makes no sense. I’m never going to get back with her.

IDK if she’s upset that she didn’t make it work... or what her deal is...it’s just weird to get IMY emails on and off over a 4 year period and the person sending them never engages with you.....? I’ve literally tried everything with this woman. NC. Trying to talk to her. Etc...etc...etc.... nothing seems to work. It’s just leaves me scratching my head.

 

[Robert28]

I definitely understand where you’re coming from... Our situation was this... we worked together and got close... she was really close with me and my daughter. I was unhappily married so I decided to move out and she said she was in a relationship that wasn’t great. So I moved out and she started coming over all the time. Things proceeded fairly quickly as we basically already knew each other. However, about 4 weeks in she started getting distant and I eventually found out (not from her) that she was hanging out with her ex again. I always knew there was a chance for this. I didn’t think she’d try to hide it from me.
The part that bothers me is when she quit she had a box of items to return to work and instead of facing me she left the box with a business in our building and never came in to say goodbye or anything.

I was pissed at this time... and my wife was trying pretty hard to get me back so I went back and worked on my marriage.

that was 4 years ago... to this day this woman reaches out to me either via email with IMY emails. Or sorry emails. Literally one word emails. If I wait a day or two and reply trying to address the elephant (that she still has feelings for me and we never got closure) in the room I’m ghosted.... every time. Or she’ll turn into an ass and say how she’s going to go suck her BFs ****.

it’s confusing to me... in one hand she sends me an IMY email and then turns around with this other BS. I’m over here just honestly trying to be a friend and say all is forgiven and hope all is well. She’ll never allow any closure BC she knows it bothers me that she just vanished without a word. I never understand why she feels the need to be an ass...? Makes no sense. I’m never going to get back with her.

IDK if she’s upset that she didn’t make it work... or what her deal is...it’s just weird to get IMY emails on and off over a 4 year period and the person sending them never engages with you.....? I’ve literally tried everything with this woman. NC. Trying to talk to her. Etc...etc...etc.... nothing seems to work. It’s just leaves me scratching my head.

I can give you some closure and I don’t even know her. She’s a narcissist. Probably borderline personality disorder too, but for sure she’s a narcissist. What she’s doing with the emails is called hoovering. Your response gives her fuel that she’s craving, that’s why she doesn’t respond or turns into a jerk. She’s always going to keep coming back to get more fuel until you put a stop to it by blocking her from everywhere. She’s never going to reconcile with you, she’s never going to meet up with you and have some long talk like in the movies, this is classic narcissism.

 

[scarface701]

I can give you some closure and I don’t even know her. She’s a narcissist. Probably borderline personality disorder too, but for sure she’s a narcissist. What she’s doing with the emails is called hoovering. Your response gives her fuel that she’s craving, that’s why she doesn’t respond or turns into a jerk. She’s always going to keep coming back to get more fuel until you put a stop to it by blocking her from everywhere. She’s never going to reconcile with you, she’s never going to meet up with you and have some long talk like in the movies, this is classic narcissism.

Oh for sure. I've come to this conclusion as well. It's just awkward as hell. It's also crazy how manipulative she is. The last time we communicated...I wouldn't call it "talking" as she rarely engages at all... but it was before her bday and she made it clear that she wanted this glass artwork type bong for her bday.... anyway... this "communication" eventually ended with me saying... "this is totally pointless. I'm a busy doctor and don't have time for your games. If you're not interested in communicating as normal people do (she only communicates on Twitter) and if we are never going to see each other than I have no need to talk to you again. All the best".... and I haven't and won't reach out again to her nor will I respond if she reaches out.

I laugh though how all of a sudden her Twitter is full of these glass bongs that she wants. Before that, she was writing how she's planning on going to nursing school. Next it will be something how she is sick and I know it's all an attempt to get me to reach out and say..."I'll buy that bong for you"... or "oh great you're going to nursing school".... or "Oh you're sick, I'd be happy to help".... then she'd just ghost me. LMAO.

 

[Zontyy]

It's been 4 and 1/2 months since we broke up, she monkey branch back to an ex husband. The sex was amazing but she was starting to get disrespectful and I put her in her place which she didn't like and monkey branch back to her ex who she divorced to be with me. She tried to commit suicide 3 weeks after the breakup I was only notified because I was still on the call list at the time. She blocked me on everything for first 2 months. Then unblocked me on facebook and liked a photo of mine in the middle of the night. I can only assume she looks at my facebook while her ex husband is away at work. Just like week recommend friends at on instagram it looks like she unblocked me on instagram. I know I should have but I looked at her instagram, she went and made it public I think she wanted me to see everything.

Apparently she is on some 2 month vacation in europe and north africa with her 2 year old son that her husband is paying for while he stay back in the states and works. 90% of her posts are about being a happy family and so happy she is with her ex husband. It is all bull**** and lies and I can see that, I feel sorry for her. I know she depressed I see it in some of her photos, she is not smiling. Apparently she also made her facebook public aswell I assume because she wants me to see it. Deep down I know she will contact me in the future after the money runs out or she gets into another fight with her ex husband. I'm just so far gone and have my own problems never a chance between us ever again.

Since then though I got an EX (before the last one) of mine pregnant and have been having an on again off again thing going. She finally just shut me down saying she isn't attracted and there is no spark and we are just friends having a baby. I decided to take a job a couple hours away and she is losing her mind melting down.

This is my post above I just lost the logon details to the account but figure this will be my new account and want to post a status update.

My Ex contacted me and she face timed me one night from Morocco. She wanted to forget the past and to start over again and just love me again. Told me how she thinks about me nonstop and never let go of the idea of being together. Told me she wanted to come back to US and marry me etc etc etc. I was pretty standoffish and held my feelings in. She made some comments about lots of girls commenting on my profile and how she said I was trying to replace her. I laughed it off and said no one can replace anyone because we are all unique. Anyways she came on really strong and wanted me to go see her in morocco. I missed the sex so I agreed to see her if and when I had the time and money. She then went and offered to buy me plane tickets to Morocco I can only assume she taking money from her husband to pay for this. I said sure and she bought me some tickets right before Ramadan. The idea was to spend 3 weeks together have some great sex and lots of fun in Marrakech a city away from her parents who she is visiting before holy month. COVID happened and they Royal Air Maroc sent me some ticket vouchers. She called me a few times back to back during then asked if I had been with anyone and I told her yes my other ex who I got pregnant. She was quite hurt by that but I told her she left not that its any of her business. She then wanted to point out that she never slept with her ex husband since returning to him and hasn't been with him or anyone. (I'm calling bull****)

Anyways the spark has kind of died down with her and I could feel her depression coming in waves while she is in morocco. She is not the same girl who would pine over me and care so much about me. You can tell when a girl is your complete focus and I feel like some sort of backup plan. She would contact me once a week just to see how i was doing. While talking to her this week she had some idea that I was going to leave my country and live with her and be in Morocco like I would leave my soon to be son. It was at this moment I decided told her we shouldn't speak or message each other anymore. I was getting invested in her and she wasn't with me. I then said when the flights and the borders open, I'll send her a message and make plans to meet. She did the most lightning quick reply of OK and gave me an inshallah. I still plan to see her and have a few weeks of some fun but it doesn't work out I'm still using these free tickets and there plenty of other Moroccan girls that hit me up on facebook who are friendly and offer to show me around their cities.

Now onto the Ex I got pregnant, we meet up and take walks and have talked about child custody and support. She agreed to sign some paperwork after the kid is born for joint custody with alternating primary residence. This should in effect make it so I won't be paying child support. Also prepared some IRS paperwork and every other year we will claim our son as a dependent. It almost seems too good to be true but I'm praying she doesn't back out on this or else we will be in court right after this kid is born. I have 2 best lawyers in the county already ready if it does happen. If she does follow through and sign and file all this after the kid is born, I will be very happy. I'll even help her out and give some money under the table to help with my son and her university just for the peace of mind she gave me time will tell. I also am getting the vibe that she interested in some longterm FWB. She wants to go book a hotel room for the weekend at a winery and I already know what that means. She just bought me some clothes too because she wants to see me in more variety.

I'm a bit hurt though, by the Arab girl because with her husband she was willing to leave everything behind to be with him. Yet she wants me to leave everything behind to be with her since this change of heart. I feel like if she really loved me she would be pushing to be with me again here in the USA. I feel unloved and I put my heart and well everything into her.

I tell myself that there are plenty of women hitting you up right now that you blown off or ignored. Also you've dropped weight put on muscle, got a better job. This month I finally became credit card debt free and by end of the year have no debts at all. I have a son being born withing the next 7 days, Yet this **** with the arab girl still bothers me. I mean I loved her so much, it comes and goes you know? Like during a quiet run or walk it pops into my head.

 

[bcude]

Not looking for advice, just taking the opportunity to vent a little since this is the place for it.
The ex that made me find this site and swallow the red pill really did a real number on me emotionally when she left me. She made me question everything about myself and think about life on so many levels while leaving me in the harshest of ways with feelings of guilt. I still suffer from all this on some level since i take my time to write about it but I see it as a blessing and feel it was necessary for my growth as a man. She pushed me HARD for a child and marriage but i naturally hesitated until she was fed up and left. In all fairness i generally handled myself weakly so i don't blame her for leaving.

Now yesterday out of the blue i see a random picture of her where she's pregnant about 6 months in and it just completely blew my mind.
You read about baby rabies but you can't really understand it until you see it for yourself. As i see it she must have taken the first best available guy to have a child with, in other words a stranger as she can't have been seeing him more than about 3 months (maximum 6, but probably much less since you wont get pregnant on the first try while they still found themselves in the infatuation stage.

Adding to the world of single mothers and habitual bad decisions. Sadness is what i feel, since i know this child will not grow into a stable happy family that she really craved and i know it's just a question of when she will ultimately divorce or leave this poor fellow. Let me spare you the details to why i feel certain about that but let's just say she most probably put up an ultimatum literally from day 1 as the foundation of their relationship, and he accepted.

Anyway, what shocked me is what she wrote as header to the picture. It was basically a quote from a picture i put up 1 year ago just after we split. On my birthday i posted a picture having fun where another cute girl could be seen and easily be taken for a new gf of mine. I can't see it in any other way than i got under her skin/she's bitter and sent me a subtle hint to get back at me in a manner of "hey! look at me, i'm living life preggo and you're missing out". This after dropping another subtle hint on our annivarsary day last summer where i could sense some struggling from her side.
The odds of her using that quote as a coincidence would just be too weird. It's so fvcked up that she puts in the effort to send me a subtle message while pregnant and being with a new man over 1 year later. I shouldn't be in her mind at all, but knowing her excellent memory and over analysing everything it somehow doesn't surprise me that she can't lose the feeling that she let a genuinely good man go.
A feeling she has to live with. I wish her nothing but the best, but the bad unresponsible decisions of women are just unfathomable to grasp. As i've said before, the more i get to learn about women, the more i realise the urgent need for masculine leadership and guidance.
My mother turned into a mess after she left my father. Complete self destruction.

*Note, she called me once a couple of months after the breakup where we had a friendly brief talk and then she liked a fb post of mine a couple of months later while being with the new man which i've learned now (i post something every 3 years, basically never). Besides that complete radio silence.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Not looking for advice, just taking the opportunity to vent a little since this is the place for it.
The ex that made me find this site and swallow the red pill really did a real number on me emotionally when she left me. She made me question everything about myself and think about life on so many levels while leaving me in the harshest of ways with feelings of guilt. I still suffer from all this on some level since i take my time to write about it but I see it as a blessing and feel it was necessary for my growth as a man. She pushed me HARD for a child and marriage but i naturally hesitated until she was fed up and left. In all fairness i generally handled myself weakly so i don't blame her for leaving.

Now yesterday out of the blue i see a random picture of her where she's pregnant about 6 months in and it just completely blew my mind.
You read about baby rabies but you can't really understand it until you see it for yourself. As i see it she must have taken the first best available guy to have a child with, in other words a stranger as she can't have been seeing him more than about 3 months (maximum 6, but probably much less since you wont get pregnant on the first try while they still found themselves in the infatuation stage.

Adding to the world of single mothers and habitual bad decisions. Sadness is what i feel, since i know this child will not grow into a stable happy family that she really craved and i know it's just a question of when she will ultimately divorce or leave this poor fellow. Let me spare you the details to why i feel certain about that but let's just say she most probably put up an ultimatum literally from day 1 as the foundation of their relationship, and he accepted.

Anyway, what shocked me is what she wrote as header to the picture. It was basically a quote from a picture i put up 1 year ago just after we split. On my birthday i posted a picture having fun where another cute girl could be seen and easily be taken for a new gf of mine. I can't see it in any other way than i got under her skin/she's bitter and sent me a subtle hint to get back at me in a manner of "hey! look at me, i'm living life preggo and you're missing out". This after dropping another subtle hint on our annivarsary day last summer where i could sense some struggling from her side.
The odds of her using that quote as a coincidence would just be too weird. It's so fvcked up that she puts in the effort to send me a subtle message while pregnant and being with a new man over 1 year later. I shouldn't be in her mind at all, but knowing her excellent memory and over analysing everything it somehow doesn't surprise me that she can't lose the feeling that she let a genuinely good man go.
A feeling she has to live with. I wish her nothing but the best, but the bad unresponsible decisions of women are just unfathomable to grasp. As i've said before, the more i get to learn about women, the more i realise the urgent need for masculine leadership and guidance.
My mother turned into a mess after she left my father. Complete self destruction.

*Note, she called me once a couple of months after the breakup where we had a friendly brief talk and then she liked a fb post of mine a couple of months later while being with the new man which i've learned now (i post something every 3 years, basically never). Besides that complete radio silence.

Smfh, what a cvnt.

Big virtual hug to you man. You've made me feel better with some advice on this thread and right now I'm fvckin speechless mad/sad for you.

 

[Robert28]

Not looking for advice, just taking the opportunity to vent a little since this is the place for it.
The ex that made me find this site and swallow the red pill really did a real number on me emotionally when she left me. She made me question everything about myself and think about life on so many levels while leaving me in the harshest of ways with feelings of guilt. I still suffer from all this on some level since i take my time to write about it but I see it as a blessing and feel it was necessary for my growth as a man. She pushed me HARD for a child and marriage but i naturally hesitated until she was fed up and left. In all fairness i generally handled myself weakly so i don't blame her for leaving.

Now yesterday out of the blue i see a random picture of her where she's pregnant about 6 months in and it just completely blew my mind.
You read about baby rabies but you can't really understand it until you see it for yourself. As i see it she must have taken the first best available guy to have a child with, in other words a stranger as she can't have been seeing him more than about 3 months (maximum 6, but probably much less since you wont get pregnant on the first try while they still found themselves in the infatuation stage.

Adding to the world of single mothers and habitual bad decisions. Sadness is what i feel, since i know this child will not grow into a stable happy family that she really craved and i know it's just a question of when she will ultimately divorce or leave this poor fellow. Let me spare you the details to why i feel certain about that but let's just say she most probably put up an ultimatum literally from day 1 as the foundation of their relationship, and he accepted.

Anyway, what shocked me is what she wrote as header to the picture. It was basically a quote from a picture i put up 1 year ago just after we split. On my birthday i posted a picture having fun where another cute girl could be seen and easily be taken for a new gf of mine. I can't see it in any other way than i got under her skin/she's bitter and sent me a subtle hint to get back at me in a manner of "hey! look at me, i'm living life preggo and you're missing out". This after dropping another subtle hint on our annivarsary day last summer where i could sense some struggling from her side.
The odds of her using that quote as a coincidence would just be too weird. It's so fvcked up that she puts in the effort to send me a subtle message while pregnant and being with a new man over 1 year later. I shouldn't be in her mind at all, but knowing her excellent memory and over analysing everything it somehow doesn't surprise me that she can't lose the feeling that she let a genuinely good man go.
A feeling she has to live with. I wish her nothing but the best, but the bad unresponsible decisions of women are just unfathomable to grasp. As i've said before, the more i get to learn about women, the more i realise the urgent need for masculine leadership and guidance.
My mother turned into a mess after she left my father. Complete self destruction.

*Note, she called me once a couple of months after the breakup where we had a friendly brief talk and then she liked a fb post of mine a couple of months later while being with the new man which i've learned now (i post something every 3 years, basically never). Besides that complete radio silence.

What’s the guy look like? Does she even post pics of them together?

 

[Robert28]

I have been dumped in the worst ways you could imagine. Awhile back I bumped into my ex girlfriends mom at a shopping center. Her mom said how my ex still talks about me, how they all miss me and how me ex keeps saying she wishes could feel something for me but she just can’t. But she knows I would be the perfect husband.
Ouch.lol

 

[NSX-R]

Been in NC since 23rd of April. Actually it was 1 and a half month longer but she Send me some wishes for my nameday which i replied 40 hours later saying “thank you “ and that’s all . Since then been with 5 females (banged them the last 2 weeks) . Yesterday for some reason a saw her on my dream and thought about her . I checked her account from a profile that a friend of mine has ( cause we don’t follow each other on instagram) and she uploaded a story with a sightseeing with 2 of her female friends and their bf Tagged and another dude as it seems to be her new bf . He might not be the new bf ,I’m not sure but it seems weird for just a dude to be around there with 2 couples so it’s very probable . Anyway, it was expected this to happen but for some reason i got really furious . So i went and hit the gym and released all of my anger . Other than that he’s not better looking than me , most likely not as rich as i am so this calms me even more for some reason again .I thought for a long time i was over her but unfortunately there is still something down there burning for her .

 

[bcude]

What’s the guy look like? Does she even post pics of them together?

That's something i wonder too and did some digging out of curiosity but found literally zero information, which surprises me. Nothing of the usual hearts, comments or pics which makes me think he doesn't have social media honestly. She didn't post any pics of us either but atleast she dropped some covert hints. I've started to decipher women's way of communication in that way, but here.. nothing. The only thing i noticed is that her social media presence went down completely and then this.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

That's something i wonder too and did some digging out of curiosity but found literally zero information, which surprises me. Nothing of the usual hearts, comments or pics which makes me think he doesn't have social media honestly. She didn't post any pics of us either but atleast she dropped some covert hints. I've started to decipher women's way of communication in that way, but here.. nothing. The only thing i noticed is that her social media presence went down completely and then this.

maybe stay off it, don't expose yourself to this, I can't stand this woman-I get the baby rabies but come on.....