If she asked you to hang out and then cancels...?

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

At the end of the day it all boils down to you are far more interested in her at THIS point in time than she is in you.

That may change or it may

At the beginning of a relationship, the guy usually has to be more interested and the goal is to flip it towards the middle

 

[Grinderman]

Well I want to be indifferent. Thats my biggest goal in life. Hard so ill keep working on it. Having no attachment is being able to sleep and night.

Indifference here would be putting in practice a Stoic concept : Stop desiring something or someone that is outside of your control pertaining to attaining it / them. Genuinely decide you no longer are interested. Be happy with letting it /them go and feeling like they are not needed.

It's like if you were in prison and as punishment they decided to take something from you, one of your privileges. The trick is to no longer care about the privilege. It no longer interests you. You find something else to focus on. Or just sit at ease.

 

[Datinglife26]

At the beginning of a relationship, the guy usually has to be more interested and the goal is to flip it towards the middle

That's what confused me the most. She asked me to go on a 3rd date. Was all excited on Wednesday and then on Friday night she cancels. Crazy man.

But then again do I really want a girl who is gonna run that hot and then cold on me in 2 days when I haven't done anything to turn her off ?

 

[Glassguy]

You sound bitter as **** man. Jesus who hurt you.

Not bitter at all. Its reality. You just havent learned yet.

You dont chase someone playing games with you. Cancels with no counteroffer is a game that women play with men who they have low interest in. She wasnt ready to drive an hour or spread her legs for you, so she bailed.

Its actually common sense.

 

[Datinglife26]

Indifference here would be putting in practice a Stoic concept : Stop desiring something or someone that is outside of your control pertaining to attaining it / them. Genuinely decide you no longer are interested. Be happy with letting it /them go and feeling like they are not needed.

It's like if you were in prison and as punishment they decided to take something from you, one of your privileges. The trick is to no longer care about the privilege. It no longer interests you. You find something else to focus on. Or just sit at ease.

Yeah man I need to do this.

Indifference here would be putting in practice a Stoic concept : Stop desiring something or someone that is outside of your control pertaining to attaining it / them. Genuinely decide you no longer are interested. Be happy with letting it /them go and feeling like they are not needed.

It's like if you were in prison and as punishment they decided to take something from you, one of your privileges. The trick is to no longer care about the privilege. It no longer interests you. You find something else to focus on. Or just sit at ease.

Yeah this is the response I need. Thanks man

 

[Atom Smasher]

I don’t think it’s effective to make sexual remarks prior to the third date. In your case, OP, I think you scared her away.

In their minds, sex is just supposed to happen spontaneously, as if in the heat of the moment, it just couldn’t be helped. By pre-planning it, you’re triggering the ASD. I’m not surprised at all that she cancelled.

When she brought up sleeping separately you should have said fine. She likely would have come over and then succumbed to your charms. She would then have plausible deniability and her ASD would never have triggered beforehand.

I’d arrange another get-together and this time don’t verbally go down that road. Let it all happen when you have her over there already.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

That's what confused me the most. She asked me to go on a 3rd date. Was all excited on Wednesday and then on Friday night she cancels. Crazy man.

But then again do I really want a girl who is gonna run that hot and then cold on me in 2 days when I haven't done anything to turn her off ?

I'm not going to tell you that you have a change and get taken advantage of, but this girl clearly has a mid to low interest level(she's interested, but testing the waters basically) in you which is normal at the beginning so don't freak out. In fact, if a girl is displaying unreasonable high interest from the start then I would actually be worried. All 3 of my previous girlfriends that I ended the relationships with a ll had rocky starts (flaked on dates, inconsistent interest levels, wouldn't respond to me when I asked them out, and etc). I was talking to other girls and I wasn't scared to walk away and eventually they started putting more investment in to me towards the middle. There will always be other guys that you are competing against too. You aren't against Joe Smith on the street, remember that "single" girls today deem 99% of men as invisible, so you are most likely competing against some athlete, trust fund baby, or Sam Hunt looking mr.fun bartender. These guys are beatable because if I can beat them then you can lol. I'm not saying this will work out towards this girl, but this idea that you are going to meet some girl that will display super high interest from beginning to the end is a fantasy especially in today's dating market.

 

[Glassguy]

That's what confused me the most. She asked me to go on a 3rd date. Was all excited on Wednesday and then on Friday night she cancels.

Let me ask you a question- do you think SHE is confused? Or just you?

 

[Grinderman]

I agree. I have never blocked anyone and I have never deleted anyone from the phone contacts unless the information was invalid no longer needed (not every entry is a former date). The only reason for me to do that is if they actively harass me in some way and cause problems. Otherwise leaving it open and maintaining the contact data lets me know who it is that tried to reach me because it will show who they are. From that point I am a big boy and can decide if I want to respond back to them or not.

Correct.

It is 100% fine to block somebody if they are abusive or harassing you. However, it is a sign of emotional immaturity if you block somebody because you didn't like something they said or something they did.

I'd delete numbers that are no longer relevant but I see no need to block.

A sister of mine confronted a brother over a past issue that should have been long gone (these things often happen when there is a death in the family, emotions run high etc) I pointed out that she was guilty of the same issue and nobody had brought it up with her, so she was being quite hypocritical here.) The response was to block me on whatsapp. Emotionally immature. Did I block her back? No. I wasn't "hurt" by her actions or words. Water off a duck's back. I do view her as a bit of a silly emotional cvnt though.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

At the beginning of a relationship, the guy usually has to be more interested and the goal is to flip it towards the middle

No not really.

 

[Grinderman]

At the beginning of a relationship, the guy usually has to be more interested and the goal is to flip it towards the middle

Where did you get that from? Best if your interest is just slightly below hers. Always. Best for you and best for her. A man who's interest level is too high turns into a stuttering goofball. not a good look. A woman in love is in her element.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

No not really.

Where did you get that from? Best if your interest is just slightly below hers. Always. Best for you and best for her. A man who's interest level is too high turns into a stuttering goofball. not a good look. A woman in love is in her element.

AMS, and by this logic you will never get a girl or only get fat ugly girls/single moms that need to be saved because girls are so entitled and have so many options these days that it is insane to assume a girl to have high interest from the beginning before you have worked game/established a connection with her. If I'm a normal girl that has NFL players and Sam Hunt's in sales chasing me, why would I show consistent high interest in some random dude I just met? Remember, single women disqualify 99.9% of men so the men you are competing against tend to be extraordinary if you ask them. Every girl I've banged, I've had to compete against a young millionaire, athlete, and Chad in the process not some random fat guy that thinks he has a chance.

 

[Grinderman]

If I'm a normal girl that has NFL players and Sam Hunt's in sales chasing her, why would I show consistent high interest in some random dude I just met?

Logical fallacy.

AMS

AMS is making a ton of money from gullible YOUNG impressionable young angry beta males. AMS strokes egos LIKE THE MAJORITY OF so called dating coaches. AMS stirs up your red pill anger and get you pumped up YEAH MAN FVCK THOSE BITACHES!!. I watched a video of him proclaiming to show his "receipts". He was in a restaurant with a BISEXUAL MONEY HUNGRY *****. There was no conversation, it was awkward as fvck. He even had a little whinge that the waiter (a simp in his eyes) poured more wine into the woman's glass than into AMS's glass. His retort was "well he wants to fvck her but I will be fvcking her haha". The guy completely gets his validation from women is obsessed with "looking alpha". The video just seemed to try hard and stunted.

It sounds like you are jading yourself from watching all of this alpha and red pill videos. Take a break if needed. You don't have to take everything they say as gospel. That is the true sign of cultish behavior

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Logical fallacy.



AMS is making a ton of money from gullible YOUNG impressionable young angry beta males. AMS strokes egos LIKE THE MAJORITY OF so called dating coaches. AMS stirs up your red pill anger and get you pumped up YEAH MAN FVCK THOSE BITACHES!!. I watched a video of him proclaiming to show his "receipts". He was in a restaurant with a BISEXUAL MONEY HUNGRY *****. There was no conversation, it was awkward as fvck. He even had a little whinge that the waiter (a simp in his eyes) poured more wine into the woman's glass than into AMS's glass. His retort was "well he wants to fvck her but I will be fvcking her haha". The guy completely gets his validation from women is obsessed with "looking alpha". The video just seemed to try hard and stunted.

It sounds like you are jading yourself from watching all of this alpha and red pill videos. Take a break if needed. You don't have to take everything they say as gospel. That is the true sign of cultish behavior

I don't agree with 95% of his videos tbh. Plus, you can't just dismiss that as a logical fallacy because I have to personally compete against those three type of men(For example, that girl I'm complaining about in my topic has an ex that starts for a NFL team). Like I said before, unless you are going for land whales and desperate single moms, your competition is going to be .1% of men not the average joe.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

AMS, and by this logic you will never get a girl or only get fat ugly girls/single moms that need to be saved because girls are so entitled and have so many options these days that it is insane to assume a girl to have high interest from the beginning before you have worked game/established a connection with her. If I'm a normal girl that has NFL players and Sam Hunt's in sales chasing me, why would I show consistent high interest in some random dude I just met? Remember, single women disqualify 99.9% of men so the men you are competing against tend to be extraordinary if you ask them. Every girl I've banged, I've had to compete against a young millionaire, athlete, and Chad in the process not some random fat guy that thinks he has a chance.

Just stop.

 

[Datinglife26]

Let me ask you a question- do you think SHE is confused? Or just you?

No idea. Probably not. I'm sure she has her reasons. Not that I can figure them out anyway.

Girls asks you out and offers to stay over then goes cold. Sure that will confuse anyone but her. She just wasn't feeling it so whatever. On wards and up wards

 

[Lookatu]

Logical fallacy.



AMS is making a ton of money from gullible YOUNG impressionable young angry beta males. AMS strokes egos LIKE THE MAJORITY OF so called dating coaches. AMS stirs up your red pill anger and get you pumped up YEAH MAN FVCK THOSE BITACHES!!. I watched a video of him proclaiming to show his "receipts". He was in a restaurant with a BISEXUAL MONEY HUNGRY *****. There was no conversation, it was awkward as fvck. He even had a little whinge that the waiter (a simp in his eyes) poured more wine into the woman's glass than into AMS's glass. His retort was "well he wants to fvck her but I will be fvcking her haha". The guy completely gets his validation from women is obsessed with "looking alpha". The video just seemed to try hard and stunted.

It sounds like you are jading yourself from watching all of this alpha and red pill videos. Take a break if needed. You don't have to take everything they say as gospel. That is the true sign of cultish behavior

This.
I've only noticed all the younger newbies lately posting links to his Vids.
Personally I've never watched any PUA/Dating Coaching videos. But I think there's a conflict of interest there as they are also trying to make money, views, subscriptions, etc with that in mind first. I've only come across a couple that's done it out of pure passion.

With SS, you eliminate that conflict of interest as everyone here is genuinely here to try to help/contribute/listen and you have vary levels of people that's actually had experiences of various kinds.

Peeps these days are ever more so relying on articles, reviews, etc. This is how typical people buy products, go on trips, pick hotels, etc. I see this bleeding over when it comes to dating as well. Rather than just jumping in, there's often a lot of analysis paralysis, or fear and hesitation, or decision making purely based on these aspects. We all know there's no guarantees in life but a lot of peeps are trying to seek one. Gone are the days when people used to just go for it and see where things fell. My $.02

 

[Datinglife26]

I don’t think it’s effective to make sexual remarks prior to the third date. In your case, OP, I think you scared her away.

In their minds, sex is just supposed to happen spontaneously, as if in the heat of the moment, it just couldn’t be helped. By pre-planning it, you’re triggering the ASD. I’m not surprised at all that she cancelled.

When she brought up sleeping separately you should have said fine. She likely would have come over and then succumbed to your charms. She would then have plausible deniability and her ASD would never have triggered beforehand.

I’d arrange another get-together and this time don’t verbally go down that road. Let it all happen when you have her over there already.

I did agree my remarks were sexual but teasing that she wouldn't trust herself staying over. Her asking me to sleep on the couch was obviously a joke...sarcasm.. This is nothing strange. We were close to banging on our second date when she had to leave. Yes I could have sealed the deal earlier if I knew she would have to leave. But she offered to stay the night before she got a call. It was playful banter and I've used it many times before and always gotten laid. So I don't buy that and it's nitpicking to blame that.

Anyway beyond that I can try to arrange something again and see. Sometimes you can do everything right but she has **** of her own going on. Or other guys.

I think we all like to point fingers and blame each other for minor things. But ever think about the girls you were successful with and then think of all the mistakes you could get away with ?

Dating shouldn't be walking a tight rope and ruined if you put one foot wrong when you do most things right.

 

[Lookatu]

You're expending an awful a lot of energy thinking and discussing this over one girl.

The thirst is real...

 

[Datinglife26]

You're expending an awful a lot of energy thinking and discussing this over one girl.

The thirst is real...

Oh wow great comment. This entire website is to help men better their understanding and game to reduce the energy spent.

You are on here because your ass was once thirsty about some girl too. So instead of making ****ty comments like this why don't you leave the website since you don't need to put any time or energy into bettering yourself since you are perfect already