Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Try for solid commitments when you ask a girl out. Don't settle for "I'll let you know" or "I'll call you that day." In this case it may be harder since she might have work, but when does she find out what times she works for the week? If she doesn't know until say Sunday, you can still just be like "okay, well I can't guarantee I won't have made other plans by then" in a half-joking way.verysuave said:ahh thankx. So i called her up today (wednesday). asked for a date for next tuesday to go bowling and she said she'll definitely go if she's not working. We'll see.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
I think that something along the lines of "It's ok, but you're gonna have to make it up to me somehowverysuave said:so, i asked her out wednesday of last week..to hang out next tuesday
it was tuesday 2 days ago but i haven't called nor texted her since last wednesday to confirm the date since some crap came up and i didnt have time myself...
yesterday i get a text from her saying "hey,sorry about tuesday, i was super busy and had school, maybe some other time"
how should i respond (I haven't responded yet) or not respond at all?
if i do respond should i say:
#1 "that's okay, it doesn't matter to me"
#2 "yeah and maybe i might give you a 2nd chance =)
#3 "i only ask once
help, tnx
drtk said:I think that something along the lines of "It's ok, but you're gonna have to make it up to me somehow" is enough in your situation.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
okay this is how it went downcoolf1r3 said:Chase her, you animal, you.
Most likely, that's correct.I.A.F.Y.B. said:She said she is dating. She didn't say she had a boyfriend. So, looks like open game for you.