"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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how many oppurtunities do you have to impress a girl?

tsmith2334

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how many chances do you have to impress a girl?

on average... how many dates would you say you have to really wow a girl before she loses interest totally... my guess would be between 1 and 3 (depending on the girl)...

what's the verdict here?
 
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"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Bvbidd

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Yeah. But then if you cut contact and wait awhile, you usually can get a second chance.
 

tsmith2334

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Bvbidd said:
Yeah. But then if you cut contact and wait awhile, you usually can get a second chance.
You know what I was thinking the same thing... any one else have an estimate to how many "chances" your given?
 

Monkey

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Bvbidd said:
Yeah. But then if you cut contact and wait awhile, you usually can get a second chance.

Cutting contact and waiting a while won't increase her interest level IF it was low after date one. Shes already forgotten about you and dating other guys...
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Bvbidd

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I'm not talking about some random stranger and no it won't increase her interest level, She'll just give you another chance.
 

tsmith2334

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The Sperminator said:
Usually one shot.
oh yea? just one shot?

i guess it all depends... what if you didn't "wow" her but she enjoyed herself and had a fun time?
 

ElStud

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I never try to impress girls, I don't need to.
 

reset

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Aren't you supposed to hope the girl will end up impressing you?
 

Bonhomme

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reset stole the words right from my typing finger...
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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hbxdoode

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depend on the girl... if she's a slut and wants sex if you dont wow her the first time then you're done. but if she's a sweet girl, maybe it'll take some time to actually get to know someone, then perhaps you'll get more chances
 

tsmith2334

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reset said:
Aren't you supposed to hope the girl will end up impressing you?
i know i know, and i know your supposed to date as many girls as possible.. but if your particularly interested in one (just a healthy interest) you want to get their attention too...

i'm just wondering, how many dates are you capable of landing until the girl "nexts" you.. in other words your just not cutting it to her liking... (worst case scenario, obviously).. 1? 2?

and can you lay low for a little while and spark interest again down the road?
 

NickSCFC2000

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You should think about it the other way around, you want the girl to wow you.

Your dates will go alot better if you think of it that way instead.
 

tsmith2334

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NickSCFC2000 said:
You should think about it the other way around, you want the girl to wow you.

Your dates will go alot better if you think of it that way instead.
Advice taken! But, here's the thing... it wasn't like a blind date or anything.. I knew the girl pretty well... she finally broke things off with her boyfriend... and I took her out to dinner... so I kind of viewed it as my big chance...

and while things went pretty well and I'm sure she had a fun time (she contacted me first a few hours later, thanking me and saying she had a good time)... i doubt the "wow" factor was there (due to my nervousness, missing the ex, etc.)...

which is pretty much the basis of what i'm wondering here... are girls quick to give out second (or third) chances for you to steal their heart?
 

Bvbidd

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If you sit on your ass and wait for her to impress you then she'll think your boring and move on.

Don't listen to these guys, they have no idea.

In the end, your still working for her pvssy. Sorry that's just how it works.

Thinking your so great doesn't do much if your not actually great.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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tsmith2334

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Bvbidd said:
If you sit on your ass and wait for her to impress you then she'll think your boring and move on.

Don't listen to these guys, they have no idea.

In the end, your still working for her pvssy. Sorry that's just how it works.

Thinking your so great doesn't do much if your not actually great.
hey, if you don't mind, read what i posted above and let me know what you think i can do to increase my chances of a second date... maybe she has no problems with a second date at all and i'm just paranoid... right now, i'm just taking it easy... we both go to different colleges... so i contact her once every couple of weeks so she doesn't forget about me completely
 

Bvbidd

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I think you can relax and that she'll do a second date. She sent you that txt out of nowhere. Just ask her along somewhere.
 

tsmith2334

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Bvbidd said:
I think you can relax and that she'll do a second date. She sent you that txt out of nowhere. Just ask her along somewhere.
it was an IM, that still cool? i was away & idle.. it was like 11ish (we were done with dinner at 7) and i got it the next morning. she said "thank youuu i had a good time!!!" <-exclamation points and all

i've texted her since then and she's replied so perhaps it is all gravy..

thanks for the reassurance by the way

oh and anyone else with advice, feel free to drop some DJ knowledge
 

sam3083

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After being in the game a while, my opinion has begun to resemble Bvbidd's;

If you sit on your ass and wait for her to impress you then she'll think your boring and move on.

Don't listen to these guys, they have no idea.

In the end, your still working for her pvssy. Sorry that's just how it works.

Thinking your so great doesn't do much if your not actually great.

You really have to do something, or the chick will just think your boring. It's all well and good to "be the prize", but you have to work your ass off to make the first attraction. Then worry about disinterest, and whatever.
 

reset

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tsmith2334 said:
i know i know, and i know your supposed to date as many girls as possible..
I'm not just giving you stock answers here. It really IS about how they can impress you. When you qualify a girl, it sets you up as a challenge, and it makes it fun for her as she works to earn your attention.

Girls know right away if they want you or not, at least on that gut, primal level. You don't have to work your ass off at anything. That's just totally backwards.

Doing this stuff IS how you impress her. Don't ever qualify yourself to a girl. That's not how nature works.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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