The "Just Got Dumped" GUIDE

[parkthebus]

You were wrong to confront her but not for moral reasons. For the most part, you can't critisize the way a woman treats you. You can only manipulate them to change their behaviour and that has to be done subtlety. You would have been better off giving her less attention when she bloes you off or going no contact for a few days. Women generally don't look at things from the point of view that they should change their behaviour to benefit you. They will change their behaviour if you make it so that it benefits them. Again, like a child. You have to have the power to punish or you can withdraw reward. But this girl ain't for you mate.

 

[Shugo]

Thank you very much lm beginning to see the picture now l totally understand and agree

 

[Shugo]

I typically understand. I'm grateful for your help. Although l never imagined it to be so painful l now understand that love does hurt a lot. With your help lm getting a clear picture of how this world of the heart tends to operate. Thank you all

 

[kennyken]

Hi guys long time lurker.

I know its an old post but I tried no contact with a woman but lasted 3 days.

She said it was easier for her to move on from me In these 3 days as i wasn't in her mind so much

Shes got another boyfriend of about 2 months now and I'm scared if I do a full no contact period she will move on and get over me

We was on and off for about 10 years and have a child together so full no contact is impossible.

She said we should be friends

Please help

 

[kennyken]

She's manipulating you and using reverse psychology on you. Get a new gf

I want her back though. Should I go no contact?

 

[Von]

Great stuff as a reminder in situation where the girl wants to friendzone (and you don't want) or dump you.....

Wish I had a story to share.... however all I have is this girl (a oneitis).... who seeks to friendzone me.... than after 2 weeks NC she explose my phone to ask my ''professionnal'' advice (she called 6 times, text 5 times, asking for a meetup) ... when I was going to an event where she would be.... she exploded my phone to go together. (remember she friendzoned).... the rest is just a going down in flame.

However, I noticed.... if you NC a girl you meet and took her number, she might have been interested or not and than you hit her up a couple of months later... you can get a date

 

[AllDay85]

I want her back though. Should I go no contact?

Of course, but it's already too late bud. You're in denial, and seeking validation from her. The fact she's getting harpooned by another guy hurts your ego. Understand these proccesses at work and also realize theres billions of women out there bud.

 

[kennyken]

We have shared a kiss lots of times and she told Me she loves me and wants to be with with me. Just has feelings for someone else

 

[J-Rod]

Great friggin read!!
I was dating a girl for roughly four months, it was a long distance relationship I'll add. We talked all the time over two months before seeing each other and fell in love. she flew here in February and I flew to her in March. Met all her family when there and they loved me! they told her Im a keeper! So the week after I get back she breaks up with me. She says " I love you and your ****in perfect but Im not perfect for you." She added "something happened three weeks ago that brought allot of pain forward and I cant deal with it right now." So instead of letting me in and provide support she turned tail and ran. She also stated it had nothing to do with another guy or girl, which I do believe. ( sure call me a fool but I do trust her). The event she was referring to three weeks ago could be her bio mom getting involved and messaging me over FB to tell me how happy her daughter was now she had me. The ex took HUGE offence to this and told me her bio mom gets involved in her relationships and then they go bad. The ex also said "a partner does not make you happy, you make you happy." which I agree to on some level. I was a little perturbed at the break up and told her I was a fool and saw this coming for some reason. We parted ways and I haven't spoken to her at all. She wished me well on my Bday and I thanked her, sweet and simple. I dont talk to her at all and dont plan on since she needed her "space and time" to figure things out. Tell me why I even consider having her back in my life? She seems like she has ALLOT of personal issues shes been running from for far to long. I care allot about her however is a woman like this worth my time?

 

[Cem]

I am in a similar situation as well. And mine was a long distance relationship too. After 5 months, she decided to go back to her abusive, violent ex husband. Yes she was divorced eight months ago. But it felt so natural that I had began to feel that we were in the beginning ıf something real. I hadn't felt like a transitional guy, rebound guy. Like your situation, Rod, I received the warning three weeks before the end: mixed feelings, hesitations... What was a very sincere relationship began to become different, detached day by day. The thing is that I am almost sure that she didn't take this decision by herself, but it was imposed on her by her family. My first thoughts were to fly to her country and support her, motivate her about the future.. But I quickly realized that it would be a mistake.. It's so hard to distance myself from our routines, our talks, her smile and caring attitude. If I believed that she left me on her freewill, I wouldn't think about her even for a second. But my problem is that I seriously think that she was manipulated into this choice.. I can't help but think that she will eventually realize her mistake and contact me again.. Did you have any development on your situation Rod?

 

[greatsnake]

This is good stuff.

 

[Darwin]

Does this work after 6 month?

 

[Darwin]

She dumped me 6 months ago i contacted her few times ended me blocking her social media now her birthday is after 15 days im planning not to contact her again but wanna now if this strategy works after 6 months.

 

[dude99]

She dumped me 6 months ago i contacted her few times ended me blocking her social media now her birthday is after 15 days im planning not to contact her again but wanna now if this strategy works after 6 months.

It's about healing and moving on. If she hasn't been trying to contact you in 6 months chances are she has moved on.

Go meet new women and never mind an ex of 6 months ago

 

[Mr.Mac55]

This is just an amazing thread. So glad I found it. I'm just over 24 hours since being dumped after a very serious 9 month relationship with nothing more than a lame "You're too good for me....it's not you it's me" text. A TEXT of all things! I'm Day 1 in the NC challenge and while the pain is real, I'm actually looking forward to how this will go while simultaneously healing and focusing on other things.

 

[Mr.Mac55]

Wow....not even 32 hours since dumping me and she already sent me an “I miss you!” text....

Ho-Lee Sheeite

 

[dude99]

Wow....not even 32 hours since dumping me and she already sent me an “I miss you!” text....

Ho-Lee Sheeite

Ignore it. She is looking for validation. She just wants to know that you are her safety net.

Ignore it and delete it.

 

[Mr.Mac55]

Ignore it. She is looking for validation. She just wants to know that you are her safety net.

Ignore it and delete it.

I'm with ya on that. Soooo hard though. I want to engage her just because the way she dumped me was kind of weird - with a bunch of confused texts saying she doesn't know what to do and she's not sure but you deserve better then me blah blah blah. And for months and months before that text it was nothing but "I love you soooo much!!!" But I know that if I do reply, I'll just get sucked back into her same swirl of crap that will go nowhere and eventually lead me right back to where I am. I mean, I'd take her as a side chick because she's super hot and the sex was great but I dunno if that's even worth it, or possible.

 

[dude99]

I'm with ya on that. Soooo hard though. I want to engage her just because the way she dumped me was kind of weird - with a bunch of confused texts saying she doesn't know what to do and she's not sure but you deserve better then me blah blah blah. And for months and months before that text it was nothing but "I love you soooo much!!!" But I know that if I do reply, I'll just get sucked back into her same swirl of crap that will go nowhere and eventually lead me right back to where I am. I mean, I'd take her as a side chick because she's super hot and the sex was great but I dunno if that's even worth it, or possible.

Sounds like she was breaking up with you to go after another guy. Things didnt go as planned for her now she suddenly misses you. Dont fall for it. If she was all i love yous and the suddenly doesnt know what she wants then she blew it. She blew her chance with you. When you know youre the prize, you can hold your head high with confidence knowing she blew it, and you did nothing wrong,

Move on. Meet new women.

 

[Dash Riprock]

I'm with ya on that. Soooo hard though. I want to engage her just because the way she dumped me was kind of weird - with a bunch of confused texts saying she doesn't know what to do and she's not sure but you deserve better then me blah blah blah. And for months and months before that text it was nothing but "I love you soooo much!!!" But I know that if I do reply, I'll just get sucked back into her same swirl of crap that will go nowhere and eventually lead me right back to where I am. I mean, I'd take her as a side chick because she's super hot and the sex was great but I dunno if that's even worth it, or possible.

Damn, it pains me to read this, guy.

Dude, you're 42. C'mom. Man up. If you go crawling back you'll be a chump and lose all dignity. SURE she's blowing up you're phone. duh, she's a f*ucking woman and now her security blanket is gone (you). She'll keep you "warm" until someone else comes along if he hasn't already. Most women have a really hard time letting go even when they do the dumping. They need to wean off of you until their "good."

F*uck that.

Grow a pair, go NC, and focus on YOU.

IDGAF + Abundance Mentality will get you further in LIFE, personal, professional, romantic, than anything else. Remember that.

Good luck.

~Dash