I Dumped My GF Today On Her Birthday

[mrgoodstuff]

Hey man i really appreciate your words there.. means alot and makes allot of sense.

Its true, i need to stay true to my principles!


I imagined we could have a life together.. and there would be an understanding between us, and she wanted the same as me..

Only two weeks ago, she asked me what my expectations are in a relationship, what my do's and dont's are, as she is my GF and she wanted to know.. We was talking about living together so things was getting serious!

I explained to her i'm easy going about most things, the only thing that wouldn't make me happy is, my partner going out to bars regular and getting drunk.

I explained i don't mind the odd night out here or there.. ocassions, birthdays, or a drink with friends.. but going out to bars regular, getting drunk etc, is not a good thing for a healthy relationship in the long run.

And she agreed with me..

After i dumped her.. she left a voice mail stating.. i don't like bieng told where i can go.. WTF

Well i will leave her to it now, she can get smashed in as many bars as she like now.. not my problem anymore!

Right, smashed in the alcohol, and her punany when she feels like it.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I highly suggest you read the no contact thread starting at the very beginning and all the way through. There are great stories of men's transformations through staying no contact, detailing their up and down struggles, as well as plenty of examples of men who thought they might be the exception and recontacted their ex only to experience tremendous regret and they explain why.

When you find yourself thinking of her, start reading there and keep going back and read some more when thoughts of her pop up.

Dedicate the next 60 days to No Contact and you will be a changed man at the end of it.

If you are not exercising everyday now, start today. Help dissipate any tension/frustration/anger/etc out through intense exertion/exercise. The endorphins and self care will serve your transformation as well.

You guys current "equilibrium" is with you getting the short long end of the stick plugged up your rectum. There is nothing to go back there for, the balance doesn't work for you.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

UPDATE..

She sent me a text message today, and curiosity got the better of me, so i read it..

HER - I sent a parcel out to you with your CDs in it, did you get it?

She sent that today.. there is another 9 messages on my whatsapp that i have not even read...

So tempted to read them grrrr but i know mostly nothing good will come out of it.

Part of me wants to have her apologise and make up with me.. but doubt that will happen and what future have i got with a woman who didn't give a fuk about my feelings at all, and treated me like chit

I really cared for this woman, feels like she didn't give a fuk about me

She might have cared for you if you cared more about yourself.

 

[soulforge]

She might have cared for you if you cared more about yourself.

Dude i do care about myself, why do u think i dropped her..

I'm just very angry with myself for getting emotionally attached to a woman, when there was clear red flags about her commitment to me.

There was warning signs in the past that i ignored, looking back now, i should have walked away or downgraded to FB

Right now all i can think about is Fuking her lol.... maybe i should have downgraded her to fuk buddy.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Dude i do care about myself, why do u think i dropped her..

I'm just very angry with myself for getting emotionally attached to a woman, when there was clear red flags about her commitment to me.

There was warning signs in the past that i ignored, looking back now, i should have walked away or downgraded to FB

Right now all i can think about is Fuking her lol.... maybe i should have downgraded her to fuk buddy.

No. I think she's too prickly. It's not worth it. There will be women all into you for that. This was into herself and hanging with her friends. She did it at your inconvenience. I don't think the sex would be that great with that mindset.

 

[soulforge]

She might have cared for you if you cared more about yourself.

You seem to have the wrong impression, that i have been putting up with disrespect from this woman for ages.. not true!

There was around 2 incidences in the past, that i found disrespectful, and on both occasion i called her out on it.. just this incident was too serious to let her get away with

 

[mrgoodstuff]

You seem to have the wrong impression, that i have been putting up with disrespect from this woman for ages.. not true!

There was around 2 incidences in the past, that i found disrespectful, and on both occasion i called her out on it.. just this incident was too serious to let her get away with

Be broke up with her for at least a month. If you do decide to waste time on her in the future it's sex only. So she can come over or you can go over, but the transaction usually ends up in sex. Don't let her waste her time, and you can't care about her as "your woman" as long as she's hanging in the bars, actually I wouldn't worry about that part.

 

[soulforge]

UPDATE..

I have now read all the whatsapp messages she sent me..

No apology from her, no sense of wrong doing or remorse..

Just simply asking for my apartment number, so she can send my stuff back to me.. and she sent a funny pic.

Can't believe i wasted 6 months of my life on a person like this.. WTF was i thinking..

 

[mrgoodstuff]

UPDATE..

I have now read all the whatsapp messages she sent me..

No apology from her, no sense of wrong doing or remorse..

Just simply asking for my apartment number, so she can send my stuff back to me.. and she sent a funny pic.

Can't believe i wasted 6 months of my life on a person like this.. WTF was i thinking..

She's obviously living "fun and games". You can **** her, that's about it.

 

[soulforge]

I know everyone has advised me NC.. But would it be worthwhile explaining to her, what she did, how she made me feel? So she understands my side of things

Right now, she has just painted me as the bad guy, who dumped her on her birthday.. there has been no apology, or romorse or understanding for why i had to walk away..

Or better to just keep ignoring and strict NC

 

[SamTheHobit]

I know everyone has advised me NC.. But would it be worthwhile explaining to her, what she did, how she made me feel? So she understands my side of things

Right now, she has just painted me as the bad guy, who dumped her on her birthday.. there has been no apology, or romorse or understanding for why i had to walk away..

Or better to just keep ignoring and strict NC

Perhaps its best to let her know what you're feeling.

Looks like you need closure or something.

 

[Tictac]

I know everyone has advised me NC.. But would it be worthwhile explaining to her, what she did, how she made me feel? So she understands my side of things

Right now, she has just painted me as the bad guy, who dumped her on her birthday.. there has been no apology, or romorse or understanding for why i had to walk away..

Or better to just keep ignoring and strict NC

Before, I said that you were getting pathetic.

You've arrived at pathetic. There is not one person here that did anything other than tell you that you did the right thing leaving her and that you should keep going.

And here you are NINE PAGES LATER begging to go and talk to her.

You will do ANYTHING to stay in orbit around this drunk.

So just go back to her already.

And stop posting this sh*t. It is truly pathetic.

 

[l_e_g_e_n_d]

Right now, she has just painted me as the bad guy, who dumped her on her birthday.. there has been no apology, or romorse or understanding for why i had to walk away..

Nature has it that women are least physically adept between the sexes. This is because they don't need physical power (even in the primitive era) as they are natural manipulators. Men communicate overtly (I.e. I do what I say, I say what I mean. Women communicate covertly (I.e. I do what I want you to perceive, I say what I want you to perceive).

If the man were the head, the woman is the neck who could turn and steer the head.

Don't be a fool.

 

[dude99]

It would not be worth while explaining things to her. All you're going to do is valiate her and answer her question "am i still in his head." And you will give her an ego boost and sense of power over you. Explaining how you feel to her is telling her she won and then she will do what she has wanted to do all along. Blame you.

 

[soulforge]

It would not be worth while explaining things to her. All you're going to do is valiate her and answer her question "am i still in his head." And you will give her an ego boost and sense of power over you. Explaining how you feel to her is telling her she won and then she will do what she has wanted to do all along. Blame you.

I hear what your saying.. i am sure she knows how she behaved that night was seriously fuked up.. any issues she had, she could have spoke to me privately about them like an adult.. but she chose the disrespectful route instead.

I must admit i do feel a c@nt for dumping her on her birthday and for not explaining exactly why i did it... but any decent woman would have already figuered it out and apologised by now!

Add further insult to injury, she left a voice mail claiming she was going to end it anyway, and that i was not right for her etc..

Also she suggested i was some kind of scrounger, because i did not pay my way for things when we was out..

Man i been going through some financial hardship, and still paid for things most of the time..

I thought a good girlfriend is meant to be a little supportive towards her man, when he is going through a hard spot.. wtf

 

[MrWiggles]

So I've been lurking here for awhile now and reading your posts...I don't want to be harsh but jesus christ dude get the eff over it. I used to be and still sometimes am as beta as the came but this is on another level. Just move on and focus on other things like your financial situation that you keep bringing up. She keeps saying crap to bring you down and yet you still want to be with her. Just block all contacts with her on your phone/whatsapp etc... just move the f*ck on and find somebody else jesus effin christ

and for the record, somebody else said it, but the reason she WAS acting out was because you were being an insecure person to begin with and you still are. If you stopped worrying about her hanging out in bars and being hit on or whatever it is went on in your head then she wouldn't have been doing those things. YOU drove her to it. Go ahead and accept that now and start over with a new girl. stop creating stories in your head when a girl wants to go out to a bar with her gfs

 

[soulforge]

So I've been lurking here for awhile now and reading your posts...I don't want to be harsh but jesus christ dude get the eff over it. I used to be and still sometimes am as beta as the came but this is on another level. Just move on and focus on other things like your financial situation that you keep bringing up. She keeps saying crap to bring you down and yet you still want to be with her. Just block all contacts with her on your phone/whatsapp etc... just move the f*ck on and find somebody else jesus effin christ

and for the record, somebody else said it, but the reason she WAS acting out was because you were being an insecure person to begin with and you still are. If you stopped worrying about her hanging out in bars and being hit on or whatever it is went on in your head then she wouldn't have been doing those things. YOU drove her to it. Go ahead and accept that now and start over with a new girl. stop creating stories in your head when a girl wants to go out to a bar with her gfs

Dude i never once in the six months i was seeing her, said to her that i disaprove of her going to bars..

We was getting serious and talking about living together,

she bought up the subject of, what our do's and dont's are in a relationship around 2 weeks ago..

So we got talking.. all i said was i don't mind her going to bars sometimes, but if its something regular getting drunk then i don't believe it would be a healthy thing in a relationship.

We both talked openly it.. and i still believe your girlfriend getting drunk in bars in a committed relationship is not a good thing.

 

[MrWiggles]

I suggest you get the eff over it... starting by not replying to this thread or making another thread about the same subject. Throw out anything that has to do with her. There has been solid advice in this thread yet you keep going back and bringing sh*t up. I don't even know if I should believe that she is the one that keeps texting you and not the other way around. Maybe it'll make it easier to think that she was "cheating" on you this whole time or she is bouncing up and down on someones meat pole right now so who cares about this broad. It sounds harsh but you need to drill that in your head

 

[soulforge]

I suggest you get the eff over it... starting by not replying to this thread or making another thread about the same subject. Throw out anything that has to do with her. There has been solid advice in this thread yet you keep going back and bringing sh*t up. I don't even know if I should believe that she is the one that keeps texting you and not the other way around. Maybe it'll make it easier to think that she was "cheating" on you this whole time or she is bouncing up and down on someones meat pole right now so who cares about this broad. It sounds harsh but you need to drill that in your head

If i want to come on here to get some advice and encourmant from fellow djs... then it has fuk all to do with you.. its an open forum and...

If you don't like my threads etc.. don't fukin read them.

 

[MrWiggles]

the problem is they HAVE given you advice and encouragement... yes get mad show you have some balls