She been texting me about the idea, and I'd do it. She'd prefer her, another girl and me over another guy but I'm not sure how to approach this :s. I asked her if she considered it cheating and she said no, but I'm not sure about it all.. thoughts?
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
My girlfriend wants a threesome...
- Thread starter JayCee23
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
strong like bull
Senior Don Juan
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- Nov 5, 2002
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for what its worth, i couldnt remain exclusive with a girl who suggested threesomes or doing stuff with other people. for me to be in a relationship, i have to respect the girl in order to love her. she has to have class.
HOWEVER, if i was single or just casually dating and a very attractive girlfriend wanted me to have a fun night with her and her very attractive girlfriend...
i agree with deep dish in that you could probably forget about getting married to this chick.
but if youre just looking for fun... heck now that you know you cant truly settle with her anyways, you could just make the most of it.
-slb
HOWEVER, if i was single or just casually dating and a very attractive girlfriend wanted me to have a fun night with her and her very attractive girlfriend...
i agree with deep dish in that you could probably forget about getting married to this chick.
but if youre just looking for fun... heck now that you know you cant truly settle with her anyways, you could just make the most of it.
-slb
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I.A.F.Y.B.
Master Don Juan
Is this some fantasy or thought when she was high??
Sounds like a red flag to me. What? You aint givin it to her good enough so she needs someone else added to the equation. It seems that way...
I agree with Deep Dish and strong like bull. She is not girlfriend material.
Sounds like a red flag to me. What? You aint givin it to her good enough so she needs someone else added to the equation. It seems that way...
I agree with Deep Dish and strong like bull. She is not girlfriend material.
Bible_Belt
Master Don Juan
What does a girlfriend have to do to please sosuave? It's impossible.
I would never consider a girl to be long-term material if she didn't want an occasional threesome.
I would never consider a girl to be long-term material if she didn't want an occasional threesome.
darkstarrr
Senior Don Juan
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Deep Dish said:
CosignedI.A.F.Y.B. said:
It's as good as over. Call her your gf to her face but in private start looking for another pouch to swing into. For the immediate meantime be open to whatever. Do her friend raw if she is clean. Maybe she is a better lay and you can start seeing her on the side. See this as an opportunity to take a few steps up as a man. If you play this right you can have them both fiending for you.
Good luck.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Crazy Asian
Master Don Juan
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can someone explain why this is a red flag?
Michele l'Arcangelo
Master Don Juan
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Because people would categorize her with a sex freak or nympho who can't control her urges, and they would automatically assume shes going to get her relief from other sources other than the OP... which is a rational assumption to watch out for a red flag.Crazy Asian said:
They say the relationship is doomed because she's already experimenting in other ways and involving other people. Or, perhaps your subconscious wouldn't be able to stand the thought of your girlfriend doing those things involving other people, and your mind will always be uneasy, AKA: insecure... then it leads to the path to neediness/clinginess.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Ok, when WOULDN'T this be a red flag?
What if a DJ wanted a threesome? Would the same apply to him, or would that just make him suave and adventurous?
And how exactly do we know she's been experimenting with this behind the OPs back? This is all just mental masturbation. It could even be a test on the OPs part, or maybe she's an idiot and blurts out stupid things.
More info is needed.
What if a DJ wanted a threesome? Would the same apply to him, or would that just make him suave and adventurous?
And how exactly do we know she's been experimenting with this behind the OPs back? This is all just mental masturbation. It could even be a test on the OPs part, or maybe she's an idiot and blurts out stupid things.
More info is needed.
SmoothTalker
Master Don Juan
I have to disagree with most of you and agree with Bible.
From what the OP said this is not such a bad situation. I think it's one of those fantasies most women have, along with rape (surprisingly). She just happens to be more honest and forward about it, which could be a bad thing meaning they have good open communication about sex.
I also think the fact that she wants it with another girl is a huge plus, where as if it was a second guy, I think that would be a major red flag.
From what the OP said this is not such a bad situation. I think it's one of those fantasies most women have, along with rape (surprisingly). She just happens to be more honest and forward about it, which could be a bad thing meaning they have good open communication about sex.
I also think the fact that she wants it with another girl is a huge plus, where as if it was a second guy, I think that would be a major red flag.
I.A.F.Y.B.
Master Don Juan
Bible Belt is a girl?Raikojo17 said:
theunflushables
Master Don Juan
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This all going to end in tears.
But, thats if it actually happend. Every girl I've ever dated has brought up the idea of a threesome. Only one ever carried through with it. And she got jealous when I stuck it to the other one. We were over the next day.
I think it is something girls feel that they have to bring up to make them look sexy and adventerous.
But, thats if it actually happend. Every girl I've ever dated has brought up the idea of a threesome. Only one ever carried through with it. And she got jealous when I stuck it to the other one. We were over the next day.
I think it is something girls feel that they have to bring up to make them look sexy and adventerous.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.