Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
You can't take an observation from a tiny sample of women and extrapolate to all women. Leaving aside those truly masculine women who thrive climbing the corporate ladder, the rest of those single ladies self medicate with wine or are on anti depressants, have cats/dogs as surrogates for men and generally are unhappy human beings.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I try to see them about once a week, but it doesn't always work out due to schedule conflicts etc. Also, most of them are escorting only a short period of time (often during university studies) and then move on to other things in life.
I don't know, perhaps single women are not happy, but most of them certainly are not making any effort to attract a man. If they were truly interested in men, the first thing they would do is to get in shape (because all women know that's what attracts men).
Okay, so we have established your tastes of younger University age women. But you are 38 years old. Are you going for like 30 min / incall, or longer periods? What is your monthly budget? Why would you want a civvie women if you are meeting a hot Stacie University woman like that every week? You have made a ceiling with that lifestyle as you are not going to get the same type of women you are seeing through that arrangment and I think you have spoiled yourself out of the dating market. Most people on dating apps have to settle with 3-4 points lower than themselves.
"Social skills" amount to being a phony, vacuous extrovert. I can't advise anyone not to practice them -- failure to do so will come with consequences. But declining to debase yourself in that way is laudable.
Nope...social skills amount to understanding how to act with other people in public settings. Trust me when I say "being normal" never got you so far as it does today with the amount of weirdos and dudes that have zero social skills in person.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
That is precisely what I described.
I think you are a bit too curious/concerned about my lifestyle. I love beautiful women and I love sex. Not all of them are university age, either, some are between 25-35. Also, high quality escorts don't do incall or short visits.
Eh, idk. Any/all? Can't say I feel entirely at home in any of those buckets. BP tends to be fixated on looks, which in my experience is just wrong. RP, I subscribe to descriptively more than prescriptively. MGTOW, maybe, probably heading in that direction as life marches towards its dyspeptic conclusion. Tbh, I think the incels are right about most everything, and most everyone is just too egotistical and cowardly to admit it.
That's nothing like you described actually
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
The problem with talking to escorts is that you might not catch what works and what not during conversation. And continue to be socially awkward (not saying OP is)
You said that social skills amount to conforming to social expectations. Social expectations in North America require you to emulate extroversion, conceal your true opinions and feelings (mandatory positivity), pretend to care more about people than you actually do, and make small talk about things that you likely find uninteresting. Ergo...
And it's incredible to me just how much of a disqualifier any hint of 'neurodivergence' so often is. It can cancel out everything else, even if everything else is solidly above average.
You sound like a person who has no clue how this works. Clearly you have issues with social skills.
You mean like autistic? Nah, I function quite well socially and like I mentioned above, never had trouble making friends. Also, I've had relationships in my younger years with normal women.
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
There are, but they're still greatly outnumbered by their male counterparts. Moreover, they don't face anything approaching the discrimination by the opposite sex that male neurodivergents do. In the latter case, it's pretty much open season from all quarters.
I have every clue how this works. What you're trying to do is rationalize the possession of a set of qualities and behaviors that are, at best, morally neutral as something laudable that makes you superior, when by any reasonable moral criteria they are not.
This has nothing to do with morals and every thing to do with mingling well with others in a social setting.
I'm not disputing their utility. I'm just saying that they're a necessary evil.
I’m in the exact same boat as you. However I can “turn it on” whenever I feel like it. The problem is I don’t feel like it as much as I used to.
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.