"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
One Liner Text jokes... What are yours?
- Thread starter Von
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Bingo-Player
Master Don Juan
Maximus Rex
Banned
SmooveMooves
Master Don Juan
Most of the jokes I tell are observational.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
was killed in a car crash....
I turned and asked her "hey, how come Superman didn't save Princess Diana?"
She looked at me and said "I know, right?"
I said...."Well......because he's in a wheelchair..."
But I've been having good results just telling myself little inside jokes in my text convos with girls. Whether they get it or not or are entertained by them or not doesn't really matter, that's not the point--but it keeps me engaged which keeps them engaged. I just say a bunch of off the wall ****--back and forth, switching subjects, basically having a conversation with myself that they're allowed to witness and to experience emotionally.
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
I don't get it. That wasn't funny.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Von
Master Don Juan
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- Jan 23, 2016
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- 2,189
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Some girls reply, some don't.... that i have laid them/kissed them/friendzone them as not been a variable in the response rate.
Girl i got friday.... didn't reply
Girl in another city coming back in 2months replied to all (i told her i would call her in may, she sent her digits, i Texted her 2 jokes since)
Girl i laid but now live abroad... did reply to one, but not the other
2 girls who i got the phone no replies
Girl friends... 100% reply
Its to reopen contact out of the blue... than 1 week later if i am free ask them out
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
Of course sometimes a joke will work, but the odds are so high that it won't that it's best to steer clear unless you're an absolute master at text game.
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
Minus her not getting it, I liked that one.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
gravityeyelids
Master Don Juan
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- Mar 6, 2013
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A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
EyeBRollin
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2015
- Messages
- 10,536
- Reaction score
- 8,536
- Age
- 37
Me: Come bring them to me.
old_skoolr
Master Don Juan
Just make sure there something she will get it otherwise its a fail or you come on to hard.
I used to just text random things to chicks, the jokes will be around women. For example.
"So this chick told me she wanted a guy that'll take her breath away....so I punched her in the chest"
"This girl I was seeing said that I never see things from her perspective, so I went to the kitchen"
Stuff like this would get girls responding like: "LMAO OMG Your such an d1ck!!!!"