"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Looking for your own sexist jokes

P

Pakwah

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Example -

Why doesn't a woman wear a watch?
There is a perfectly good clock on the stove

Why is a womens wedding dress white?
So the dishwasher matches the fridge

Why do women have smaller feet then men?
Its a evolutionary process so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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D

Drewskie

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hahahahaha. The fridge one, nice. I don't too many.... except, what do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you are alreay told her twice.

What do you do when the dishwasher doesn't work?

Slap the B!tch.
 
M

mpimpin

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no wonder PenKitten doesn't frequent this forum anymore
 
S

speakeasy

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Pakwah said:
Example -

Why doesn't a woman wear a watch?
There is a perfectly good clock on the stove

Why is a womens wedding dress white?
So the dishwasher matches the fridge

Why do women have smaller feet then men?
Its a evolutionary process so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink
Click to expand...
There's always the undisputed king of sexist jokes:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWzI_Wn0ZwM&feature=related
 
penkitten

penkitten

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whats the difference between your old lady and your refridgerator?
one's called an ice-a-box the other is called a nice-a-box

lame italian oldie hehe
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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B

bob2007

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Snow is beautiful, till you have to deal with it. Kinda like women.
 
R

R1_test pilot

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There a 250,000 battered women in this country, And all this time I've been eating them Raw.

Why did the women cross the road....Who cares, WTF is she doing out of the kitchen!!
 
O

OTB

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You guys wanna hear a joke?

:crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: WOMEN'S RIGHTS! :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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O

OTB

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DJDamage said:
Its funny cause its true!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjxY9rZwNGU
Click to expand...

Laugh My Ass Off ----> Just finished watching the first two videos :D


My friend posted the first video (Women Know Your Limits) on his Myspace page in the forum of a bulleiten, :yes:
He eventually got flamed by half the females on his friend list! :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:
 
M

macallik

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what do you call a woman with an opinion ?
A single mother.

- Corey Holcomb
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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