"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
One Liner Text jokes... What are yours?
- Thread starter Von
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Bingo-Player
Master Don Juan
Maximus Rex
Banned
SmooveMooves
Master Don Juan
Most of the jokes I tell are observational.
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
was killed in a car crash....
I turned and asked her "hey, how come Superman didn't save Princess Diana?"
She looked at me and said "I know, right?"
I said...."Well......because he's in a wheelchair..."
But I've been having good results just telling myself little inside jokes in my text convos with girls. Whether they get it or not or are entertained by them or not doesn't really matter, that's not the point--but it keeps me engaged which keeps them engaged. I just say a bunch of off the wall ****--back and forth, switching subjects, basically having a conversation with myself that they're allowed to witness and to experience emotionally.
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
I don't get it. That wasn't funny.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Von
Master Don Juan
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Some girls reply, some don't.... that i have laid them/kissed them/friendzone them as not been a variable in the response rate.
Girl i got friday.... didn't reply
Girl in another city coming back in 2months replied to all (i told her i would call her in may, she sent her digits, i Texted her 2 jokes since)
Girl i laid but now live abroad... did reply to one, but not the other
2 girls who i got the phone no replies
Girl friends... 100% reply
Its to reopen contact out of the blue... than 1 week later if i am free ask them out
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
Of course sometimes a joke will work, but the odds are so high that it won't that it's best to steer clear unless you're an absolute master at text game.
Atom Smasher
Master Don Juan
Minus her not getting it, I liked that one.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
gravityeyelids
Master Don Juan
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A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
EyeBRollin
Master Don Juan
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Me: Come bring them to me.
old_skoolr
Master Don Juan
Just make sure there something she will get it otherwise its a fail or you come on to hard.
I used to just text random things to chicks, the jokes will be around women. For example.
"So this chick told me she wanted a guy that'll take her breath away....so I punched her in the chest"
"This girl I was seeing said that I never see things from her perspective, so I went to the kitchen"
Stuff like this would get girls responding like: "LMAO OMG Your such an d1ck!!!!"