"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
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"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Augustus_McCrae
Master Don Juan
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Can we assume that you’re in a monogamous relationship? And if so, are you married?
-Augustus-
I guess for purposes of labeling, you could say it's monogamous but honestly, there's not much monogamy going on. And yes, I'm married.
not to my knowledge but anything is possible
RickTheToad
Moderator
Unwise. This can cost you plenty if she finds out. If you need some pus, you an always "hire" an escort. Just use the normal precautions. Burner cell phone, cash only, fake name, etc.
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Augustus_McCrae
Master Don Juan
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If it’s a short term marriage with no kids why not just divorce?
If it’s a long-term marriage and children are involved, my advice would be to not go there. However if you’re compelled, be smart about it. Get a burner phone thats untraceable. Do what you can to make sure that you won’t be seen by anyone. And by all means , Keep your mouth shut and never tell anyone about it.
-Augustus-
Tdawg
Don Juan
Now, if my wife was a piece of crap like my ex, I would do it in a heart beat. But my wife is like my angel that came and rescued me so can't **** it up and I have three kids I adore.
When I was travelling a lot though and in different cities it was all good. It caught up to me though and wife eventually found out. It was not a good time in our marriage and thinking back, I kind of wish I didn't do it, but it's been over 10 years so whatever. Some secrets though i'll take to my grave.
lamath
Master Don Juan
However imo when wife is not respecting you + no sex.
I say go for it
Would do what Rick says.
Also i would make my social media account as private as possible and make a new one specialy for side action, would also try to have side action as far from home as possible, when on buisness trip if possible.
If only it was short term, I'd have spun out of there a long time ago. I'm simply tired of the little to no sex and starfish. While paying for it seems a big repugnant to me, for a high end escort who does what you want and leaves, it's better than the alternative, which is regretting not using my time when I had it.
If your not getting much sex then I would say that's enough of a reason to cheat right there. A woman is supposed to please her man and it doesn't sound like your woman is pleasing you.
I've never been married but I have had a side chick before. It can be a lot of work. I was always making sure my phone was on silent when I was with one of them, had to make sure call logs/texts were deleted, and I would block the girl I wasn't with when I was with the other. There were plenty of times where I would have sex with both girls in the same day. It just got to be to much and I let the side girl go.
If your going to do this, then get a burner phone. Keep it to short flings with girls or escorts might be your best bet if your fine with paying (check out seekingarrangement.com). The longer you see the same girl on the side, the harder it becomes, and the more likely you will get caught.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
RickTheToad
Moderator
Dude, you do not pay her for sex. You pay her to leave.
Machine10033
Master Don Juan
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RickTheToad
Moderator
Epic Days
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I get it. But what is “starfish”?
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
When a woman lays on her back
Arms and legs spread and she doesn’t move. Boring to say the least
Epic Days
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Ah yes. I understand now. I call that holding sex or rationing sex within the context of a relationship.
sazc
Master Don Juan
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i.e. have you communicated your distaste, dis pleasure and lack of satisfaction and understand why she's not interested and invested?
And you're tried everything for years, at least going by ur postings.
Once a women has lost complete respect for her husband there's little to go back to.
I remembered one of the mods here (@Desdinova i think) has a guidance booklet of some sort involving having a side dish.
PM him for it.
A man like you deserves some happiness and some kindness in ur life.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
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Yes, the cheat manual. Download it here.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
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