"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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"Katherine Heigl Hates Balls"

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Burroughs

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historically a woman like this would be gang raped then ostracized.
 

vatoloco

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DJDamage said:
and if there was ever a commercial making fun of women being raped by a man, everything associated with it including the actor would be finished.
True.

But you also have to understand the value of Shock Advertising and Dark Humor. Powerful and effective.
 

Colossus

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Katherine Heigl just seems like a ****y b!tch.

Espi said:
Perfectly fine to make fun of crushing a man's balls while decrying the tragedy of breast cancer.
Funny, breast cancer isnt even the #1 killer of women, nor the #1 cancer killer. It just has so much PR and celebrity pimping that it gets undue attention when there are much more prevalent causes of morbidity and mortality out there for women, like heart disease (#1 killer), lung cancer (#1 cancer), ovarian cancer (very lethal cancer in women), and so on.

Or (gasp!) someone could pay the slightest bit of attention to prostate cancer (leading cancer in men, #2 cause of cancer death)....but nah, women and their problems are more important :rolleyes: .
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Warrior74

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Well the joke is that she's known for being a talentless harpy shrew, so you know, she'd be perfect for this? It's sorta meta that way. She thinks she's playing a talentless harpy shrew ironically, when in actuality she's just being the way everyone thinks she really is.
 

Rollo Tomassi

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Where'd you pull this from DJDAMAGE?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Jitterbug

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She needs to get a sex tape out already. Her career has completely bombed.
 

Julius_Seizeher

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Well the video's been removed now, but I hope someone gives her a pink sock and posts that sh!t on youtube.
 

MatureDJ

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DJDamage said:
Check out Kath's new scene in her new movie (fast forward to 0:50):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1Y2uXjsKjs

Its so funny! hahaha! you can clearly see the humor at what she is doing! if the situation was reversed I am sure it would have been funny as well!!
This movie sounds like a chick flick romantic comedy distilled to the purity of Everclear. I'll pass. :down:
 

MatureDJ

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Jitterbug said:
She needs to get a sex tape out already. Her career has completely bombed.
I'd even watch one of her chick flicks if she showed some snatch ...
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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mrRuckus

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Colossus said:
Katherine Heigl just seems like a ****y b!tch.



Funny, breast cancer isnt even the #1 killer of women, nor the #1 cancer killer. It just has so much PR and celebrity pimping that it gets undue attention when there are much more prevalent causes of morbidity and mortality out there for women, like heart disease (#1 killer), lung cancer (#1 cancer), ovarian cancer (very lethal cancer in women), and so on.

Or (gasp!) someone could pay the slightest bit of attention to prostate cancer (leading cancer in men, #2 cause of cancer death)....but nah, women and their problems are more important :rolleyes: .

Every season the NFL wears all that fvcking pink for breast cancer and it irritates to me no end. Men are dying, and it's a male sport, so raise awareness of male illness. Breast cancer gets entirely too much attention, and i have no idea who these women are who don't know they're supposed to get checked for it yet.
 
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