How do y'all approach a random female?

[Building_and_Loan]

Approaching girls is not like riding a bike, where once you know how, it's easy from then on.

think of it more like conditioning, like being able to run a mile in under six minutes or something. I takes a while to be able to do it,and it takes consistent effort to keep doing it.

Start small, slow, and work your way up. Don't expect to ditch your anxiety by reading a post.

Eye contact

Eye contact and smile

Eye contact and approach and say hi

Eye contact and approach and short conversation

Eye contact and approach and short conversation and number close, etc.

See it like you would any other training regimen.

Surprised it took this long for someone to stress eye contact this much, but I believe it's one of the most important aspects to a successful approach. Holding eye contact and speaking clearly will bring her into your frame. If she likes you, she'll submit to your frame. Looking down or away often will make the interaction seem awkward or forced, and girls hate that.

 

[Plums]

So if we look at this comment logically and fairly, perhaps the poster could apply the same "helpful advice" to herself. Perhaps she
could accept difference points of views and learn to handle criticisms of her "advice" in a better way......you never know, she might
learn something....

Oh wait.....I'm trying to use logic to reason with it. It's going to be futile isn't it....

I tell you what, we'll give the logic route a go, in the name of fairness....

Go ahead then.......let's say, I'm open to learning from you......

What can you honestly "teach" me about day game?

Are you saying that you have more experience with regards to day gaming?

I'm all ears....

...........................................................................................................................................................

In my opinion, a woman cannot teach a man anything about day game......why? Simply put....she has no experience of being a man who day games.....she has never gone through the process as a man. She has never dealt with approach anxiety. She has never dealt with ****e tests from a woman while day gaming. She has never learned to hook a woman during a conversation while day game....

Of course she can offer her point of view from the woman's perspective. Right?

Fellas, would you take advice on how to fight from a kid who gets bullied? Why not? The kid knows about violence. He knows about
pain. He knows what it's like to receive knees to the ribs. He knows what it's like to receive upper cuts. He knows what it's like to receive devastating elbows.....
Surely he's in a really good position to teach you how to fight.........

Get out of here with that nonsense.

Why do you feel compelled to criticise? What does it give you exactly? Whatever it is, it certainly isn't constructive is it. You sound like a bitter old man who is jealous of a woman connecting with a man and trying to offer advice and support.
If this is an example of how you communicate with women at any level. Its more than advice you need mate.

 

[Serenity]

Approaching girls is not like riding a bike, where once you know how, it's easy from then on.

think of it more like conditioning, like being able to run a mile in under six minutes or something. I takes a while to be able to do it,and it takes consistent effort to keep doing it.

Start small, slow, and work your way up. Don't expect to ditch your anxiety by reading a post.

Eye contact

Eye contact and smile

Eye contact and approach and say hi

Eye contact and approach and short conversation

Eye contact and approach and short conversation and number close, etc.

See it like you would any other training regimen.

Or do as I did. Grow impatient and increasingly frustrated at yourself to the point you just go in and wing it. Of course with the full expectation of failing horribly.

I had this idea that if I just throw myself into the situations the sheer pressure alone would conjure up at least something to say. So it did. By the time I had forced myself there it would be more humiliating to walk away than to just try something, and almost magically my brain found a way to decrease the massive tension I felt.

I remember being at a club with my female cousin a few years back when I was really socially anxious around strangers. I had one beer and was practically sober when she jokingly told me to approach some random girl at another table. I just went for it, had a nice little chat, very soft rejection and came back to our table. My cousin's jaw dropped, she did not expect that I'd actually do it. She asked how many beers I had (I arrived a bit earlier than her), I said I only had one while waiting for her. I just laughed about it.

That wasn't really a big deal. I didn't score, but nothing really bad happened either. I had no clue what to say when I went up to that table, but when I was standing there I had no choice but to come up with something. I couldn't take the pressure of standing there like an idiot or walk away again, so I started talking.

Just notice when someone is talking almost non-stop, chances are they're trying to compensate their anxiety by filling silence with talking. When you're in a situation like that it's hard to shut up, your anxiety will actually help you avoid being at a loss for things to talk about.

So how to approach a woman? I'd say just do it and wing it. Exposure therapy has proved to be very effective, I say that from a personal perspective also.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

When you catch those rare but beautiful moments known as the IOI,
you are given an invitation to connect with a woman
at a primal, emotional, erotic level.
Men need to cultivate themselves
to spontaneously capitalize on this.
It's like, just for a moment,
the clutter of all our conditioning is lowered,
and we stand forth in our naked universal self
As Adam once did before Eve.

 

[ChristopherColumbus]

Or do as I did. Grow impatient and increasingly frustrated at yourself to the point you just go in and wing it. Of course with the full expectation of failing horribly.

I had this idea that if I just throw myself into the situations the sheer pressure alone would conjure up at least something to say. So it did. By the time I had forced myself there it would be more humiliating to walk away than to just try something, and almost magically my brain found a way to decrease the massive tension I felt.

I remember being at a club with my female cousin a few years back when I was really socially anxious around strangers. I had one beer and was practically sober when she jokingly told me to approach some random girl at another table. I just went for it, had a nice little chat, very soft rejection and came back to our table. My cousin's jaw dropped, she did not expect that I'd actually do it. She asked how many beers I had (I arrived a bit earlier than her), I said I only had one while waiting for her. I just laughed about it.

That wasn't really a big deal. I didn't score, but nothing really bad happened either. I had no clue what to say when I went up to that table, but when I was standing there I had no choice but to come up with something. I couldn't take the pressure of standing there like an idiot or walk away again, so I started talking.

Just notice when someone is talking almost non-stop, chances are they're trying to compensate their anxiety by filling silence with talking. When you're in a situation like that it's hard to shut up, your anxiety will actually help you avoid being at a loss for things to talk about.

So how to approach a woman? I'd say just do it and wing it. Exposure therapy has proved to be very effective, I say that from a personal perspective also.

Yes, the beginning of self-determination. Your story just goes to show how much we generally live in a culture of fear.

 

[corrector]

In the past, I've had real bad anxiety. To the point where I'd just get stuck and it know what to say (to attractive ladies). Ever since I started my job last year, I have gotten better. Way better.

I'm still a little shy (when idk you of course) and don't feel comfortable enough to just go up to random ladies. But, I've seen ladies check me out and smile at me, but really do not know how to approach them.

What are some of your techniques and a good way to overcome this shyness/anxiety?

Take a smart-phone and put it on camera mode and start taking pictures of her. She might start initiating a conversation with you as to what you are doing.

 

[Milfhunter95]

Thank you all for your input.

When it comes down to it, I am a stylistic person and have been told so by plenty of women. I guess I forgot to mention that I'm not really a shy person once I'm comfortable around you. So, once I've gotten comfortable around a female, they have told me I have a "special charm" and could probably get any girl I want, cause I'm "that slick" with my words. (I'm kind of a smart ass, so I've learned to come up with things to say back immediately. Also not a good thing, cause they get that player vibe, but they still love it). I also walk very confident (head up) and have been told by women that they found that "attractive".

Maybe some of y'all are right about having high expectations and thinking everything will be a score. I have been lucky in the past and instead of me asking for a number, I am given the number. Not every shot i shoot will make it and it's something I gotta learn to understand I guess

I talk to all kinds of different people every day, so it's not too hard for me to have eye contact, smile and starting conversation. I guess my only problem is keeping the conversation flowing and going for the final steps (Number/date). Which is something I feel like won't be hard to achieve after reading some of these responses. Thank you all once again