Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Keep her or kick her ass to the curb?

captain55

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2013
Messages
1,203
Reaction score
395
Well fellas, most of you say in this situation give her a shot but detach emotionally. I’m not going to cheat on her but I’m definitely not going to be going all in with her for a while.
 

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
5,882
Reaction score
3,750
Age
32
Well fellas, most of you say in this situation give her a shot but detach emotionally. I’m not going to cheat on her but I’m definitely not going to be going all in with her for a while.
Emotionally detaching from a girlfriend is bad advice. Frankly, there is no reason to be exclusive with a woman if you have to detach from her. Check her on her shvt once, tell her it is unacceptable then move forward. If she repeats the bad behavior you simply dump her with no hesitation.
 

captain55

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2013
Messages
1,203
Reaction score
395
Emotionally detaching from a girlfriend is bad advice. Frankly, there is no reason to be exclusive with a woman if you have to detach from her. Check her on her shvt once, tell her it is unacceptable then move forward. If she repeats the bad behavior you simply dump her with no hesitation.
Im just having a hard time getting things back to where they were on my end. I can **** her, but the emotional part it’s just hard for me to feel that connection right now after what she did. Even if it was somewhat innocent, logic isn’t helping me right now. I heard what I heard and it’s ****ing with me. I don’t care if your friend called the guy and you were drunk and haven’t seen him in years. You called him under my ****ing roof, and had I not entered the conversation who knows where it would of led to. Would she have made plans to see the guy? I just don’t know. Point is she ****ed up and I shouldn’t have to deal with it.

but...the sex is great and she treats me like a king so I’m on the fence about what to do still
 
Last edited:

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
5,882
Reaction score
3,750
Age
32
Im just having a hard time getting things back to where they were on my end. I can **** her, but the emotional part it’s just hard for me to feel that connection right now after what she did. Even if it was somewhat innocent, logic isn’t helping me right now. I heard what I heard and it’s ****ing with me. I don’t care if your friend called the guy and you were drunk and haven’t seen him in years. You called him under my ****ing roof, and had I not entered the conversation who knows where it would of led to. Would she have made plans to see the guy? I just don’t know. Point is she ****ed up and I shouldn’t have to deal with it.

but...the sex is great and she treats me like a king so I’m on the fence about what to do still
This is something to work through with a professional therapist. If she’s a great gal otherwise, you have to accept what happened as done and move forward. That’s all that can be done in the context of an LTR. You can keep mental score of her fvck ups but can’t take it out on her. All that does is lower interest level and create future problems.
 

captain55

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2013
Messages
1,203
Reaction score
395
This is something to work through with a professional therapist. If she’s a great gal otherwise, you have to accept what happened as done and move forward. That’s all that can be done in the context of an LTR. You can keep mental score of her fvck ups but can’t take it out on her. All that does is lower interest level and create future problems.
let me ask you this then. How should I proceed when it comes to the vibe not being the same on my end? I am more distant than usual and I know she’s upset about it, but at the same time She can’t expect to just snap her fingers and things go back to exactly how they were. She is the reason we are in this position and I shouldn’t have had to deal with that bull****. Before this weekend things were great. I don’t want to punish her or cheat on her, I just need time and she needs to respect it.
 

image

"If you love women, you must read the SoSuave Guide to Women. It's fantastic!"

DonJuanjr

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 6, 2021
Messages
708
Reaction score
494
Age
33
Just engage in silence/distance for a while to reaffirm that she can't get away with doing things that even SHE thinks is wrong. I would be prepared for her to monkey branch. From what I've read on this site, it doesn't matter if she is fighting for your relationship. She can be fighting for the relationship one day, and then monkey branch a few days later. Others on here have attested to this.
 

captain55

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2013
Messages
1,203
Reaction score
395
Just engage in silence/distance for a while to reaffirm that she can't get away with doing things that even SHE thinks is wrong. I would be prepared for her to monkey branch. From what I've read on this site, it doesn't matter if she is fighting for your relationship. She can be fighting for the relationship one day, and then monkey branch a few days later. Others on here have attested to this.
Ok so why not just tell her look let’s just be casual for now?
 

DonJuanjr

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 6, 2021
Messages
708
Reaction score
494
Age
33
That might get her to monkey branch sooner? @EyeBRollin said going too extreme with the punishment will only result in lowering of interest from her. I think if you talk about non monogamy, she will see it as a sign of non security from you. Which will result in her to start to subconsciously think about where to get security from.
 

captain55

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2013
Messages
1,203
Reaction score
395
That might get her to monkey branch sooner? @EyeBRollin said going too extreme with the punishment will only result in lowering of interest from her. I think if you talk about non monogamy, she will see it as a sign of non security from you. Which will result in her to start to subconsciously think about where to get security from.
As ****ed up as it sounds, Do you think gaming other chicks is necessary to keep certain ones? I’ve had the abundance mindset this entire fling, She has caught me out with other beautiful women, I told her that I feel numb most of the time and it’s hard for me to love .... and all it did was make her interest level go up. She complains that I don’t text her enough and am aloof and I stress her out. But I feel like the things she says she hates are the things that attract her to me. She says I’m the only guy that excites her and she usually gets bored. She also told me she left the last guy she was with and he treated her very well.
 

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
5,882
Reaction score
3,750
Age
32
let me ask you this then. How should I proceed when it comes to the vibe not being the same on my end? I am more distant than usual and I know she’s upset about it, but at the same time She can’t expect to just snap her fingers and things go back to exactly how they were. She is the reason we are in this position and I shouldn’t have had to deal with that bull****. Before this weekend things were great. I don’t want to punish her or cheat on her, I just need time and she needs to respect it.
Hire a shrink. Can’t hold onto that energy against her when it is something internal that you are dealing with.
 
Top