"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Is hands in pockets bad body language?

timmylivingalie

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Since its about to become winter and most people are wearing jackets is it ok to put your hands in your jacket pockets?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Bokanovsky

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No, you are morally obligated to freeze your hands off out of a deep sense of commitment to DJ principles.
 

Boilermaker

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I don't like hands in pockets.

Cold or otherwise.

No further comments.
 

Down Low

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It's considered gentlemanly to hide a boner by keeping one hand in the pants pocket while standing or walking. Visually, this works much better when you're wearing a sports jacket or blazer, and slacks with pleats. It's difficult to get away with a leisurely pose while wearing a busy-ness suit.

If it's cold, wear an overcoat, gloves, a hat, a scarf, and maybe an umbrella.

I get the impression you're talking about workmen's zipper jackets, peacoats, and the like. If you're dressing that far down, well, your choice of attire is your real problem -- not what you're doing when you presented yourself to the world that way.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Scaramouche

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Dear Timmy,
Yeah Hands in pockets is slovenly!
 

HalfAddict

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Yeah if you ever feel like putting your hands in your pocket instead place your thumbs in the belt loops on the front of your pants.


"Hands On the Old Hips, or Through the Belt Loops
By placing his hands on his hips, it makes his shoulders appear broader and allows him to look bigger. This obviously shows you that he’s trying to capture your attention and show you how masculine he is, and how he could be your big protector. When a man places his fingers through his belt loops, it displays the genital region in a triangular shape, and says, “come and get me tiger”. Since men can be primitive I thought I’d throw this in, when you spot a group of men standing together with their fingers through their belt loops, it means that they are marking their territory…"

http://webpages.shepherd.edu/cpoole01/language/reading/men.html
 

EastWind

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Or you can just stop worrying about things that have no meaning whatsoever when it comes to getting women and focus on things that do. Like not worrying about these things.

Do you see where I'm going with this?
 

The Duke

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I have always enjoyed a good game of pocket pool with myself. :) Not planning on giving that up anytime soon. Girls always approach me more when I do this anyways!
 

Poonani Maker

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I was standing like this http://www.google.com/imgres?start=...8&ved=1t:429,r:59,s:200,i:181&biw=981&bih=638 in my daily travels BeFore the movie came out. It was just how I was setting my wrists on my hips at that particular time in my life. When I'd seen the movie, scary how I was looking at my recent self, and not copying from the movie, how it coincided --- Very strange. I no longer stand that way, not because of the movie, but because I just naturally have shifted/changed to a different me. I vary it up quite a bit in my encounters, and I've been told after fvcking a woman that, "You're never boring..." when I'm telling them I'm boring, you must be getting sick of me.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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U

user43770

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HalfAddict said:
Yeah if you ever feel like putting your hands in your pocket instead place your thumbs in the belt loops on the front of your pants.

This is what I do when I think about it.
 

Nutz

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timmylivingalie said:
Since its about to become winter and most people are wearing jackets is it ok to put your hands in your jacket pockets?

Generally, yes, it's bad body language. It can come off as insecure and send subtle cues that you're hiding something. What you can do to make it okay is to disqualify it from being a bad thing, simply by saying "brrr... it's cold out here!" and then stuff your hands in your pockets. That's a lot different from rolling up to a woman with your hands hidden from the start.
 

timmylivingalie

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samspade said:
Body language has meaning. There is such a thing as signaling.

Recently I saw a group of groomsmen waiting to pose for wedding photos in a park. They were all acting jovial, making jokes and smiling, laughing, etc. One guy stood in the back, looking down a lot, with his hands firmly ensconced in his pant pockets. He was chuckling with the rest, but if I asked you to pick out the biggest Follower in the group, you'd have no problem singling this guy out, solely based on body language.

If I can see it, imagine what the opposite sex reads into it.
Thanks
 

timmylivingalie

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Nutz said:
Generally, yes, it's bad body language. It can come off as insecure and send subtle cues that you're hiding something. What you can do to make it okay is to disqualify it from being a bad thing, simply by saying "brrr... it's cold out here!" and then stuff your hands in your pockets. That's a lot different from rolling up to a woman with your hands hidden from the start.
Thanks
 

BMX

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I am not allowed to when in uniform as it gives off an unprofessional demeanor. As a result of that I've stopped doing it completely.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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