"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Online dating experts, I need your help

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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HankHill

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bigdave17 said:
no she doesn't care about religion but I get the sense she's one of those "no sex until marriage" types. That's how a lot of these muslim broads are raised
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Isn't that what you said you wanted though? Besides, that's not true. You have ZERO experience to be making ass-umptions.
 
sazc

sazc

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bigdave17 said:
no she doesn't care about religion but I get the sense she's one of those "no sex until marriage" types. That's how a lot of these muslim broads are raised
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Why don't you ask her that question instead of assuming?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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bigdave17

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sazc said:
"messaged all the women"
So, with your criteria, what was that? About five women?

I dare you to swipe right on every woman and see what you get
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probably messaged like 50 to 60 women total

any medium to darker cutie. Like I said, darker women are exactly my type as they have the face I'm very attracted to and body I'm very attracted to (thicker, more curvy)...
 
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HankHill

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sazc said:
Why don't you ask her that question instead of assuming?
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Don't tell him that, he'll literally talk himself out of it. He just needs to take her out for a no-pressure, fun, flirty date and then come back here for his next steps.
 
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spinich

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Couldn't be any worse than the rest of the crap you babble about!
 
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bigdave17

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HankHill said:
Isn't that what you said you wanted though? Besides, that's not true. You have ZERO experience to be making ass-umptions.
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I want sex to happen naturally - say 3th or 4th date for example. I'm not interested in a no sex until marriage chick
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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sazc

sazc

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HankHill said:
Don't tell him that, he'll literally talk himself out of it. He just needs to take her out for a no-pressure, fun, flirty date and then come back here for his next steps.
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I don't see any harm, in an attempt to establish compatibility, in asking her how religious she is, does she pray n times daily, does she not blah blah, is she waiting till marriage.

It's all in the way you phrase the question.
 
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bigdave17

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HankHill said:
Don't tell him that, he'll literally talk himself out of it. He just needs to take her out for a no-pressure, fun, flirty date and then come back here for his next steps.
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I won't ask any hard questions anymore. just keep things simple and straightforward and I'll be fine
 
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sazc

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bigdave17 said:
I want sex to happen naturally - say 3th or 4th date for example. I'm not interested in a no sex until marriage chick
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Why don't you take her out a few times and find out if she's waiting for marriage? You're ASSuming yourself out of a woman

GAWD you make everything so difficult on yourself
 
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bigdave17

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sazc said:
I don't see any harm, in an attempt to establish compatibility, in asking her how religious she is, does she pray n times daily, does she not blah blah, is she waiting till marriage.

It's all in the way you phrase the question.
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she told me she's not religious at all, she told me her family is but they don't bother her about it anymore
 
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HankHill

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bigdave17 said:
I want sex to happen naturally - say 3th or 4th date for example. I'm not interested in a no sex until marriage chick
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Hahahaha...you can't even get a 1st date, why don't we worry about that for now?

sazc said:
I don't see any harm, in an attempt to establish compatibility, in asking her how religious she is, does she pray n times daily, does she not blah blah, is she waiting till marriage.

It's all in the way you phrase the question.
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But remember who you're talking to here...
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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sazc

sazc

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bigdave17 said:
she told me she's not religious at all, she told me her family is but they don't bother her about it anymore
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So she will bang, what's the problem?
 
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bigdave17

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sazc said:
Why don't you take her out a few times and find out if she's waiting for marriage? You're ASSuming yourself out of a woman
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I'm working on getting her out on a date

but I need more options, I can't win this so called dating game with 1 or 2 girls
 
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spinich

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Giving odds that Dave will come through once again and totally screw the pooch with this women also. Any takers??
 
sazc

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bigdave17 said:
even with her not being religious, I'm sure her family has pounded idea in her head of no sex until marriage
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That's why you get her out on a date.
What's to work on? Ask "let's meet for coffee Monday night"
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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