How do you gain Value

[Ease]

'Gaining value' seems to be the answer for everything for some guys.

What does it mean? Spit your game and share your ideas so us fools may become educated.

 

[S.U.R.F.]

I wrote this big post about this, then it got deleted.
It had everything, societyal values, my own personal experience. But thats really redundant to the question anyways.

What is value?

Value is what is good, value is what we want. Value has to be defined. Value can be defined by society, your parents, anyone. Value is what makes you special, value is what makes people happy and fulfilled. We buy things that are valuable.

Most people choose to believe what society defines value to be. This is why everyone goes on the rat race to get the Benz or the Beamer. Its kind of sad. Parental values are messed up too, especially for asians and people with tough parents. Its hard to get out of that one.

How do you gain value?

In my juvenile opinion, you do not. You decide what value is, therefore you ARE value. When you are value, why the hell would you need to gain value.

When you say...I lack value, I need to gain value. Your thinking is ALREADY flawed. Think about it, you say you WANT value. Yet, who decides when you are gaining or losing value? I don't know the answer, but I'll tell you this, its not YOU. You decide what value is, you become VALUE itself, and you do not accept what anyone else (society) think value is. Therefore, you do not need to gain value. You are the ruler that value is measured by, you do not need to grow because you are what everything else is measured against.

I mean, its really your world, your life, your consciousness. Its pretty weird that we have to like, listen to what other people think about whats valuable, and place ourselves accordingly. Am I right?

Summary, you do not gain value, you ARE value. Ironically, those who think "how do I gain value" will never have TRUE value. By true value I mean something that does not weaken with time or when your in the presense of sophisicated people.

surf.

Or, this is just the philosophical rantings of a teen who is not good looking, so he is trying to find an excuse for himself. Either way, you decide what value is, or you will try to gain value forever.

 

[GreatHornedOwl]

Value... is being the center of attention.

The star quarterback of the football team in highschool. That's a lot of value, but why? Because he's the leader. All eyes are on him.

Take a guy that drives a fast car. A fast car turns heads, it draws attention.

The guy that gets a lot of girls. He draws more girls because they're aware he's getting noticed from other girls.

Value is being in the spotlight.

 

[Maxtro]

And how do you get to be in the spotlight? What can an average guy do?

 

[zekko]

If she knows that other girls will be envious of her for being with you, then you have value in her eyes.

There is some variation in what an individual woman thinks have value. It could be:

Looks.
A great body.
Money.
A good career.
Potential for a good career (going to medical school for example).
You could be a fun guy that everybody likes.
You could have a lot of friends (lets her experience a wide set of social circles).
You could be a big strong guy that makes her feel safe and protected when she's with you.
You could have some sort of fame or notoriety:
You could be a good baseball player who looks good in his uniform and she likes to hang out with the other girls in the bleachers and watch.
You could be the lead singer of a popular local rock band.
Heck, you could have a very thick penis that all the girls talk about.

It could be any number of things. Some you just have to be lucky to have, but others you can achieve with hard work.

 

[Maxtro]

OK, so the categories for value are.

Looks:
A great body, a big strong guy that makes her feel safe and protected when she's with you.

Money or potential for it:
A good career or potential for a good career (going to medical school for example)

Fame:
Athlete, or some kind of performer

Social:
Be a fun guy that everybody likes and have a lot of friends and be well connected.

So I guess social value is the easiest one to achieve. Of course, if one doesn't know what they are doing, it might as well be impossible.

 

[GreatHornedOwl]

Let me just add...

I don't think value applies in every situation. Example: Let's say the star QB of a high school team approached a random girl in the mall. The girl he approached doesn't know he's a QB. That doesn't mean he doesn't have value, it means it's just not relevant to that situation.

 

[zekko]

I don't think value applies in every situation. Example: Let's say the star QB of a high school team approached a random girl in the mall. The girl he approached doesn't know he's a QB. That doesn't mean he doesn't have value, it means it's just not relevant to that situation.

True, it applies less in cold approaches. That's why so much pickup material focuses on trying to display (or fake) that you are a high value male.

If you're just looking for a one night stand, it doesn't matter so much if you are high value (except confidence-wise). If you want her to stick around longer it might.

Obviously the more obvious characteristics, those than can be readily seen, can still matter - looks, height, a great physique, social proof, maybe you're a sharp dresser or a great dancer, etc.

 

[Maxtro]

And how do you get to be in the spotlight? What can an average guy do?

Anybody going to answer this? It was the whole point of the thread.

Aside from being an athlete, performer, rich or being really good looking. How does a normal guy get enough value to attract women?

There has to be a way to start from the bottom and work oneself up.

 

[Iceberg]

Anybody going to answer this? It was the whole point of the thread.

Aside from being an athlete, performer, rich or being really good looking. How does a normal guy get enough value to attract women?

There has to be a way to start from the bottom and work oneself up.

You work out. Get in shape.

You pick up a hobby that you're passionate about. Painting. Guitar. Cars. Whatever.

Travel. See the world. Have some stories to tell.

And don't do these things for women. Do them because it makes you an awesome person. You don't want to talk around talking about yourself all day....the goal is to carry yourself like a man of value because IN YOUR MIND you are a man of value. And when the situation arise, you'll display that value.

I can be in the spotlight because when the situation calls for it, I can tell a good story about some adventure I was on. Or I can talk about music I listen to....and the music I can play on guitar or piano. I work as a writer in advertising, a cool industry and a cool job...that's something to talk about. I grew up shy, but forced myself to experience a lot of things and now I can carry interesting discussions with people because of the things I experienced. And I think that's your definition of spotlight - being able to keep the crowd entertained/interested.

But the key is this: I didn't do these things to get girls. I did them because they were my passions and I knew it would make me a more interesting person overall. A man with passion is the man who gets the spotlight. Your passion shouldn't be women. The women will come once you have other passions.

Does that make sense? Does that help?

 

[Trader]

Let me just add...

I don't think value applies in every situation. Example: Let's say the star QB of a high school team approached a random girl in the mall. The girl he approached doesn't know he's a QB. That doesn't mean he doesn't have value, it means it's just not relevant to that situation.

With regards to this discussion, I PMed you with a secret

 

[Ease]

The word 'value' is misused.

A better way of describing what this forum refers to when they say 'value', is alpha masculinity and social status.

Alphaness and social status are interlinked, the key to social status is alphaness.

 

[yuppaz]

cocaine and a big d*ck mayne...hahahaha nah. I would say that for me when no social circle is available it's about charisma and just going with the flow and showing that you are comfortable in your own skin, and that you can make them feel. Making them feel a range of emotions is valuable to girlies. Embarrassed, Horny, Laughing, Angry, appreciated etc. and what ease said above

 

[nismo-4]

OK, so the categories for value are.

Looks:
A great body, a big strong guy that makes her feel safe and protected when she's with you.

Money or potential for it:
A good career or potential for a good career (going to medical school for example)

Fame:
Athlete, or some kind of performer

Social:
Be a fun guy that everybody likes and have a lot of friends and be well connected.

So I guess social value is the easiest one to achieve. Of course, if one doesn't know what they are doing, it might as well be impossible.

Maxtro, listen to what Iceberg said. All of those things you listed raise your value, and they help a lot because of the market value of pu$$y. And Judge nismo agrees.

In New Orleans, I got popular in college with the sororities, I had a pimped out car, I knew how to fix cars, I played tennis, I was smart, I had connections to just about anything most people wanted in the city, like car audio (things to pimp rides), drugs, strippers, hookers, hitmen, I had the hookups for damn everything. And I used to make money off ebay and delivering pizzas, f**king some of my customers after work!

Most guys work out for the looks factor and they get more attention and dates easier. (Hint, they're less likely to get "I have a boyfriend") Some get plastic surgery. Women want something nice to look at and have good looking kids. If you're ugly, the woman might not let you get very far with her, and that's if she lets you near her.

Some guys play the lottery because they know if they hit it, they'll be very trendy, have a really nice car that stands out, etc. Women love rich guys cuz they can do more and be more creative than the average guy. He'll speak from the heart with good intentions, but since the rich guy has more actual things to offer and the money to prove it, 99/100 women will keep the rich guy. Even if he's a late night infomercial scammer, she won't care. Money equals power, pu$$y, and pleasure.

Then there are guys who find it easy to get fame/popularity. I've known guys who play sports and rap just because of that. Unsurprisingly, they spend a lot of money on LOOKING successful without ACTUALLY BEING successful. And it helps somewhat.

If a guy is social or has connections for all the hotspots, drugs, etc., it would help if he has one of the other 3 above.

The point is, you have to have something about you that is interesting. If you have them, YOU CHOOSE the women, not vice versa. Women want guys for their resources most of the time. That's my ruling.

Case closed.

 

[Plinco]

My two ounces of silver:

Values is something that helps you and others to survive. This can be anything that is positive to other people, such as firefighting, self defense, humor, money (to a certain extent), etc. etc.

It is what you trade to get another value that you want.

 

[Plinco]

Also, what is perceived as a disvalue is often negative, such as giving somebody bad news that is not interesting or advantageous to them. Unfortunately, it is not uncommon for people to not properly determine the correct value or disvalue something is because people's minds are warped. So you might be giving somebody useful advise that should be valuable, yet that person will reject your advice because it is perceived as negative.

 

[Maxtro]

After reading over the replies, value appears to be complicated and very difficult to get unless you know what you are doing. The examples are great but feel unobtainable.

The only thing I have that I'm remotely skilled at are computer and even then it's just playing with them or minor support stuff.

I'm currently in college just trying not to hate it. Around the start of every new semester I have some hope that this semester will be the one where it's different and my life turns around.

For once I'd like to impress a woman. I just don't see it happening any time soon.

 

[Plinco]

After reading over the replies, value appears to be complicated and very difficult to get unless you know what you are doing. The examples are great but feel unobtainable.

The only thing I have that I'm remotely skilled at are computer and even then it's just playing with them or minor support stuff.

I'm currently in college just trying not to hate it. Around the start of every new semester I have some hope that this semester will be the one where it's different and my life turns around.

For once I'd like to impress a woman. I just don't see it happening any time soon.

You are not waiting for a miracle are you?

 

[Maxtro]

You are not waiting for a miracle are you?

Heh, no not a miracle.

In this world there are three types of men.

Men who get women without even trying (Super high value)
Men who chase women (Medium to low value)
Men who don't get women (no value)

Right now it seems impossible to become a high value male. One who has girls coming to him. But that doesn't mean that it will be impossible to get girls.

Every small improvement helps and eventually I'll hit the minimum threshold to get some decent action.

 

[ArcBound]

Heh, no not a miracle.

In this world there are three types of men.

Men who get women without even trying (Super high value)

Look sometimes it just seems easy on the surface. When we see that super buff guy in the streets with women we don't say "Oh he was training 3-5 days a week with a strict diet for several years and is now reaping his rewards."

Instead we say "Damn what a lucky guy! If I had his genetics I would have looked like him too."

When you see someone accomplish something big seemingly with little difficulty its what gives praise. Like I study a lot and ace classes, people go "holy crap you're so smart! i wish i was as smart as you!" But obviously they don't see the hours in my dorm room I spend studying really focusing on material. Because its less impressive saying "I aced the MCATs studying 12 hours a day for the past four years" then "I studied a little bit and aced the MCATs".

So these guys with super high value have "superhighvalue" for a reason, whether or not it looks like they worked hard on it. For all you know they put more effort into women then you but they just never show it. Just try to find out what makes these guys so super high value and see if its something that you can do as well.