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My girlfriend thought meeting up with her ex was a good idea

LARaiders85

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It's hardly ridiculous but disagree if you want.

Women are not biological cheaters concerning their DNA because, as the weaker sex, it put themselves and their offspring at risk to "sneak around." They're programmed to find a solid strong male for breeding and have and nurture kids. That why they're attracted to certain traits, we all know in men. Men are programmed to spread their DNA, women are not. 99% of the time when a woman leaves a man she once chose and was once committed to, it's because his game got weak and sloppy and she's no longer attracted to him and no longer sees him as a dominant male. I've seen it 100x.
Very much disagree
 

Mister_Skinny_Jeanz

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As you may see, I am new here so I'm ready for the full treatment.
I have been with my girlfriend for the past 6 months and things were going great.
Until I found out that there was this guy she had a one night stand with 2 years ago. They were still keeping in touch and she was planning to go and visit him (he lives a 100 miles away) after lockdown because she says they are friends.
I put my foot down and said that's highly suspicious behaviour and that I was not having it. She now says she is sorry and wants us to move on.
My question is, is this just straight up grounds to dump her or should I continue the relationship because she listened to me?
dump her ass.
 

Focal core

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Shes testing the waters, you didnt allowed it she'll do it behind your back,if not with him it would be with other guy, you cant control other person what they will do with their body, not even with your mother.

Who has advised you to stay is genuine cuck and are making one.
 

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BackInTheGame78

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We get what we negotiate. If she wants to keep seeking validation from thirsty dudes, she can stay a plate. Not being forced to do anything she doesn’t want to.
If you feel like you need to negotiate that you have already lost.
 

Ricky

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This behavior from women seems to be happening a lot to people on here. Did Cosmo publish an article telling women to do this?

I'd suggest the OP find a few additional plates he can talk to as a counter to this. She did stop what she was doing. It sounds like a sheet test.
 

FuzzX

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Thank God you did not allow her, but you already know the answer to the question. The fact that she is even thinking about this guy still after 2 years is a mjaor red flag.

Traveling 100 miles to "meet a friend". What does girl think you are?
She's just driving there to drink soda pop, play monopoly and gank her brains out on League Of Legends.

sexy-caitlyn1-s497x775-408566-1020.jpg
ahg.jpg


I'm sure its nothing to worry about. ;)
 
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EyeBRollin

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If you feel like you need to negotiate that you have already lost.
No. I don’t know why men willingly accept this behavior from women. By agreeing to an LTR, we are giving up the ability to fvck other broads. What is she giving up? Not having any dudes in the picture is the bare minimum condition for exclusivity. But any guy that wants to end up like OP, feel free to accept whatever scraps she gives you.
 

LARaiders85

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What part of his post do you disagree with? I ask because I’m genuinely curious. In my opinion it’s pretty much spot on. If you let yourself go in looks, finances, or social pull there’s a good chance that she is going to lose attraction and get a wandering eye.
"Women are not biological cheaters according to their DNA"

I'm not sure how anyone who gives the Women's Infidelity and Sex at Dawn books, plus their own experience dating more than a grain of importance could really believe that. Now that women are liberated from monogamous cultural pressure they are not at all acting like Dash describes.
 

Focal core

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People usually tell you what you need to know about 'em, right up front. Maybe it's not in the words they say--but if you're paying close attention to their behaviors, there are warning signs you definitely shouldn't ignore.

Your girl straight up spit it on your face about getting ****s 100 miles away.

I said no more.. I shall retire this thread now.
 

BackInTheGame78

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No. I don’t know why men willingly accept this behavior from women. By agreeing to an LTR, we are giving up the ability to fvck other broads. What is she giving up? Not having any dudes in the picture is the bare minimum condition for exclusivity. But any guy that wants to end up like OP, feel free to accept whatever scraps she gives you.
If a woman values you and the relationship enough they won't do anything to put it in jeopardy. You feeling the need to say anything shows insecurity on your part and silently tells the women that you are used to being cheated on by previous women. And then they start to wonder why that is...
 

EyeBRollin

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If a woman values you and the relationship enough they won't do anything to put it in jeopardy. You feeling the need to say anything shows insecurity on your part and silently tells the women that you are used to being cheated on by previous women. And then they start to wonder why that is...
That is an unnecessary and imprudent risk. Still doesn’t answer the question - what is she giving up to attain your exclusivity?
 

TheProspect

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That is an unnecessary and imprudent risk. Still doesn’t answer the question - what is she giving up to attain your exclusivity?
Sincere question:
Did you let your girl go through all your social media inboxes and text messages as well, explaining to her who each and every female is and what your history with them is? Or is there a double standard because she was the one pressing you for exclusivity?

In my experience, a girl with high interest and who wants your exclusivity (or at least you're her top option at the time) will gradually stop talking to other men herself by giving those guys the slow fade or abruptly turning cold towards them.

We all have experienced girls who turned cold out of nowhere or did the slow fade to us, and not every time it was our fault that they lost interest and withdrew their attention, it was them, they found/had a better option and were more interested in investing their time and energy pursuing that option.

My point being I don't think it is necessary to go through a girl's inboxes and messages, because if down the road she wants to talk to other guys, she'll do it anyways -- and she'll make sure won't get caught. Are you then going to subject her to random unplanned phone searches indefinitely to catch her slipping?

It's good to be cautious and set the conditions up favourably and see sacrifice on her end, but either you trust a girl or you don't.

Vulnerability without naivety is possible, and allowing yourself to truly love and trust someone (and yourself) requires vulnerability. Perhaps you're right @EyeBRollin, in being a little overprotective and cautious at the very beginning, and you'll gradually build trust in her as she proves she's capable of receiving it. I'm just thinking out loud.
 

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EyeBRollin

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Sincere question:
Did you let your girl go through all your social media inboxes and text messages as well, explaining to her who each and every female is and what your history with them is? Or is there a double standard because she was the one pressing you for exclusivity?
She did not ask to see my phone. That’s a smart decision not to go through a single guys phone. She did however ask how many women I was talking to and I answered truthfully. It is a negotiation. Once we agreed to be exclusive, I cancelled the dates with other plates coming up, and informed them it is inappropriate to continue talking. If my girlfriend went through my phone now, she would find no nefarious behavior. I’m not big on social media either (only have a dummy Instagram for searches), so that is a moot point.

In my experience, a girl with high interest and who wants your exclusivity (or at least you're her top option at the time) will gradually stop talking to other men herself by giving those guys the slow fade or abruptly turning cold towards them.

My point being I don't think it is necessary to go through a girl's inboxes and messages, because if down the road she wants to talk to other guys, she'll do it anyways -- and she'll make sure won't get caught. Are you then going to subject her to random unplanned phone searches indefinitely to catch her slipping?
That should not be assumed and is not the bigger point. Women will keep their orbiters on standby. More importantly, women are the beneficiaries of male monogamy. Giving up your ability to fvck other girls for free is frankly a naive decision. That is our leverage. If she wants the security of your loyalty, it must come at a price. That sacrifice is the bare minimum.

No, I have the conversation up front so that I don’t ever have to subject her to phone searches. When the expectations are set to be exclusive, I trust that she will respect that boundary throughout the relationship. If she starts talking to an old flame at a later point in the relationship she is thus a liar and untrustworthy. That is grounds to get dumped. Men who operate like the OP give her plausible deniability, as they leave it up to chance.

It's good to be cautious and set the conditions up favourably and see sacrifice on her end, but either you trust a girl or you don't.
You shouldn’t trust a girl to do the right thing if boundaries aren’t set in stone. Women hide behind their naivety whenever it is convenient for them. “We have always been just friends! I didn’t know he was going to try to sleep with me!”
 

samspade

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Interesting range of reactions.

I would probably dump or relegate to fukk buddy/low plate status. It's one thing if an ex is in town and asked her to lunch. She's saying she thought about driving 100 miles to go see him. I don't have a line of demarcation that's clear, and some guys here will see it as black and white.

Personally, I think this has 1000% more to do with the poster's inner game and how he's handled himself. Some of you might think of this as a "shyt test." I haven't been tested in a long time because I always care less. You can usually tell where a girl is coming from without doing any kind of logical analysis whatsoever. She'll communicate it to you one way or another, and if all else fails you can trust your gut. I'm comfortable with a girl having exes and even still talking to them - I guess this is an "I know it when I see it" thing, + an "if she wants to cheat she will" thing.

What I'm trying to say is, it's fine to feel jealous in the moment, but are you going to carry that with you? Or remind yourself that you'll be fine, and if you have to dump her, well, she had her chance and now she doesn't get to enjoy the new you?

@EyeBRollin , personally I think going through a girl's contacts as a "condition" is over the top. Maybe it works as a power move though. I honestly don't give a shyt about her contacts, for the reasons I stated above...plus I chat and flirt with hot orbiter girls all the time. You do have a point about establishing boundaries, but I don't think precedence or logic mean much in FemaleLand. You'll still be wrong in her mind, and she'll do what she wants, so either way my move is just dump without litigation.
 

Georgepithyou

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"Women are not biological cheaters according to their DNA"

I'm not sure how anyone who gives the Women's Infidelity and Sex at Dawn books, plus their own experience dating more than a grain of importance could really believe that. Now that women are liberated from monogamous cultural pressure they are not at all acting like Dash describes.
Your only as loyal as your options, before qomen didnt have 50 guys messaging her on OLD and Social Media everyday. We also live in a society that holds women to no accountability for their actions.

Without these most women would be loyal despite the cuckold fantasy a lot of men weirdly seem to have
 

derby1

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This behavior from women seems to be happening a lot to people on here. Did Cosmo publish an article telling women to do this?
Men are desperate, and when men are desperate women can put whatever price they want on themselves.

its like a 5 year old offering you his PS3 for 3000 bucks, instead of you laughing him off the park, you jump with joy and get your wallet out.

Hes gonna think your a right punk.
 
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