Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
You wear a vest? Interesting. I always thought plad shirts, dark jeans, and nice shoes were enough.mangotot said:I get checked out a lot especially when dressed nice. If I am dresses like this: http://www.laindiefashion.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/download-1.jpg I get checked out a lot (that picture is not me). Always wondered if it's the outfit or me they are looking at.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
You have accessrize with things like chains, bracelets, scarfs, belts etc. Sometimes chicks smile at me and sometimes as I walk by an attractive woman I look at her, she look at me and passes, 10 yards down the street I stop and turn around to look at her and she has done exactly the same. Until a year ago I didn't realise the power of being in shape and dressing sharp. An average face will do, there is no need for model looks. During the daytime even if I open a very hot chicks badly as in too quiet voice etc they still respond well. In the past these same women would just walk past even if I opened really well.Frayzer said:You wear a vest? Interesting. I always thought plad shirts, dark jeans, and nice shoes were enough.
Where do you buy your clothes at?mangotot said:You have accessrize with things like chains, bracelets, scarfs, belts etc. Sometimes chicks smile at me and sometimes as I walk by an attractive woman I look at her, she look at me and passes, 10 yards down the street I stop and turn around to look at her and she has done exactly the same. Until a year ago I didn't realise the power of being in shape and dressing sharp. An average face will do, there is no need for model looks. During the daytime even if I open a very hot chicks badly as in too quiet voice etc they still respond well. In the past these same women would just walk past even if I opened really well.
I must get checked out at least 30 times a day when dressed well. Admittidly this is in the busier areas where there are lots of people.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Mid end designer like Hugo boss, Calvin Klein and All Saints.Frayzer said:Where do you buy your clothes at?
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.