That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
i can actually do 8 * 110kg with the standing calf raisesOriginally posted by Lifeforce
Good job with the squats! But I don't get your calf raises, your seated raises should be alot stronger than your standing.![]()
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
klkl, cheers double. i used to do front lateral raises actually. good excuse to go back to themOriginally posted by Double
again a deadlift record man your rushing ahead! i dont do shrugs but i have shoulder problems too, i read some stuff about the shoulder and the problem can be that the rotator muscle is too weak because it doesnt get trained with ordinary exericises: http://exrx.net/Muscles/Supraspinatus.html
i will include exericises for this muscle at the end of my workouts, lets see if it gets better.
yeah gav i started not too long ago.. ive gained a couple of kilos so far (69-72kg). my strength seems to be increasing but my im not gaining as much weight as i thought i would!? i thought if you get stronger your muscles HAVE to grow more?Originally posted by gav
Mid_au, hows it goin bud, you just started up yeh? your lifts are improvin pretty fast the now btw, whats your weight? you bulkin up yeh? [/B]
those are big gains mate, even for beginner ones. once your body adapts to the weightlifting and the heavy eating, your gains should slow down (but that's not a certainty; look at double and lifeforce)Originally posted by mid_au
yeah gav i started not too long ago.. ive gained a couple of kilos so far (69-72kg). my strength seems to be increasing but my im not gaining as much weight as i thought i would!?
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.