She been texting me about the idea, and I'd do it. She'd prefer her, another girl and me over another guy but I'm not sure how to approach this :s. I asked her if she considered it cheating and she said no, but I'm not sure about it all.. thoughts?
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Just understand that if you go through with it, your relationship with her is effectively doomed. The very fact she brings it up is suggestive your relationship is doomed.JayCee23 said:She been texting me about the idea, and I'd do it. She'd prefer her, another girl and me over another guy but I'm not sure how to approach this :s. I asked her if she considered it cheating and she said no, but I'm not sure about it all.. thoughts?
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Deep Dish said:Just understand that if you go through with it, your relationship with her is effectively doomed. The very fact she brings it up is suggestive your relationship is doomed.
CosignedI.A.F.Y.B. said:Is this some fantasy or thought when she was high??
Sounds like a red flag to me. What? You aint givin it to her good enough so she needs someone else added to the equation. It seems that way...
She is not girlfriend material.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Why so?Deep Dish said:Just understand that if you go through with it, your relationship with her is effectively doomed. The very fact she brings it up is suggestive your relationship is doomed.
Bible_Belt said:What does a girlfriend have to do to please sosuave? It's impossible.
I would never consider a girl to be long-term material if she didn't want an occasional threesome.
Because people would categorize her with a sex freak or nympho who can't control her urges, and they would automatically assume shes going to get her relief from other sources other than the OP... which is a rational assumption to watch out for a red flag.Crazy Asian said:can someone explain why this is a red flag?
Because she's a pervert and isn't committed to your relationship.Crazy Asian said:can someone explain why this is a red flag?
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Bible Belt is a girl?Raikojo17 said:women on this site are always wrong
I'm used to it
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.