The Professor
Don Juan
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How long should you do no contact rule with an ex?
Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single
She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
No contact
- Thread starter The Professor
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
backseatjuan
Banned
Purpose of no contact is to move on, find another woman. Forever man.
Romanemp22
Master Don Juan
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Like backseatjuan said, forever. When you're done with her, you're done and on to the next one.
BackInTheGame78
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Firstly you need to ask yourself why you want her back and be honest with yourself as to if you want to really change during that time.
It differs depending on how you acted, the reason for the breakup and how long you were dating.
Anywhere from 21 to 60 days. The worse the breakup and the more beta you acted the longer you do it.
oldmanofthesea
Master Don Juan
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Be honest with why you would want to contact her again. If it is for any hope of getting back together, that ship has already sailed. Forget about it. Doesn’t work. If it is to “be friends,” first ensure you are 100%, absolutely, without a doubt, honest with yourself that you want a true platonic friendship with her, that you understand it will never be romantic, that you will never desire romance with her, and then ask yourself if you believe she will be a true friend.... the kind who invests in you as you invest in her.
99 times out of 100, the guy thinks he can get her back, or wants her back, whether he is willing to admit it to himself or others, and then the self justification comes along, “Oh I just want to make sure she is ok” or, “I don’t want any bad feelings and just want us to be friends.” But that’s not the real reason.
This is why the gold standard advice is to move on with your life, stay in no contact, and keep looking forward to your future.
99 times out of 100, the guy thinks he can get her back, or wants her back, whether he is willing to admit it to himself or others, and then the self justification comes along, “Oh I just want to make sure she is ok” or, “I don’t want any bad feelings and just want us to be friends.” But that’s not the real reason.
This is why the gold standard advice is to move on with your life, stay in no contact, and keep looking forward to your future.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
BackInTheGame78
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Of course it can work. People get back together all the time. The problem is that very rarely has anything really changed and it only is a very short time until they realize it and break up again.
If you want to give this a try you need to ensure you are actually making quality changes in yourself after understanding what went wrong and what you need to fix.
Only necessary contact for the well being of the kids