"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Side Action
- Thread starter highSpeed
- Start date
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"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Augustus_McCrae
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2012
- Messages
- 907
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Can we assume that you’re in a monogamous relationship? And if so, are you married?
-Augustus-
I guess for purposes of labeling, you could say it's monogamous but honestly, there's not much monogamy going on. And yes, I'm married.
not to my knowledge but anything is possible
RickTheToad
Moderator
Unwise. This can cost you plenty if she finds out. If you need some pus, you an always "hire" an escort. Just use the normal precautions. Burner cell phone, cash only, fake name, etc.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Augustus_McCrae
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2012
- Messages
- 907
- Reaction score
- 1,020
If it’s a short term marriage with no kids why not just divorce?
If it’s a long-term marriage and children are involved, my advice would be to not go there. However if you’re compelled, be smart about it. Get a burner phone thats untraceable. Do what you can to make sure that you won’t be seen by anyone. And by all means , Keep your mouth shut and never tell anyone about it.
-Augustus-
Tdawg
Don Juan
Now, if my wife was a piece of crap like my ex, I would do it in a heart beat. But my wife is like my angel that came and rescued me so can't **** it up and I have three kids I adore.
When I was travelling a lot though and in different cities it was all good. It caught up to me though and wife eventually found out. It was not a good time in our marriage and thinking back, I kind of wish I didn't do it, but it's been over 10 years so whatever. Some secrets though i'll take to my grave.
lamath
Master Don Juan
However imo when wife is not respecting you + no sex.
I say go for it
Would do what Rick says.
Also i would make my social media account as private as possible and make a new one specialy for side action, would also try to have side action as far from home as possible, when on buisness trip if possible.
If only it was short term, I'd have spun out of there a long time ago. I'm simply tired of the little to no sex and starfish. While paying for it seems a big repugnant to me, for a high end escort who does what you want and leaves, it's better than the alternative, which is regretting not using my time when I had it.
If your not getting much sex then I would say that's enough of a reason to cheat right there. A woman is supposed to please her man and it doesn't sound like your woman is pleasing you.
I've never been married but I have had a side chick before. It can be a lot of work. I was always making sure my phone was on silent when I was with one of them, had to make sure call logs/texts were deleted, and I would block the girl I wasn't with when I was with the other. There were plenty of times where I would have sex with both girls in the same day. It just got to be to much and I let the side girl go.
If your going to do this, then get a burner phone. Keep it to short flings with girls or escorts might be your best bet if your fine with paying (check out seekingarrangement.com). The longer you see the same girl on the side, the harder it becomes, and the more likely you will get caught.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
RickTheToad
Moderator
Dude, you do not pay her for sex. You pay her to leave.
Machine10033
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 29, 2017
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- 768
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- 1,068
- Age
- 45
RickTheToad
Moderator
Epic Days
Banned
- Joined
- May 7, 2019
- Messages
- 1,869
- Reaction score
- 1,643
- Age
- 42
I get it. But what is “starfish”?
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
When a woman lays on her back
Arms and legs spread and she doesn’t move. Boring to say the least
Epic Days
Banned
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- 1,869
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- Age
- 42
Ah yes. I understand now. I call that holding sex or rationing sex within the context of a relationship.
sazc
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 23, 2016
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- 4,468
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- 3,402
i.e. have you communicated your distaste, dis pleasure and lack of satisfaction and understand why she's not interested and invested?
And you're tried everything for years, at least going by ur postings.
Once a women has lost complete respect for her husband there's little to go back to.
I remembered one of the mods here (@Desdinova i think) has a guidance booklet of some sort involving having a side dish.
PM him for it.
A man like you deserves some happiness and some kindness in ur life.
Desdinova
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2004
- Messages
- 11,680
- Reaction score
- 4,876
Yes, the cheat manual. Download it here.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
- Status