My best friend is flirting with my girlfriend and she subtly reciprocates

[BoomToTheMoonAlice]

That’s all good and well, I still go knock on the guys door and straighten him out. More so for the empowerment OP needs.

Not worth it, can only end in jail or death. Block the guy and the girl, both are scum bags, move to Burundi (the cheapest country on Earth) and live like a king for a couple months. You'll completely forget about them by week 2. On week 3 you can send them both postcards.

Wish you the best b1tches!
Yours truly, Loser.

 

[The Duke]

I've had several casual friends hit on my girlfriends over the years. The good girls will come and tell you. Women are experts at detecting when a guy is hitting on them. Socially she might play a long to some extent to keep harmony, but a solid chic will come tell you whats up.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

You type just how that photo avatar looks

That's why I test high on congruency.

 

[Dash Riprock]

Total 100% disrespect dude.

Never be afraid to cut toxic people out of your life & your mate is definitely not your mate, he is a snake.

At this point and don't see how your girlfriend can be trusted either.

Might be an idea to cut them both out.

Agreed.

Your "friend" is very disrespectful. Making jokes at you in front of her is bad enough but the over-flirting is also a d*ck move. If you confront him, even in a plain, clam, non-accusatory tone, he'll likely grin and laugh and say you're over-reacting yet he knows exactly what he's doing. Guys like this really piss me off. Though I can't recall being in a situation like this, it would piss me off big time. I assume your friend's girlfriend was in the room too so it's also disrespectful for her.

If it were me, I wouldn't say anything to him or your girlfriend but I would go silent for a while to him. If you bring it up and especially if you get overtly pissed, you do risk looking insecure and jealous which aren't admirable qualities. Plus, then he and your girlfriend know he got to you and that you can't keep your cool.

Sometimes SILENCE speaks louder than words.

Let us know how it turns out.

 

[BoomToTheMoonAlice]

Clearly.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

My nick is from my novels:


I live in Amsterdam, the Netherlands. (And I'm not available for wing.)

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Funny story, I was in the RLD chilling at the bar with other tourist. We go out for a smoke and one dude says BRB. Walks into one shop and out in 18 minutes flat.
Forget about German efficiency

Yes, the coffeeshops in the Red Light District are notoriously slow.

I order mine at the pharmacy.

 

[Scars]

That's not your girl and that's not your friend, ditch them both.

 

[vato]

I talked to my gf earlier today and in the call she denied everything. So now I’m going radio silent like you guys suggested. Should I answer her texts or calls if she tries to reach out to me?

And for the “friend” I won’t be contacting the dude unless he contacts me and I’ll confront him face to face then. But I won’t fight him because that won’t solve any of this. Both of them have shown me what I needed to see. I learned my lesson and I won’t let this sh*t ever happen again

 

[vato]

Lol they gonna do a 3 way.

I swear this crossed my mind as well because his girlfriend never reacted when all this sh*t was going down

 

[_sideways_]

That's why I test high on congruency.

View attachment 11528

Lol....thats the perma stoner smile older dudes have in California

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Lol....thats the perma stoner smile older dudes have in California

That's the smile when you get a lot of nookie.

 

[BoomToTheMoonAlice]

That's the smile when you get a lot of nookie.

Your cat doesn't count

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Your cat doesn't count

He smiles because he gets a lot of belly rubs.

 

[devilkingx2]

After three meetings with her, he told me that if I broke up with her, he and his girlfriend would still maintain contact with her, even though I hadn't mentioned breaking up. This, combined with flirty comments and actions between him and my girlfriend, raised concerns. Comments like “I’m the only one who flirts in this room” while looking at her, and her reaction being getting shy and starting to play with her hair.

Fast forward two years, and during a recent visit to his place, he made her cook while they’re laughing and giggling while cooking together. When the food was done my friend asked her to tighten the table leg (you have to rotate the leg), he then asked her in a flirty tone “is it tight?” And she responded “I would say it is tight”, - all this was done with a flirty undertone. When I expressed my feelings to my girlfriend, she denied any issue.

Ask your friend's girlfriend what she thinks about him asking another woman "is it tight?"

The best possible case scenario here is that your friend is your #1 hater and clearly jealous of your success that he's trying to sabotage. The possibilities are all downhill from there.

 

[Gamisch]

That’s all good and well, I still go knock on the guys door and straighten him out. More so for the empowerment OP needs.

C'mon now. You did nothing few month go but you advice other men to get a criminal record AT BEST over some unholy woman that would be gone either way..

Better advice is to simply leave them both.

Dont advice other men to use violence against people for the sake of a woman.

 

[vato]

Ask your friend's girlfriend what she thinks about him asking another woman "is it tight?"

The best possible case scenario here is that your friend is your #1 hater and clearly jealous of your success that he's trying to sabotage. The possibilities are all downhill from there.

He has two newborn kids with her and I don’t want to be a home wrecker. I would ask her otherwise and I don’t want to involve her into this mess

C'mon now. You did nothing few month go but you advice other men to get a criminal record AT BEST over some unholy woman that would be gone either way..

Better advice is to simply leave them both.

Dont advice other men to use violence against people for the sake of a woman.

I wouldn’t resort to violence anyway. No woman is worth jail time or broken hands.

He did me two favors though: showed me what she tried to hide, imagine if I fell for her pressure and ended up marrying her? Dodged a bullet. And second, I can get rid of this snake ass friend

 

[obelisk]

You're not establishing and maintaining proper boundaries with your friends or your women. Toxic people usually need to be kicked to the curb permanently. If they aren't respecting your boundaries then they probably never will and trust is most likely destroyed permanently. Sad but true and chalk it up to the game. You can teach people skills but you can't teach them to not be a ****.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

One fact: When a guy has a woman on his side, he's got access to a whole tool kit of manipulation that you just don't, I mean this is a vector of attack a single man just can't defend against.

One thing should tell you the truth: The shared indifference these people have for you, where is it going to lead? Anywhere good?

Your friends indifference, his behaviour was adopted directly by the women, that's the danger of not setting limits and boundaries.

This guy isn't your friend. This woman isn't your woman.

Also the over sexualizing happening by the friend is a common thing that new fathers that are overwhelmed do, it's a sign they are getting ready to bolt, his wife could just be entertaining his attitude out of fear he'll leave otherwise, you never know what's happening behind closed doors, once the kids become sentient he'll likely be out of the picture by the sounds of things

 

[BackInTheGame78]

You're not establishing and maintaining proper boundaries with your friends or your women. Toxic people usually need to be kicked to the curb permanently. If they aren't respecting your boundaries then they probably never will and trust is most likely destroyed permanently. Sad but true and chalk it up to the game. You can teach people skills but you can't teach them to not be a ****.

If you have to have a boundary with a friend then I would just defriend them. They know what is right and wrong, what is respectable and not.

Either they respect you enough and value your friendship enough not to do that or they don't.

No amount of talking will change that, they will just make sure to be more subtle and do it behind your back...same as a woman would do when you try and set a boundary.

Stop wasting your time with people who don't respect you and focus on the ones who set their own boundaries because they have their own standards to uphold and don't need you to tell them what those are.