"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Adraisthesaint

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Hello all. I'm new here on the SoSuave forum. Just thought I'd join this forum instead of reddit or similar forums so I can get authentic discussion on intersexual dynamics. I have a few field reports I'll post every now and then so I can get some outside perspective on the experiences I have with women in general. Mind you, it's not like I'm trying to get with them or anything, it's just that I'm trying to understand why they acted in a certain way when I said something. Even in casual conversation, I'd like to understand women more.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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BackInTheGame78

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Hello all. I'm new here on the SoSuave forum. Just thought I'd join this forum instead of reddit or similar forums so I can get authentic discussion on intersexual dynamics. I have a few field reports I'll post every now and then so I can get some outside perspective on the experiences I have with women in general. Mind you, it's not like I'm trying to get with them or anything, it's just that I'm trying to understand why they acted in a certain way when I said something. Even in casual conversation, I'd like to understand women more.
Welcome to the forums. Feel free to ask away. Lots of differing opinions on various topics, but usually you'll start seeing similar points of view from posters enough to where you might be able to glean some knowledge.

That being said, women are some strange creatures and it's simply our best guess and not definitive facts. Much of the way that act are based on how they feel around you in the moment
 

Adraisthesaint

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Welcome to the forums. Feel free to ask away. Lots of differing opinions on various topics, but usually you'll start seeing similar points of view from posters enough to where you might be able to glean some knowledge.

That being said, women are some strange creatures and it's simply our best guess and not definitive facts. Much of the way that act are based on how they feel around you in the moment
Yeah, I know they operate based on how they feel. When I talk to women and introduce myself to them, I seem like a smart guy to them. It's true, though. However, I am a sociable guy too. I'm naturally quiet and don't say much so I try to play to that strength. I actually want to give and example of how talking to women at my workplace goes.

So I was talking to this new girl and I introduced myself to her one day and shook her hand and everything. The next day I tried to guess where she was from based on her accent. Kinda missed the mark there actually but worth a shot. The next time I talked to her, she discreetly mentioned her boyfriend during the conversation. I didn't react to it but we continued talking. In this instance, I was wondering why she felt the need to mention it. Was I indicating sexual interest in her? Because the way I see it, I'm trying to look past a girl's looks and treat her like any other girl I'm not attracted to. I'm trying to unlearn acting noticeably different around a girl I find attractive. What does everyone else make of this?
 

Billtx49

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If she dropped the I have a bf line, she likely thought you were starting to come on to her or give her too much attention.
Your spending time thinking about where she was from and then guessing probably indicated that to her.
The ‘you have an interesting accent, where are you from’ line would have been more appropriate.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Unless a girl makes a move on you at work, I wouldn't advise it if you are in the US. Sexual Harassment is not something you want on your permanent record.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Adraisthesaint

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If she dropped the I have a bf line, she likely thought you were starting to come on to her or give her too much attention.
Your spending time thinking about where she was from and then guessing probably indicated that to her.
The ‘you have an interesting accent, where are you from’ line would have been more appropriate.
Yeah I agree with you there. I telegraphed that too much by taking a wild guess at it. Would've been better to let her talk about it herself and start a convo from there. By the way, I didn't really talk to her much after that given that she picked up on some level of interest, but I'm just experimenting anyway.

There was actually another girl who was new that I spoke to before the one I was just talking about. When I first introduced myself to her we talked about college and everything. I ended up going on a whole schpeel about computer science to her but then something came up and I had to get back to work. The second time around I decided to start a conversation again and then within the first minute or so, she immediately pulled the boyfriend card saying "my boyfriend likes doing that" or something along those lines. I find it annoying how she did this despite me not having sexual interest in her. As far as I'm concerned, I just wanted to talk. I took it as her being loyal or reserved since she is always in a corner away from other people while working. Thoughts?
 

Billtx49

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When I first introduced myself to her we talked about college and everything. I ended up going on a whole schpeel about computer science
Too much attention. Workplace introductions are usually only that. After working together awhile it gets more casual and informal, work demand permitting.
Sounds like you’re immediately coming across as the hot and horny getting to know you approach, Or these women want to focus on their work.…
 

Adraisthesaint

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Too much attention. Workplace introductions are usually only that. After working together awhile it gets more casual and informal, work demand permitting.
Sounds like you’re immediately coming across as the hot and horny getting to know you approach, Or these women want to focus on their work.…
Right. Figured as much. When I get in situations like these where I already came across as too interested, I go cold on them knowing that it’s not worth the effort. Trying not to be autistic about it though. I still say hi every now and then to them.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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