"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Girl is "dating"

verysuave

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i asked this chick if she's married, taken, single and she replied with "i'm dating"... (i manage to get her number)

soo, dating...meaning, she's ... willing to date other guys?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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(JJ)

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yes.

girls are always spinning plates.

i think you've just become one :up: congrats. lol
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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She said she is dating. She didn't say she had a boyfriend. So, looks like open game for you.
 

Chipleader

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That translates to Im looking for someone to date.
 

verysuave

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ahh thankx. So i called her up today (wednesday). asked for a date for next tuesday to go bowling and she said she'll definitely go if she's not working. We'll see.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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TheBucketOfTruth

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verysuave said:
ahh thankx. So i called her up today (wednesday). asked for a date for next tuesday to go bowling and she said she'll definitely go if she's not working. We'll see.
Try for solid commitments when you ask a girl out. Don't settle for "I'll let you know" or "I'll call you that day." In this case it may be harder since she might have work, but when does she find out what times she works for the week? If she doesn't know until say Sunday, you can still just be like "okay, well I can't guarantee I won't have made other plans by then" in a half-joking way.
 

verysuave

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okay, its monday now, she hasn't called told me what her schedule is.

Don't text and call? NEXT?
 

decades

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don't ask her that. assume she is available.
 

verysuave

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so, i asked her out wednesday of last week..to hang out next tuesday

it was tuesday 2 days ago but i haven't called nor texted her since last wednesday to confirm the date since some crap came up and i didnt have time myself...

yesterday i get a text from her saying "hey,sorry about tuesday, i was super busy and had school, maybe some other time"

how should i respond (I haven't responded yet) or not respond at all?

if i do respond should i say:

#1 "that's okay, it doesn't matter to me"
#2 "yeah and maybe i might give you a 2nd chance =)
#3 "i only ask once

help, tnx
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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drtk

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verysuave said:
so, i asked her out wednesday of last week..to hang out next tuesday

it was tuesday 2 days ago but i haven't called nor texted her since last wednesday to confirm the date since some crap came up and i didnt have time myself...

yesterday i get a text from her saying "hey,sorry about tuesday, i was super busy and had school, maybe some other time"

how should i respond (I haven't responded yet) or not respond at all?

if i do respond should i say:

#1 "that's okay, it doesn't matter to me"
#2 "yeah and maybe i might give you a 2nd chance =)
#3 "i only ask once

help, tnx
I think that something along the lines of "It's ok, but you're gonna have to make it up to me somehow ;)" is enough in your situation.
 

verysuave

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okay, UPDATE!

last night chick texts me about 12 hours ago, and didnt receive her mssge till this morning

in the text it says:

"hi verysuave, what days do you have off this week?"

LOL...

okay, okay, im gona leave it to the experts here as to how i should respond.

And this week, i do have friday and saturday off.

No, seriously,should I just say "yeah got saturday off" ? or just make up a lie and say, i'll be away for the weekend, however we can hang out next week?

tnx



drtk said:
I think that something along the lines of "It's ok, but you're gonna have to make it up to me somehow ;)" is enough in your situation.
 

verysuave

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im thinking mabe like

"im off this saturday.. but, you are probably busy this weekend"
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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verysuave

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coolf1r3 said:
Chase her, you animal, you.
okay this is how it went down

there was a 30 minute gap in between texts with me
hb: "hi verysuave, what days do you have off this week?"
me: "so, whatcha doing this weekend?" (i decided not to tell her what im doing...but instead I turned it around, cuz its MY turn to test her to see h
hb: "im working this weekedn =("
me: "hey, im working this weekend too! but elsewhere =)" (i've decided that, im not gona ask her out anymore since i already did that once. and already showed my interest)

I KNEW for a fact that that was a shiet test when she asked me "hi verysuave, got any days off this week?" IM STARTING TO NOTICE that when women asks you questions like that, it doesn't mean THEY ARE ASKING YOU TO HANG OUT WITH THEM YET or a sign for you to ASK THEM OUT, they are simply asking if you have a "DAY OFF" and nothing else.. it's like some kinda trick question these women try to pull. so she responds with

hb: "yeah, let me know what your days off u have next week and i'll make plans"


CHA CHING!
 

verysuave

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would leonadis from 300 chase women? ask for sex? NO. I'm noticing the trolls on this board
 

Igetit!

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What I would do is make it seem like you are busy,but you have a "little" time available. Kind of like a "limited time only" sale. You have Saturday off,right? So say something like this,"Well,I do have Saturday off,but I have plans to (whatever),but I should be finished around 6 or 7 o'clock. This makes it seem like you have a life,you have friends and other things going on in you life,and if she wants to be a part of it,here is a small window of time she can use. However,if she chooses not to,she might have to wait another week or two before you might have more free time.
 

tsmith2334

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I.A.F.Y.B. said:
She said she is dating. She didn't say she had a boyfriend. So, looks like open game for you.
Most likely, that's correct.
 
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