The Professor
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2020
- Messages
- 23
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- 12
How long should you do no contact rule with an ex?
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Firstly you need to ask yourself why you want her back and be honest with yourself as to if you want to really change during that time.How long should you do no contact rule with an ex?
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Of course it can work. People get back together all the time. The problem is that very rarely has anything really changed and it only is a very short time until they realize it and break up again.Be honest with why you would want to contact her again. If it is for any hope of getting back together, that ship has already sailed. Forget about it. Doesn’t work. If it is to “be friends,” first ensure you are 100%, absolutely, without a doubt, honest with yourself that you want a true platonic friendship with her, that you understand it will never be romantic, that you will never desire romance with her, and then ask yourself if you believe she will be a true friend.... the kind who invests in you as you invest in her.
99 times out of 100, the guy thinks he can get her back, or wants her back, whether he is willing to admit it to himself or others, and then the self justification comes along, “Oh I just want to make sure she is ok” or, “I don’t want any bad feelings and just want us to be friends.” But that’s not the real reason.
This is why the gold standard advice is to move on with your life, stay in no contact, and keep looking forward to your future.
Only necessary contact for the well being of the kidsWhat if you have kids? What's the rule surrounding No Contact then?