You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Women who are NOt good for you will tell you exactly that thru their actions.mzilla2 said:I find I have to remind myself of these lately, gotta stick with the basics:
Women who are interested in you will make themselves available to you.
Attraction is not negotiated, learned or conditioned.
Any to add?
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Is that ever true. Some years ago, I applied for a job where the boss was a nice petite brunette, HB 7.5-8. I was all dressed up and displayed my best 'smooth and confident' facade. I knew she was really attracted to me, at first. i.e. stumbled over her words, flustered, acted like a 39ish school girl.STR8UP said:1) As long as a woman who is attracted to you looks at you and sees a MAN, she will remain attracted to you. As soon as she sees you as anything less, that attraction will be GONE. FOREVER.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
True to the core. And she will always play it like she only has it once every 6 months to a year. 3 words to that: Bull - F*ckin' - Sh*t.jonwon said:Women are very highly sexed, even more so then men
That is so damn true...jonwon said:Women actively pursue men, but in covert ways
Sorry, not to thread-jack but,..I wont argue that women are more sexual than they'll ever admit, that's just part of their covert communication methodology; but it is a biological impossibility that women are more sexual than men. Men possess 17 times the amount of testosterone women do at any given time - so lets stop kidding ourselves. Catch a woman at the peak of her menstrual cycle and she's primed and ready to go; catch her at the bottom of the bell curve for that month and she'd rather curl up on the couch and watch Grey's Anatomy. Men are ready to go at a moments notice, that's just how we work.jonwon said:Women are very highly sexed, even more so then men
Oh how true. This is one thing I have trouble conveying to some of my male buddies. Some of the things they do in this regard makes me cringe. They have trouble grasping this.Rollo Tomassi said:You cannot negotiate desire. All the flowers, love songs, poetry and gifts you can muster pale in comparison to raw, spontaneous, chemical-driven desire.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Agreed, but still its good re-framing and better then the alternative most guys seem to have of:Rollo Tomassi said:Sorry, not to thread-jack but,..I wont argue that women are more sexual than they'll ever admit, that's just part of their covert communication methodology; but it is a biological impossibility that women are more sexual than men. Men possess 17 times the amount of testosterone women do at any given time - so lets stop kidding ourselves. Catch a woman at the peak of her menstrual cycle and she's primed and ready to go; catch her at the bottom of the bell curve for that month and she'd rather curl up on the couch and watch Grey's Anatomy. Men are ready to go at a moments notice, that's just how we work.
I actually think women enjoy sex more than men do though.Rollo Tomassi said:Sorry, not to thread-jack but,..I wont argue that women are more sexual than they'll ever admit, that's just part of their covert communication methodology; but it is a biological impossibility that women are more sexual than men. Men possess 17 times the amount of testosterone women do at any given time - so lets stop kidding ourselves. Catch a woman at the peak of her menstrual cycle and she's primed and ready to go; catch her at the bottom of the bell curve for that month and she'd rather curl up on the couch and watch Grey's Anatomy. Men are ready to go at a moments notice, that's just how we work.
actually i'm going to throw out a different view on this (although i could easily be wrong in what im about to say).Mr.Positive said:I actually think women enjoy sex more than men do though.
I wish I could experience that. Sex, for men, is mostly about release, releasing sexual tension that builds up.
I must say this is a great post. This post belongs in the DJ bible.. Rollo I must say, you have said some things that were money. But this statement above and the spin plates theory are one of the best on sosuave. Keep up the good work.:yes:Rollo Tomassi said:All women have the potential to be sluts, you just have to be the right Man in the right circumstance to bring it out in them. The hot coed ƒucking the young buck she met only a half an hour earlier in the foam cannon party on spring break in Cancun is the same sweet girl who'll tell you she's just not comfortable enough to have sex with you after spooning with her for 4 hour
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.