Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
None of the behaviors you mentioned is gaslighting, as I said I think your definition is way too broad. Gaslighting is to lie and make the victim doubt themselves so much that they'll believe the lies. That's all there is to the definition of gaslighting.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
That's part of it but as a whole, the goal of gaslighting is to throw people off balance so you can get your way. That includes things like attention drawing fights, passive agressive behavior, running you down to people to get them on their side and generally having them abandon you.
agreed, not sure what the hell that other jagoff is talking about. What I've defined is what I live through and what gaslighting is. Don't try and tell someone who goes through it on a regular basis that they don't know what gaslighting is.
Ok, now we agree on the definition in a clear way!
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
not sure what to tell you. perhaps you've been luckier than most as it relates to dealing with women. women are naturals at gaslighting. that's also why they have higher rates of mental illness than men. it's hardwired in them to have emotional issues.
Gawd damn. I listened to those Eddie Murphy's. So we was already done in the late 80s. I was lucky to have had good women late 80s to early 2000s.
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
I think so... we've sped up the process 33% now.
