Girlfriend takes forever to respond or ignores.

[jacketrunner]

If it's my GIRLFRIEND, then I call her out on it, and see what she says. If she says something I don't like in response, or doesn't change her ways, then I dump her ass. That's that

All that pulling back for attention stuff is for plates, when it's your woman you check her ass, and get to the bottom of it

How? Easier said than done.

 

[jacketrunner]

You seem to be on this recurring sine wave with her behavior. You do something to express your displeasure, and it gets better, for a while. Then it drops back into the same old same old.

It's time to admit "you cannot change anyone" people are going to be WHO THEY ARE. Who she is right now is sometime who acts uninterested in her man. It would be a very safe bet to assume that this is who she will be with any man. You don't like the behavior. Take a step back and REALIZE that your personalities, and the way you believe you should behave in a relationship, towards your lover, is fundamentally incompatible.

Sure, sure, you can rationalize her behavior with "she's cheating" " she's about to cheat" or the good ol standby " she's just not interested anymore" but, fundamentally, there is a personality miss match and that will ultimately be the death of the relationship as you can't continually be "checking" her behavior, as if you were a parent.

All that said, stop initiating contact. From here on out, let her reach out. Eventually she will either fade away or she will reach out to you and ask why you seem so disinterested. If the conversation is initiated, at that time you can decide how you want to proceed.

If enough time goes by where she hasn't reached out, feel free to assume she's not interested, and start gaming other chicks.

Good luck.

This, I believe is the correct advice. As painful as it is, you should not call her out or seek closure until her IL rises from distance.

If you try to call her out or talk to her when you are the needy one, it will go poorly. You should strike while the iron is hot.

I'm saying this in theory, as someone who has not succeeded at all in his own relationship.

 

[btownbuck2012]

The only reason I believe she may not be cheating is because she told me she hadn’t had sex in years before me, and that she was,beginning to believe she might spend her life alone if she didn’t meet the right person

So what? Her behavior now is proof that that was a complete lie. I’ve been through this a few times. You’re dealing with a creature that has no regards for her word or integrity or other people. What she wants she tries to get, period. When she sees something else she wants, she will rationalize away any type of guilt in dropping you like a bag of dirt for her own survival. This is what women are. Our environment has created the psyche of the modern female to be absolutely ruthless and completely selfish in this regard.

 

[btownbuck2012]

OP if you really want to gain the upper hand you will send her a text saying “let’s see other people. Sorry” and then never talk to her again.

I realize you won’t do this and neither would a lot of guys, including my very recent self, and tbh that wish on my part is basically a form of nostalgia on my part wishing I could have a do over in how I handled women who have seriously hurt me in the past.

But oh how sweet it would be. She would lose her sh*t.

 

[kronreiff]

You over texted her and now you're in the boring zone to her. She seems to have moved on. The only way to check what her games are is to go no contact and let her get a hold of your FIRST. Her actions will tell you what she's all about at this point.

 

[17 shots]

How? Easier said than done.

I think I'll make a thread on it one day, because there's too much to say for me to answer this, I would have to really think it out and write it lol

 

[HankHill]

How? Easier said than done.

I think I'll make a thread on it one day, because there's too much to say for me to answer this, I would have to really think it out and write it lol

Why's that hard? There're two ways, one is a positive approach and then there's the negative approach if things are too far gone and you're just looking to clarify/end things.

"I'd appreciate it if you responded to my texts within 2hrs. Let me know if you can do that?"

"I don't appreciate it when you take 4+hrs to respond to my texts. If that's an indication of something that we need to talk about let me know."

State what you want or don't want, then be prepared to take action.

 

[Jay25]

Ok things have been better as of late after I ignored her for awhile and met up with her and ****ed her and watched a movie.

One thing she did that pissed me off is before the movie she told me to hurry up in a loud tone, I told her she better watch it and she said I was being sassy, and I said you better behave before I spank you, she kind of back down and tried to kiss me, should I take this as disrespect, did I do the right thing, I didn’t really check her other than jokingly.

Idk if I’m over analyzing or if it’s disrespect, she has been pursuing me.

 

[17 shots]

Why's that hard? There're two ways, one is a positive approach and then there's the negative approach if things are too far gone and you're just looking to clarify/end things.

"I'd appreciate it if you responded to my texts within 2hrs. Let me know if you can do that?"

"I don't appreciate it when you take 4+hrs to respond to my texts. If that's an indication of something that we need to talk about let me know."

State what you want or don't want, then be prepared to take action.

Nah, I can get way deeper then that

 

[Jay25]

Trust your gut

Idk what to trust because I seem to overalyze everything

 

[Billtx49]

Idk what to trust because I seem to overalyze everything

Don’t think it. Feel it. It feels right with her or it doesn’t …

 

[Jay25]

Don’t think it. Feel it. It feels right with her or it doesn’t …

I feel like i over analyze ****, it didn’t feel right when she said it though it felt rude, so I called her on it, I don’t feel she’s cheating

Should I call her in a more stern matter or just see if it happens again then just leave if it does

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I feel like i over analyze ****, it didn’t feel right when she said it though it felt rude, so I called her on it, I don’t feel she’s cheating

Should I call her in a more stern matter or just see if it happens again then just leave if it does

Someone can be "cheating" you just by cheating you out of time, putting you last... So it's not always getting outside sex.

 

[Jay25]

not much change to this situation, we had a good couple days and then she started being less affectionate again, the problem is when she comes back I never stick to my guns and play it cool, I am now, yesterday she jerked me around by calling me and barely even talking to me so I just ended the call, whats the point, she has been texting me a lot today but I’ve ignored it.

 

[Ranger]

Monkey branching. It’s over. Get he jump and end it or she will never respect you.
It’s over.