That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Alpha male telling a girl you can't live without her? Now that's a paradox.I'll probably get slammed for this How does a alpha male tell a girl he's been thinking of her ?
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
That's because there's a systemic misunderstanding of what "alpha" is, which is really actually a paternal frame. Mark Manson refers to this as a lack of neediness and healthy vulnerability. Put into PUA\RP terms, this is a combination of abundance mentality and not engaging in covert contracts. Most of what is described as "alpha" in these forums can simply be described as "the opposite of a nice guy" which is not necessarily alpha. Lots of overcompensation and misattribution. If a girl has to pick between an unbridled psychopath and a niceguy, she'll choose Charles Manson most of the time.The Alpha male doesn't do this, which is why most women will fvck him 3 or 4 times and then move on because they don't view him as relationship material.
If that is your goal, then great. If not, I'd advise doing a few beta things once in a while to show a softer side they can relate better to...there is nothing wrong with telling a woman you are seeing you have been thinking of her, as long as you haven't been acting like a needy little b!tch the rest of the time.
That's the issue here...people don't understand context. You CANNOT be "Alpha" all the time if you want a relationship. You simply cannot. It won't work. That strategy will get you laid. But you will be viewed as untrustworthy and a guy that simply goes around and sleeps with every woman you meet. That works for a short period of time, but not for very long with the same woman. If that's what you want, then great.
If it's not then you have to moderate your "Alpha"ness with some softer Beta tendencies. It's not going to be viewed as weak or non-Alpha, its going to be viewed as you letting her get to know you a little better and being able to see the "real" you...you know the one she is going to fall for...
This Alpha all the time BS is just that...BS, spewed by people who don't understand context of what they are doing.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.