"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Serious problem (external events effect me too much)

RestUnknown

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Last week I realized something. My mood depends a lot on external events around me. The best way to explain is:

when I see a guy talking to a girl I'm only even partially interested in, I feel down. When that same girl talks to me I feel great, when that girl doesn't talk to that guy, I feel great. When that same girl doesn't talk to anyone, I feel better as well. You see where this is going. But this goes as far (albeit less) as other people talking to others and not to me. This also goes with my friends, every night is different of course, some nights everyone is in a good mood and I am as well, if they're off I am as well.

I honestly need to know what this sh*t is, I need to know how to just feel good about myself every single moment and not be effected by outside events. I need to know why I act this way. I know this is not healthy, but this effecting me in such a way that it has the possibility to, and already has, screw up a lot of things.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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zekko

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I need to know how to just feel good about myself every single moment
I think you have a valid issue that you need to work on, probably by getting more experience.

But this whole concept of "I have to feel good myself all the time" or "I have to feel like I'm the top dog alpha #1 most handsome HM10 in the room at all times" is very overrated and impractical. The manosphere and PUA theory seems to tell you to feel this way. It all seems very millenial, like how everybody has to get a participation trophy and there can't be any winners or losers because someone might feel bad.

If you always feel good about yourself, how are you supposed to ever recognize your faults and weaknesses, and work on them? Humility is a highly underrated characteristic, especially in the seduction community. You need to at least have a certain baseline self esteem though. That's why they say to destroy your ego. It's okay to recognize that you're not perfect, and that it's okay to fail.
 

tony.shai

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You gotta work on yourself more in terms of not caring. I have the same problem too, try to be more outcome independent. For example, how I flip the script with the situation you described is I'd imagine this girl is a slut, and I'm not losing anything, so I feel chill. Reframe it.
 

Billtx49

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A man’s moods and confidence level can naturally vary throughout a day, week, or month, but letting outside events by others affect how you feel, that’s women’s territory. Totally reactionary. Don’t crowd their space and go build some confidence …
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DEEZEDBRAH

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Last week I realized something. My mood depends a lot on external events around me. The best way to explain is:

when I see a guy talking to a girl I'm only even partially interested in, I feel down. When that same girl talks to me I feel great, when that girl doesn't talk to that guy, I feel great. When that same girl doesn't talk to anyone, I feel better as well. You see where this is going. But this goes as far (albeit less) as other people talking to others and not to me. This also goes with my friends, every night is different of course, some nights everyone is in a good mood and I am as well, if they're off I am as well.

I honestly need to know what this sh*t is, I need to know how to just feel good about myself every single moment and not be effected by outside events. I need to know why I act this way. I know this is not healthy, but this effecting me in such a way that it has the possibility to, and already has, screw up a lot of things.
Get testosterone checked.

You sound depressed but it could be early or late stages of low testosterone.

Rsdnation lads use to bump state. Its epic to approach when in state but moreover, you want to smash and approach regardless.
 

RestUnknown

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Testosterone might be a problem, been on a nofap for over a week now and I feel better. Still sucks way too hard to see her talking and laughing with that guy even though she's been texting me practically every day for the last week and a half, but I can't get myself (nor can she apparantly) to talk to her in real life (bear in mind that due to logistics it's very difficult nonetheless but too long to explain).

Are there any proven natural things that increase testosterone noticeably? I don't mean bullsh*t stuff like meditate or something like that. I lift heavy already and my showers end with the coldest water possible, but doesn't seem to do any major effect.
 
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