"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Knock her off her pedestal with 3 words.
- Thread starter Dirtheart
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
If you said this to a girl you had just met you would sound like a ****en mongo. If you have never met the girl before then how could she look "different"? Different from what?
Think about it mate, this is only used to knock a girl off a pedestal you accidentally put her on before, you will find some girls have themselves on a permanent pedestal in which case this would also work.
"You walk funny.."
When she gives you a "wtf" look, just say:
"I don't know, but it would appear as though one leg is faster than the other." You HAVE to say this with a straight face, though. Just watch her face as that little ego of hers pops right before your very eyes.
LOL.
The Main Event
Don Juan
You're not telling her she looks different to other girls. You're saying "it's been a while since I last saw you; you don't have the same effect on me you used to ... you know, back when I used to worship the ground you walked on", but not in as many words.
It takes her off her pedestal, yes, but the main purpose is to draw a big thick black line under your past AFC behaviour towards her, and move on.
You really want to communicate, "hey, you used to have me under your thumb, but I'm not so easily impressed nowadays, honey", but of course coming right out and saying that - or worse, throwing some banal insult at her - is desperate ... and transparently so.
"You look different" isn't an insult, at least not an overt one. But the girl can't help but get to thinking, "if I used to be a goddess to this guy, if he found everything about me perfect or as good as ... well, any change would be a step backwards ... right?"
"I almost didn't recongise you" serves to twist the knife that little bit harder. Very clever, very cruel. I love it.
To borrow from another poster, "maybe the way you carry yourself" would be a killer follow-up if she tries to pin you on specifics. Not sure I could keep a straight face through that one, but if you can, more power to you.
I am
The Main Event.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Capi Crimini
Banned
Being vauge isn't always good. One it creates a mystery about you and your mind. But that can't hold up forever. You need something to back it up. It's good for initiation thought. Remeber in HS there are fewer 1 night stands. 2. most girls like to know the guy, that way they don't feel slutty and can assure themselves there doing the right thing.
Anyway. I think there have been better posts
To the above poster. Different doesn't mean worse. I've known AFCs to tell girls they look different. Sencond the way your saying only works if you havn't seen them in 3weeks+. If you walk up to a girl you've known for the past three years and just talked to yesterday and say
"hey. I almost didn't recognize you. "
Your not gonna pose the not AFC anymore sign, but hey I'm developing Alzcymers(sp?) sign.
The best way to show your not AFC anymore is get on with your life and go for other women... If you care enough that you have to show your past 'crush'
that you don't like her anymore. Your stooping back down to the AFC level. DJ's don't obsess. and revenge and having to prove to a chick that your not AFC is AFC and a form ofobsession. A DJ doesn't have to prove anything. he is.
Nough said... you guys need to read more post less
Capi Crimini
Banned
ninty percent of these are things you don't even have to think to think them up... baisically there a waste.
2.neg hits should be something that is seriously different or wrong with her. Not some pre-phrased thing. and they shouldn't be insults like. You look fatter. unless she is fatter, even then your on the verge of jerk if you do it to often. Once and while is good. And only after you've got rapport and a relationship.
If people need to post these for AFC to use them then were lost. You shouldn't have a little sheet of paper with all your insults for the day... creativity works better.
The Main Event
Don Juan
I'm talking a substantially longer timeframe than that, mate. I assume the original poster was too.
In response to another of your grievances, this tip isn't tailored to a highschool scenario. That's why it's in the grown ups' forum.
When I have 566 posts in a little over six months, I'll consider myself vulnerable to that particular criticism.
I am
The Main Event
Capi Crimini
Banned
I could have sworn this was teh HS fourm. lolyeah when I can't sleep I come here and rant.... but the majority of my posts are in Anything else. I try not to post tips unless there new ideas or somthing like that.
Thats what I ment in post less read more. I swear this was the HS thread. Thats what having Firefox get you. Damn tabs.lol
milkncereal2
Don Juan
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- Apr 4, 2004
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
The idea is to follow up this comment with disinterested signals and let her draw the negative conclusion herself.
comic_relief
Master Don Juan
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.