"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
I'm too damn lazy and need life changing advice
- Thread starter Rint
- Start date
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
CalmCoolAndConfident
Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 18, 2007
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WisdomofaMadman
Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 9, 2006
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So do I, really, but I'm doing things to build up my discipline and make me a better person. An interesting article to read, posted on Steve Pavlina's web site, a six part series one Self-Discipline:
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/06/self-discipline/
Focusing on how you don't have 'enough' motivation isn't going to help you become a better person, unless your 'better self' is unmotivated and self-loathing. And if that's the case, I hope your 'better self' is also planning to be a virgin, because he won't be very attractive to the ladies.
Focus on correcting the small, easy things first. Don't try to pick up sand and create a microscope. If your room is messy, take some time every week to pick it up. Do chores on time, and turn in all your homework on time. It is the habits that you create which will make you a better person.
Although, since you're 15, you also have a long time ahead of you, and you aren't done growing. Think about who you want to be when you graduate from high school, when you start college. See him in your mind, and use him to motivate you. Let him provide encouragement, or kick your a$$ into gear if you get lazy. How many men on this board wish that they could go back in time and tell their younger selves what to do? To develop discipline, to overcome the fear, to develop muscles and style, to stop acting like a pvssy or b!tch, to be a man?
If I could, I would. I'd kick my 15y.o self in the nuts, tell him (myself) to suck it up and be a man, then take him to a mall to by some clothes that actually fit and match. Force him to approach the girls I had crushes on back then, giving tips for success and support after rejections, and make sure that he never let an opportunity slip away because of fear. Proper diet and exercise (damn, I drank a lot of mountain dew back then!) and build up his self-confidence and self-respect.
Develop the discipline to become the man you were born to be.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Once you find this person, think about how he will react if he was in your situation. Then follow what you think this person will do, and do it. My model is tennis player Rafael Nadal. Dont ask. Watch him playing if you want to know why.
lurker
Senior Don Juan
TruthHurts
Don Juan
who cares what they think?Rint said:ok i'ma keep working out cause the chicks say it makes me look good.
Stop living your life for girls, and start living your life for YOU. When you do that, the girls will naturally be attracted to you.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.