"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Ignore, keep chasing or just be friends with her

JesperJ

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Hi. So, i don't really know what to do with this girl from class - i've had a really big crush on her for about 2 -3 months (oneitis, i know) and we've talked for 6 months. Since the beginning, she has been (very) physical and flirting with me which i have reciprocated and intensified since crushing on her. Until a few weeks ago, i really thought she was into me - we were snapping and chatting multiple times a day, mostly initiated by her. However, 2 weeks ago i asked if i should come over to her place one evening to watch a movie to which she agreed (we had never done that before, and i thought it was on). But just 10 minutes before i was heading out to her place, she flaked (she had to get up very early the next morning). Instead, she said that i should come to her place next tuesday. However, monday she suggested that we went to the cinema with a mutual friend instead on tuesday. This is like the 3rd time she flaked on me, and i think that made her intentions pretty clear...

Because of the flaking I'm like 80% certain that she's not into me and only wants us to be friends. I still have a mad crush on her but i'm kind of angry with her for flaking. As mentioned, i'm in class with her, and we have a lot of mutual friends, so i can't completely ignore her. But i thought about just backing off and never initiating contact while still being polite. If i'm wrong and she is in fact interested, i suppose she would express it to some degree with me backing off. Could it be that she flaked because she was afraid i was only in it to get laid (which i'm not) or is it a lost cause? Or am i better off just continuing our flirty friendship as if nothing happened?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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wifehunter

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Why don't you focus on your studies, and forget women for awhile?
 

MoreThanSmooth

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She’s been “very physical” for nearly 6 months and you’ve done nothing?

That’s why she’s flaking. You never made the move and now she’s keeping you around as an option or an orbiter.

The flaking is to see how desperate you are for her, feeds her ego.

I’ve made the same mistake myself a bunch of times. If a girl likes you and you like her, you go for it. You don’t wait months.
 

Thatfeel21

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Talked for 6 months? Very physical? What does this even mean? If she flaked so late into seeing you, she most likely talked herself outta seeing you at the last sec. Does she have a bf by any chance?
 

ohrein

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Back off, be polite but interact as little as possible, study hard. Make something of yourself. I'm presuming you're a teenager or just over. Women should be super low on your priorities. Start working on your future now.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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devilkingx2

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This is like the 3rd time she flaked on me, and i think that made her intentions pretty clear...
I would've deleted her number after 1, blocked her if there was ever somehow a 2 and leaked her nudes if it happened a third time, wtf do you mean should you keep chasing or be friends? lol

should you keep chasing or be friends with the guy who beat you up for lunch money in middle school?
 
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