"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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how many oppurtunities do you have to impress a girl?

tsmith2334

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how many chances do you have to impress a girl?

on average... how many dates would you say you have to really wow a girl before she loses interest totally... my guess would be between 1 and 3 (depending on the girl)...

what's the verdict here?
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Bvbidd

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Yeah. But then if you cut contact and wait awhile, you usually can get a second chance.
 

tsmith2334

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Bvbidd said:
Yeah. But then if you cut contact and wait awhile, you usually can get a second chance.
You know what I was thinking the same thing... any one else have an estimate to how many "chances" your given?
 

Monkey

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Bvbidd said:
Yeah. But then if you cut contact and wait awhile, you usually can get a second chance.

Cutting contact and waiting a while won't increase her interest level IF it was low after date one. Shes already forgotten about you and dating other guys...
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Bvbidd

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I'm not talking about some random stranger and no it won't increase her interest level, She'll just give you another chance.
 

tsmith2334

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The Sperminator said:
Usually one shot.
oh yea? just one shot?

i guess it all depends... what if you didn't "wow" her but she enjoyed herself and had a fun time?
 

ElStud

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I never try to impress girls, I don't need to.
 

reset

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Aren't you supposed to hope the girl will end up impressing you?
 

Bonhomme

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reset stole the words right from my typing finger...
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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hbxdoode

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depend on the girl... if she's a slut and wants sex if you dont wow her the first time then you're done. but if she's a sweet girl, maybe it'll take some time to actually get to know someone, then perhaps you'll get more chances
 

tsmith2334

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reset said:
Aren't you supposed to hope the girl will end up impressing you?
i know i know, and i know your supposed to date as many girls as possible.. but if your particularly interested in one (just a healthy interest) you want to get their attention too...

i'm just wondering, how many dates are you capable of landing until the girl "nexts" you.. in other words your just not cutting it to her liking... (worst case scenario, obviously).. 1? 2?

and can you lay low for a little while and spark interest again down the road?
 

NickSCFC2000

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You should think about it the other way around, you want the girl to wow you.

Your dates will go alot better if you think of it that way instead.
 

tsmith2334

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NickSCFC2000 said:
You should think about it the other way around, you want the girl to wow you.

Your dates will go alot better if you think of it that way instead.
Advice taken! But, here's the thing... it wasn't like a blind date or anything.. I knew the girl pretty well... she finally broke things off with her boyfriend... and I took her out to dinner... so I kind of viewed it as my big chance...

and while things went pretty well and I'm sure she had a fun time (she contacted me first a few hours later, thanking me and saying she had a good time)... i doubt the "wow" factor was there (due to my nervousness, missing the ex, etc.)...

which is pretty much the basis of what i'm wondering here... are girls quick to give out second (or third) chances for you to steal their heart?
 

Bvbidd

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If you sit on your ass and wait for her to impress you then she'll think your boring and move on.

Don't listen to these guys, they have no idea.

In the end, your still working for her pvssy. Sorry that's just how it works.

Thinking your so great doesn't do much if your not actually great.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

tsmith2334

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Bvbidd said:
If you sit on your ass and wait for her to impress you then she'll think your boring and move on.

Don't listen to these guys, they have no idea.

In the end, your still working for her pvssy. Sorry that's just how it works.

Thinking your so great doesn't do much if your not actually great.
hey, if you don't mind, read what i posted above and let me know what you think i can do to increase my chances of a second date... maybe she has no problems with a second date at all and i'm just paranoid... right now, i'm just taking it easy... we both go to different colleges... so i contact her once every couple of weeks so she doesn't forget about me completely
 

Bvbidd

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I think you can relax and that she'll do a second date. She sent you that txt out of nowhere. Just ask her along somewhere.
 

tsmith2334

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Bvbidd said:
I think you can relax and that she'll do a second date. She sent you that txt out of nowhere. Just ask her along somewhere.
it was an IM, that still cool? i was away & idle.. it was like 11ish (we were done with dinner at 7) and i got it the next morning. she said "thank youuu i had a good time!!!" <-exclamation points and all

i've texted her since then and she's replied so perhaps it is all gravy..

thanks for the reassurance by the way

oh and anyone else with advice, feel free to drop some DJ knowledge
 

sam3083

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After being in the game a while, my opinion has begun to resemble Bvbidd's;

If you sit on your ass and wait for her to impress you then she'll think your boring and move on.

Don't listen to these guys, they have no idea.

In the end, your still working for her pvssy. Sorry that's just how it works.

Thinking your so great doesn't do much if your not actually great.

You really have to do something, or the chick will just think your boring. It's all well and good to "be the prize", but you have to work your ass off to make the first attraction. Then worry about disinterest, and whatever.
 

reset

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tsmith2334 said:
i know i know, and i know your supposed to date as many girls as possible..
I'm not just giving you stock answers here. It really IS about how they can impress you. When you qualify a girl, it sets you up as a challenge, and it makes it fun for her as she works to earn your attention.

Girls know right away if they want you or not, at least on that gut, primal level. You don't have to work your ass off at anything. That's just totally backwards.

Doing this stuff IS how you impress her. Don't ever qualify yourself to a girl. That's not how nature works.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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