dj_inprogress
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Have your ever broken up with a girl that you had been in a LTR(+6) because you wanted to date other people? Later on realizing that she may have been the best one.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Letting go of the one
- Thread starter dj_inprogress
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Crazystarf
Don Juan
6 years is a huge time gap in regards to evaluating someone. If you haven't realized that she's completely right for you or not in that time, it means that you probably deserve better than what you have.
Even if you think she was the best one, eventually a better one will come across.
Even if you think she was the best one, eventually a better one will come across.
JohnChops
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I always go by the saying , there isn't one right girl for you but many right girls out there for you. The one doesn't exist but exists in many girls.
Agreed. Lose "the one" type of thinking. There is no "one". Just a person the way they are when you meet.
Even if you think she is, you might marry/have kids/ and both of you may change over the years
and be divorced within ten years....then she really wasn't, was she?
Even if you think she is, you might marry/have kids/ and both of you may change over the years
and be divorced within ten years....then she really wasn't, was she?
JohnChops
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I agree , maybe my wording is a bit offPairPlusRoyalFlush said:
. My point being there isnt such thing as the "one" is the bottom line. Good thing for us "small group" out of about 3.5 billion girls means 100,000s of girls are still attracted to us. Keeping it positive you know
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
dj_inprogress
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Thank you all for the sound advice.
HalfPUAHalfAFC
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What you are experiencing is buyer's remorse in reverse.
Buyer's remorse is when you finally get the girl and then realize she was not all you thought she was. Or, she gets you and then she decides shortly after you are not her cup of tea.
When you break up in a LTR, you sometimes start to feel that maybe you made a bad decision. This will be probably in the first week or two.
And it can linger on if you do not find new women to date, have sex with, etc.
Now, it is possible that your ex-gf was a really good match for you and maybe you acted rashly in dumping her. Few quality women are out there. But, there is no "one" and, yes, there are more quality women in fact out there.
Many of us have experienced this sort of post-hoc questioning of our decisions. It's perfectly natural.
But, here's what NOT to do: If it turns out you decide that you made a mistake and want her back, DO NOT CHASE HER. I made that mistake once and wasted 3 years of my life trying to get an ex-gf back. She had all the power and I turned total chode. It was embarrassing.
So, suck it up and move forward. If she comes back, think about it carefully.
Buyer's remorse is when you finally get the girl and then realize she was not all you thought she was. Or, she gets you and then she decides shortly after you are not her cup of tea.
When you break up in a LTR, you sometimes start to feel that maybe you made a bad decision. This will be probably in the first week or two.
And it can linger on if you do not find new women to date, have sex with, etc.
Now, it is possible that your ex-gf was a really good match for you and maybe you acted rashly in dumping her. Few quality women are out there. But, there is no "one" and, yes, there are more quality women in fact out there.
Many of us have experienced this sort of post-hoc questioning of our decisions. It's perfectly natural.
But, here's what NOT to do: If it turns out you decide that you made a mistake and want her back, DO NOT CHASE HER. I made that mistake once and wasted 3 years of my life trying to get an ex-gf back. She had all the power and I turned total chode. It was embarrassing.
So, suck it up and move forward. If she comes back, think about it carefully.